AIBU to think some people should just grow up

[ithinksheisawuss]

Details changed and I’ve name changed to stop it being identifiable.

AIBU to think some people just need to grow up and get on with it at work?

I work in a busy fast paced environment. It’s a big office with two distinct areas. On one side are the sales people this is high stress and loud, on the other side is the support staff area which is much gentler. The support staff are mainly older women, the sales staff are a mixed bunch.

The sales side is very robust, lots of swearing and mickey taking. Some days people let off steam by shouting we all just laugh and get on with it, no one takes offence. When someone shouts we laugh at them then they laugh and the tension breaks. We need this release sometimes.

Anyway, one of the support ladies lady S was doing a job at the sales end of the office colleague A put the phone down and started to shout. Lady S asked a question of colleague A and colleague A shouted. She didn’t shout at lady S - she was just shouty iyswim.

Lady S has put in a formal complaint saying she has been bullied and colleague A was unprofessional. Colleague A often behaves like this it’s her passion that makes her good at her job.

If all the sales staff behaved in the quiet demure way the support staff do no sales would get made! But the whole support area is up in arms about poor lady S.

TBH I think lady S is a bit of a wuss but I am wondering if I am too harsh. Colleague A is really valuable to the business, lady S is easily replaceable.

sorry Ithinksheisawuss

I will leave you go back to your windows, boilers, mobiles, PPI, no claims or whatever the hell you are selling Because that what salespeople do apparently.
if you are in the holiday business, feel free to PM with special deals

Double glazing

Ohhhhh how I wish I wish I was that good.

The fact you've said lady S is worth less has really got me It doesn't matter how valuable she is to the business. She is a human being just like colleague A and should be treated exactly the same. I feel really disheartened by that line of your post. Steps off soapbox

I have just RTFT and I still think that the sales team are unprofessional, old-fashioned, and risibly up their own arses. High pressure, my arse. Come over to the military and police for a start. I've worked in sales, very high value sales in fact, and the only person who behaved like the apparent two year olds in the Op's team soon learned that he wasn't indispensable. That entire sales team would be taken aside in most organisations and be reminded of the expectations of behaving in an adult, professional and respectful manner. Were I to have behaved in such a pathetic manner in a genuinely high pressure situation, I would likely have been up on a charge of conduct unbecoming.

I would hope that the Op would genuinely reflect on her thoroughly nasty and pathetically condescending attitudes to her own colleagues in support but it doesn't seem to be likely, given her apparent inability to understand how she is behaving and justifying bullying behaviour by simply posting this thread, with it's title and her goady name change.

Do try to grow up, OP, and learn some respect and professional standards.

Incidentally, the salespeople I have come across from a locally well-known and rapidly expanding double-glazing firm have been universally polite, quiet and respectful. Incidentally, their product and service is known to be excellent, so they don't have to behave like knobs to make sales. In fact, anyone behaving like knobs in the manner the Op described would not get a sale from me.

Oh, apologies for the grammatical and spelling errors. I really think that my mobile's autocarrot hates me.

Autocarrot!? Yep. Payback time!
😹
Excellent post, incidentally.

SweetLike -

Agreed.

Toomanypaws very robust post with some good points. No name calling, you make a point to be polite about double glazing sales people. You criticise the actions not the person.

I have repeatedly said this type of post is robust and healthy, makes you think.

Posts that say things like “pay back time” now that’s the kind of thing a member of my team might say.

The whole place sounds like a fucking toxic nightmare.
I can't stand loud shouty rude people who think everyone else should just put up with being treated rudely.

This

I concur.

I used to work for a company where the sales team were clueless primadonnas. They had no respect for the people making the product they were selling and no appreciation for the fact that the majority of the 'sales' were on credit terms, so it was someone elses job to actually get the money in. That company has gone bust now. YABU btw.

The thing is, shouting routinely and pointlessly at work is twatty behaviour - it's difficult to find any more complimentary way of describing it. Even if we left out the term "twat" the plain fact is everyone would still be describing this behaviour as immature, childish, silly, rude, unprofessional etc because that is what it is - and I suspect you would still accuse them of bullying, OP.

On the other hand, you see nothing wrong with this behaviour and think it's just "bantz" - which is in itself an incredibly immature term. So if you endorse and indeed enjoy silly behaviour and come on here to say that someone who dislikes it should grow up, you need to accept the consequences.

Basically, it just sounds like behaviour I would expect to see at a football match, not in an office. There's a time and place for that, and it's not at work.

I don’t understand why people need to shout at work. What’s wrong with having a civilised conversation like adults? Or does the vocabulary not allow for that?

You haven't been bullied, you've been insulted. Numerous times, by numerous different posters.

That still isn't bullying, you do need to look at your behaviour at work, and of your colleagues. You'd be in serious trouble in any company that takes employee welfare seriously.

You haven't been bullied, you've been insulted. Numerous times, by numerous different posters.
so let me get this straight, that wasn't bullying.

However, the person who was standing next to someone shouting some expletive - not directed at her - that person WAS bullied and right to make a complaint about it?

Having abuse and personal insults directed at you is not bullying, hearing loud swear words is?

right... glad we clarified this

Op imagine it this way. We're in a pub. You recount you hilarious story slagging off your colleague expecting us to guffaw with laughter and agree that this stupid colleague who you are belittling and patronising should indeed grow up - but instead one of us (and yes, I would say this direct) actually you sound like a bunch of twats,then no. I don't consider that bullying. I consider that to be someone very bluntly calling you out on shoddy behaviour. Blunt? Yes? Brutal? Possibly. Bullying? No. There is a difference.