To think that no woman enjoys this and to wonder why men think we do?

[AnachronisticCorpse]

I will preface this by saying I love DH very very much and this isn’t some awful deal breaker.

BUT every weekend morning DH wakes me up by grinding his morning glory against my thigh. This morning he’d actually got up really early without waking me but he came back to bed at 8.30 and STILL woke me up with the rhythmic grinding.

And then once I was awake he started talking at me about amps and effects processors (we have an agreement that I didn’t have to engage in these ‘conversations’ beyond saying ‘uh huh’ every once in a while). All through this conversation he was dry humping me.

I told him to stop and he said that a) he hadn’t even realised he was doing it and b) he always thought I liked it.

Basically it’s something I tolerate because he’s otherwise marvellous but the combination of nerd monologue AND slow Jack Russelling was just too much this morning.

But thinking about it, every man I’ve ever woken up with (a not insignificant number) has done this. Whhhhyyyyyyy? What makes them think being randomly poked is in anyway sexy or romantic?

Does ANYONE like it?

As MN164 pointed out XR200/201 are not studio gear so your DP is suffering from something. Maybe a (very) cold damp flannel would help?

oh shit @dandelion and @stayandfight my apologise im currently high on painkillers so apparently not making much sense. Also, paragraphs seem to disappear once I press the send button.

Basically, The people on this thread who think it's borderline none consensual are weird and creepy in my opinion.

Any1 who has a male partner who gets a hard on in front of children, no matter what they are doing, has big issues.

Op, you and your dh sound like me and my dh, regarding the joke playfulness.
Also, I understood what she meant both by humping and the comedy act that they do in from of the teenagers and it is not inappropriate.

Hope that's more clear
xx

oh for fuck sake! Forget it I give up between my brain and the auto correct on my phone I'm fucked.😔😔

I understood what she meant both by humping and the comedy act that they do in from of the teenagers and it is not inappropriate.

I don’t think it’s “inappropriate” per se. I do think it’s embarrassing, a bit icky and I would cringe myself inside out if I saw someone do “a comedy snog and grind in the kitchen” irl (not envy). I’m amazed people think this is a right larf and not just really foul. Not a crime, as I keep saying, just really embarrassing and undignified, .

Also it sounds as if it's actually part of your sex play and arousal that you do this in front of your children even though you both know they hate it.

And the award for most ridiculous post ever goes to...

In my many years of marriage this has never happened.
It's inappropriate if you don't like it. Just be honest with him and tell him in no uncertain terms to stop.
Happy marriages are built on being honest with your partner.

I think you just have bought as luck OP. Not something I have experienced.

The scant few times me and dp actually wake up together results in this, a bit of morning snuggles and casual grinding. I find it sexy as hell but I wouldn't in the bloody kitchen or out of the bedroom. Dp does have a habit of slapping my ass though no matter where we are

I get this , and do not like it at all. Never have, and have said many times to just leave me the fuck alone if I am asleep, yet it still happens, just now he pretends to be asleep when he is doing it so that when the 'I have told you before' response comes he can claim ignorance

Have also has issues in the past with him taking my hand, when i am asleep and plonking it on his crotch. Or even, and I know this part is not normal, touching me up when I am asleep. have told him I find it creepy and tbf I have not had that for a while now.

But it makes me really not want sex at all as I do find it all really creepy and a massive pain in the arse. So it has the opposite effect to what he hopes it will. I feel a bit bad for saying this on here now too.

I like it. But then I'm a bit of a Jack Russeller too. & I will smack OHs bum or brush past him very closely when it's just us indoors sometimes, we joke around like that. I draw the line at nerdy convo tho. Although I'm mightily impressed by your man's ability to multitask in that department ie 2 completely unrelated subjects

The reas

Oh God DH does this! Drives me spare. He also does the 'Jack Russelling' especially when I'm doing something semi-dangerous like lifting a roasting dish out of the oven or something. I generally bellow at him & he acts all hurt. FFS