Giving my ex an ultimatum about mother’s day

[marlinf]

My ex and I have a two year old ds, but split up before he was born. Things were acrimonious for quite a while but we are on really good terms now which I’m so happy and relieved about for ds’s sake.

Ex has a girlfriend of less than a year. He and I arranged to have lunch together yesterday for mother’s day with ds (he would have seen him anyway that day, we sometimes spend time together, sometimes he spends time with ds on his own)

Apparently when ex told his gf we were having mother’s day lunch together she went mad and told him that if he went ahead she would break up with him. He went ahead anyway. She said it was inappropriate and that if anything she should have been invited too. I’ve never met her and from what ex has says in the past she is a bit jealous of me, so while I have no objection in theory to her coming along I feel like it would have been awkward and detracted from the three of us having a relaxed time.

So now she has broken up with him and I’m wondering, was she BU or were we?

Thought you were going! @marlinf

And 8 months relationship is a casual fuck?

Don't talk shit.

As op has refused to answer my questions I can only guess that her ex got the choice of either you meet us for md or no contact. And your gf cannot come.

Of course ex would not miss out on time with his son. He most likely did not want to meet you op but you have him no choice

Very very sad

Flouncing now because people don’t agree with you.What have we got to be bitter and jealous about? What a strange response to call people you don’t know bitter and jealsous because they disagree

Sounds like a really good arrangement, can only be good for your DS, but, he was being disloyal by discussing the problem with you. His girlfriend was BU, but she was entitled to make her feelings known without it getting back to you. He’ll never keep a girlfriend if he continues to behave like this.

The lack of self awareness the OP has is startling.

It's the MN way marlinf.

Some people can not comprehend the fact that other people do things differently to them.

It does not compute, and they start to malfunction.

Bye hun.
Don't let the jealous bitches dull your sparkle babes.
xoxox

malinf you're sounding a little unhinged yourself dear. People have different views on this situation - nobody is 'insecure' or 'delicate' because they happen to think that Mothers' Day is about the relationship between a woman and her children rather than a woman and her ex!

FWIW my ex and I spend birthday celebrations for our DCs (& sometimes for each other) together, we spend Xmas together and if either of us happens to be in a serious relationship, we would bring our partners along too. THAT is what being secure looks like, not keeping his GF at arms length so that you can pretend you still have a lovely little family and then crowing about them splitting up on the internet to prove how important you are to him.

It is Aibu OP, sometimes others don’t always agree!

I am @ you accusing others of throwing tantrums, as you storm off having a tantrum!

Gone off with her tail between her legs to sulk, because people put her in her place and called her out for what she really is.

Boo hoo.

I’m my peer group it’s more usual to see seperated parents joining up for family celebrations

Mine too - no dramz, just grown up people being grown ups.

Redandsilver You think the OP is being immature??? She's the one who is clearly able to maintain a civilised relationship with her child's father. That's the epitome of mature and sensible to me.

I'm not convinced his now ex gf is the only insecure one. You seem rather insecure about the fact most people think your meal is not the norm and rather smug about your gatecrashing priority over his gf on his contact day.. Do you often tag along on his contact days?

And has defended herself against the usual MN pitchfork brigade who piled in on here to attack her for daring to call them out on it.

@Almostdonewiththis

Wake up and smell the bullshit. The OP is loving the drama she is causing and is attacking anyone who doesn't agree with her.

Sounds like it mini- in the OP she says 'sometimes he sees DS on his own'.

pitchfork brigage?

Grow up!

The only drama on here is from the pitchfork brigade.

@almostdonewiththis

Pitchfork brigade!!!

Grow up!

If this meal is "not the norm" then isn't that a rather sad indictment of the way too many people let their own jealousies and insecurities (such as the now-ex girlfriend) get in the way of a child's relationship with both his parents.

Wah people don't agree with me, so it's a witch hunt.

What a load of shit.

@almostdonewiththis you sound a LOT like the OP.

Having read your further comments OP I agree with this
I can see you going to be one of those nightmare ex’s the stepmothers talk about on the step parenting board over lack of boundaries

Grow up!

😂😂

Yes!
Grow up!

(Apparently being grown up involves getting really, really cross because someone does things differently to you...)