To find the term 'child free' annoying?

[stuffstuffeverywhere]

Why not just say you don't want kids? Why do people have to make it sound like some dietary requirement? It's as if they see small humans as some kind of allergen or digestive irritation to be avoided.

stuffstuffeverywhere - I am sweetcorn free too!

However, I am also child free, except I have never used that term and probably never will. If someone asks me if I have children, I simply answer "no". If they persist, I tell them that I don't like children very much and never fancied having them. Yes that's not very polite, but nor is quizzing me about the status of my family.

Luckily nobody much seems to ask, or appears to care, so I don't have to rattle out my response very often.

I really wasn't, you shouldn't speak for a whole class of people if you mean your particular opinion, and don't have a shit fit when someone points it out to you.

It's not a 'shit fit', I was just defending myself. Ok I worded it wrongly, but you seem to be looking for a fight. Are we going to be going at each other all day?

Anyway, the subject had moved on so why did you choose to come back at me?

I just commented on your point, which I did not agree with, and you went mental about it. Chill out, fgs. It's a discussion board, people are going to comment when you say things!

YABU. Going child-free is a choice for many people, just like going dairy-free or meat-free.
But people don't call themselves 'meat free' or 'dairy free', do they (or I've never come across anyone doing that!)? People say 'I don't eat meat/dairy'; they may purchase products with that on the packaging, but they don't label themselves with those terms.

I just feel sorry for the OP in that she feels so burdened by her own children that seeing other people happily say they dont have any gives her the rage! How dare they be happy with different choices!
I suspect its the same as the fact tha people who are the most homophobic are often secretly gay.

Ok, I went 'mental' in one post, yes I used caps once, how outrageous. Hahaha!! I didn't swear or say anything rude, did I? I just pulled you up on the way you twisted what I said, and carried on with it when I clarified what I meant.

Maybe you're the one that needs to 'chill' now, as you're the one going on about it.

Has it occurred to you that this is a hard subject for some of us? I couldn't have my own kids, and while we've adopted 2 DDs now, it's still hard sometimes. And I was suggesting a partial point of view some people might have. Yes, I should have said 'some of us' and not 'those of us'.

Would you stop? You don't know who its a hard subject for, or why, so just stop. If you don't want responses to posts, don't post.

Just don't reply then, and I won't say anything more, I promise. I was trying to move on when I was explaining why it got to me in that one post. And I will say sorry if that's what you're angling for.

Anyway, to change the subject. @StormTreader you may be right about the OP, but I think it was a goady opening post to light a fuse. She's long gone and left us all having a bun fight!!

"It's as if they see small humans as some kind of allergen or digestive irritation to be avoided."

I have to say my two small humans were a bit like that when they were younger and if they irritated me what on earth must they have been like for others to put up with?

Still, I would never have wanted to be 'child free'. My DS and DD are my greatest blessing. It's a bit like saying 'head free' or 'leg free'.

@Lizzie48 I think you're right! This will probably end up in the Daily Fail shiterag and then we'll all be sorry!

But they are what you say - an irritation to be avoided for a lot of people. We have dairy free, fat free, gluten free, smoke free, all substances to be avoided by some people, add children and old people to the list.

I think that could be called 'ageist' on Mumsnet, @manicmij though curiously children are fair game. (Speaking as someone who can be very irritated by my own DDs. )

Hey, what's that about old people? Now that's going a step too far!!

It's not my personal view of children or older people, It's what I see and hear going on. Children are pests, older people old gits.both to be avoided as are all the other "freefrom" items mentioned.

Ah yes, but what do those people consider as 'old'?? Not them, obviously lol, it will always be someone older than them.

OP seemed a bit strange, didn't she? Like a flash storm, passing through MN!

Lizzie, your post reminded me of my grandad who spent a week in a care home whilst my parents took a break. When I went to visit him, he said vehemently "I'm not staying here- they're all OLD! He was 86

Lol, and my DH tells me his grandad used to be that way, too. He died at 96 and apparently said, 'Look at all those old people' when he saw a group of elderly people getting off a bus. He was 90 then, I think.

I'm childfree because while I love my niece & nephew, for me personally parenthood would be my idea of hell. So I choose to free myself of it. That's not remotely the same as people who would love to have kids and couldn't so it would be daft to use the same term - although come to think of it, as some others have said I only use childfree on MN.

If someone asked me in RL, I'd just say I didn't have kids, but I'd probably sound far too happy about that fact for them to start sympathising.

As for being odd or sad or going against my programming... nope. 44, the programming never kicked in and my life right now with friends & family & career is just about the best it's ever been.

I think we've got too hung up on the "if someone asked me". You probably wouldn't use the term if someone asked you because that'd be weird phrasing.

If someone asked me if I had kids, or dogs, in a direct reply I'd say "nope" or "two beagles" as appropriate.

But if I were describing myself I might say "I am child-free" or "I am a dog-lover" or similar.