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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Parents of Ds's friend annoying.

201 replies

BuffyBee · 16/03/2018 00:51

Really don't know what you'll think of this! Could be just me!
But, every time we get Ds9 a Birthday/Christmas present, within a couple of days his friend has been bought the same thing, even though it's not a Special occasion for him.
We have three kids and it's sometimes a struggle to buy a big gift, Ds has to wait for Special occasions for expensive things and somehow, his friend getting the same gift two days later, takes away the shine for me.
So Ds had an expensive electronics gift which he got with his Christmas money and was chuffed to bits, two days later his friend was bought the same.
It hasn't just happened a couple of times, it's been the last five years and it's every single time Ds gets anything, bike, scooter, electronics etc.
What are his parents thinking by doing this?
AIBU for it to get on my nerves?

OP posts:
Thistlebelle · 16/03/2018 13:07

Buy you ds a tandem or a toy that's for more than 1 dc.

Great idea to hire something really expensive. Or as I said earlier borrow something expensive, and watch the parents go and spend a grand computing you

Both these ideas are incredibly mean hearted.

The second idea particularly, how would you explain that to your son without looking dreadful?

User14567891 · 16/03/2018 13:08

yeah you don't seem to be able to BEAR it that people have different views to you HUN. Now bore off, you're embarrassing yourself

Great argument HUN. You sound really clever. 😂😂😂
Seriously tho, I’m imagining you typing away like this 🤬😤🤯. Chill out a bit before you hurt yourself.

user1490607838 · 16/03/2018 13:08

@Talkingboutwhat

Unless you've been the victim of a copy cat you just can't understand it. I remember my DSis had a copycat in our community, not even a close friend. She would always buy the same clothing as my DSIS, and when my DSis started to source more unique items she would ask here where she had bought them and would got seriously annoyed at not being told.

Great post! You would have to BE the victim of this weird stalker-like behaviour to understand.

It is horrible, suffocating, stalker behaviour, and these people deserve to be taught a lesson. That is why I (and several others) have suggested renting or borrowing something expensive and let them spend their money getting the same thing. They deserve no less. Grin

Ignore the people telling you that you are in the wrong. As I said, they are clearly the type of people who do what the parents of this lad do! They must do, otherwise, why defend it so fervently?!

starray · 16/03/2018 13:12

Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery?

User14567891 · 16/03/2018 13:13

Great idea to hire something really expensive. Or as I said earlier borrow something expensive, and watch the parents go and spend a grand computing you

Yeah that is a great idea. Waste money yourself on something to try and trick someone else into wasting money.
As pp said incredibly spiteful intent but also pointless. It would just end up with the friend having a really cool expensive toy and the OPs kid being upset because he had to give his new hired/borrowed toy back.

schrodingerstwat · 16/03/2018 13:14

@user1490607838 why do you keep repeating yourself?? You've mentioned twice that you think the other parents are on this thread. An unfunny attempted joke doesn't become funny just because you yell it twice!

TwoDrifters · 16/03/2018 13:15

I totally get this. It’s not about wanting the other boy not to have nice things or being jealous the other family have more money, it’s about the lack of imagination or individuality. It just feels stifling.

Imagine OP had said “I have a really close friend who copies everything I do and buy. I save for months to buy a new handbag, the next time I see her, she has the same handbag. I join an evening class for still life drawing, the next week she’s there too!” I’m sure many of the replies would have been different.

Being constantly copied can feel as if your own individuality is being slowly eroded and it can get irritating very fast, no matter how often you are told it’s flattering.

user1490607838 · 16/03/2018 13:16

@User14567891

You do realise don't you HUN that using these

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

in every fucking post - does NOT make you or your posts and more clever or smart or witty than anyone else's. Confused

Now just do one. No-one is listening to you, and you are starting to come across as a stalker yourself now, with how you keep targeting ME.

FFS bore off and quit bugging me. Hmm

I am ignoring you now, as that is what you deserve.

See ya! 🙄

user1490607838 · 16/03/2018 13:17

@twodrifters

Imagine OP had said “I have a really close friend who copies everything I do and buy. I save for months to buy a new handbag, the next time I see her, she has the same handbag. I join an evening class for still life drawing, the next week she’s there too!” I’m sure many of the replies would have been different.

Exactly. People would have been saying the friend is batshit.

schrodingerstwat · 16/03/2018 13:18

@user1490607838

Seriously you're coming across as a little unhinged with all the anger. It's only AIBU; it's not worth getting upset over.

user1490607838 · 16/03/2018 13:19

Yep, the parents are defo on this thread.

schrodingerstwat · 16/03/2018 13:20

That is now three times that you've said that @user1490607838 Grin

User14567891 · 16/03/2018 13:22

user1490607838

Your posts are increasing rabid. Do you know what a stalker is? It is clearly not this.
Do you have kids? All the kids I know like having the same toys as their friends because they can play with them together.
The OP has said clearly that her son has no problem with this. It is only the OP that is upset.
The other parents getting their kid the same toy probably means OPs kid can enjoy his toys more, but what matters to OP is that she gets to feel special? Superior? Because her kid’s got something that another child hasn’t. Of course that is weird and petty.
it’s unsurprising that the type of person that defends that behaviour comes out with the kind of crazy, badly-thought through spite that you are suggesting.

schrodingerstwat · 16/03/2018 13:22

I refer you to my previous comment:

An unfunny attempted joke doesn't become funny just because you yell it twice three times

user1490607838 · 16/03/2018 13:22

Careful, you are in danger of stalking too @schrodetwat HUN.

user1490607838 · 16/03/2018 13:22

Stalky posters are stalky.

user1490607838 · 16/03/2018 13:23

Bit weird this. Creeping me out tbh. Confused

User14567891 · 16/03/2018 13:23

user1490607838

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

schrodingerstwat · 16/03/2018 13:23

Why are you calling everyone HUN in capitals? just curious....

user1490607838 · 16/03/2018 13:23

And it seems the parents of this boy are DEFO on this thread.

user1490607838 · 16/03/2018 13:24

More hysterical laughing smileeees. Fuck me this is so odd.

schrodingerstwat · 16/03/2018 13:26

Fourth time...Wow - what do you know, it may be becoming funny after all!! I have tears rolling down my face here as does my DP who is reading over my shoulder Grin

user1490607838 · 16/03/2018 13:26

I am ignoring you now too. You are a BIT odd.

schrodingerstwat · 16/03/2018 13:28

Are you ignoring me in the same way you are ignoring User14567891...i.e. not at all Grin?

WeAllHaveWings · 16/03/2018 13:30

If ds's friend got the same toy as ds's birthday present, especially something like a scooter, I would think it was great they could play together. It would never cross my mind that they were copying, or taking the shine of ds's present and neither would ds. I bought ds a scooter shortly after Xmas as some of his friends had one and he was the only one without does that mean I copied and all their mums were annoyed at me? Its a scooter, a very common toy, you don't get to baggsie toys that no one else can buy.

Some people buy their dc material things more frequently than others and those ideas will obviously be influenced by what is popular in their friendship group, absolutely nothing wrong with that and you need to stop being so weird and competitive, in a I've got something no one else has sort of way, about it.