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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Help me school this prat at work

334 replies

WobbleHead · 08/03/2018 20:19

IWD today, obvs, so one guy on our team work messaging chat (about 20 people on there) shared this pic. What banter eh.

I replied saying ‘sorry I don’t get it Confused - can you explain the joke’, and he’s said that he will explain to me tomorrow at work, the delight that he is.

Cue others on the chat offering to book a meeting room, film it, send a company wide invite etc so we can all witness his explanation.

I feel like just watching him squirm in front of the whole team won’t be enough, so I wanted to plan a line of questioning or whatnot that would maximise the enjoyment for all involved, except for him, and not make me look like a humourless fun sponge in the process.

Ideas?

Help me school this prat at work
OP posts:
iheartmichellemallon · 10/03/2018 12:42

I completely understood you pumper - I think the ignorance on this thread is staggering. Hopefully callmeadoctor isn't actually one but I can see That1950smum's username is very apt.

This feels like an alternate universe on here right now - how seemingly intelligent people can't see the effect that constant micro-aggressions against women in the workplace has a long term detrimental effect. The Op hasn't kicked up a fuss or gone to HR but is calling it out - as we all should, men included.

OldPony · 10/03/2018 13:00

They don't come acreoss as seemingly intelligent to me. This thread is a perfect example of how the intelligence on MN has lowered drastically.

It used to be funny threads about radio 4. Now it's filled with thick chavs.

Kaybush · 10/03/2018 13:18

If this guy is a repeat offender, then I can see how it would grate, as you'd be aware of his offensive values.

But if it's isolated, then you're being completely ridiculous.

Badbilly · 10/03/2018 13:23

"They don't come acreoss as seemingly intelligent to me. This thread is a perfect example of how the intelligence on MN has lowered drastically.

It used to be funny threads about radio 4. Now it's filled with thick chavs."

I think my irony meter just went off the scale

OldPony · 10/03/2018 13:23

Dur

BeyondDispair · 10/03/2018 13:38

Just leaving this here.....

www.suffolkgazette.com/news/international-womens-day-iron/

MrMeSeeks · 10/03/2018 13:55

I think my irony meter just went off the scale
Grin

CadyHeron · 10/03/2018 13:57

It used to be funny threads about radio 4. Now it's filled with thick chavs.

Oh,nice. People with different senses of humour to you or opinions and they're "thick chavs."
Why the name calling for a differing of opinion? Has anyone started calling names for your opinions, maybe something like miserable farts with sticks up their arses?
No. So why the need to name call from your "side?"
Totally losing the moral high ground when you resort to playground insults.

CadyHeron · 10/03/2018 13:58

I think my irony meter just went off the scale

Grin
CadyHeron · 10/03/2018 14:01

What do you call a singing laptop? A Dell

Grin Actually lolled!
That1950sMum · 10/03/2018 14:19

*They don't come across as seemingly intelligent to me. This thread is a perfect example of how the intelligence on MN has lowered drastically.

It used to be funny threads about radio 4. Now it's filled with thick chavs.*

Nice.

Are you aware that two intelligent people can have different opinions on an issue?

Original poster
WobbleHead · 10/03/2018 14:52

Holding a sexist attitude has nothing to do with class or intelligence.

OP posts:
Badbilly · 10/03/2018 15:02

Holding a sexist attitude has nothing to do with class or intelligence.

Well, according to some posters it does - those disagreeing with your stance that it is sexist are all unintelligent chavs, apparently.

Pumperthepumper · 10/03/2018 15:14

Has anyone started calling names for your opinions, maybe something like miserable farts with sticks up their arses? No. So why the name calling

The OP has been called hysterical, ridiculous, a fun sponge, silly, accused of giving feminists a bad name - and that’s just the ones I can remember! Have you read this thread?

I don’t agree with the use of ‘chav’, that’s uncalled for.

Pumperthepumper · 10/03/2018 15:16

Sorry, I got your quote slightly wrong at the end, my phone doesn’t like copy and pasting twice.

Firesuit · 10/03/2018 15:18

Assuming that someone expressing a sexist attitude is sexist is a bit ...

(searches for a polite phrase)

...simplistic?

Badbilly · 10/03/2018 15:28

I don’t agree with the use of ‘chav’, that’s uncalled for

But calling someone "unintelligent" for having the temerity to disagree with someone is OK is it?

And you don't see the irony in the attitudes on this thread (no pun intended by "irony" BTW).

Pumperthepumper · 10/03/2018 15:47

I do feel like I have a grip on irony, yes - that’s why I listed a few of the insults aimed at the OP.

I feel ‘chav’ is uncalled for because it’s a classist insult. It’s a horrible word. The PP is entitled to her view that people on this thread are unintelligent - that’s her opinion.

Badbilly · 10/03/2018 16:14

The PP is entitled to her view that people on this thread are unintelligent - that’s her opinion.

But surely that's an "ism" in itself, albeit an unnamed one. Because someone has a different opinion to you they are deemed as of lesser intelligence? Tell me the difference between that and the type of mild sexism shown in the original meme.

If nothing else that is insulting, as well as stereotyping and "othering".

It's one step away from "they are too thick to vote".

Pumperthepumper · 10/03/2018 16:27

Badbilly I’m afraid I can’t speak for the PP - I guess you’ll have to take that up with her.

But I would suggest that it’s not because the other posters had a different opinion - more that they were willing to post things like ‘my white male son and husband are considered the dregs of society’ (might not be the exact phrasing, sorry, can’t c&p from this phone) which is patently false. Or suggesting the meme wasn’t sexist, when it so clearly is. I don’t believe these posters actually think that, however, more that they’re happy to be willfully ignorant to ridicule the OP.

And I suppose the difference between sexism and calling someone unintelligent is - sexism is the root cause for a lot of harm in the world (rape, murder, abuse, violence, pay inequality, medical care...). Calling someone unintelligent is an insult that they are free to refute.

Badbilly · 10/03/2018 16:34

Or suggesting the meme wasn’t sexist, when it so clearly is.

Then why do so many people on this thread disagree with you on this assumption?

DailyMailReadersAreThick · 10/03/2018 16:38

Holding a sexist attitude has nothing to do with class or intelligence.

Yes, it does. Sexist people are more likely to be less intelligent.

Badbilly · 10/03/2018 16:41

‘my white male son and husband are considered the dregs of society’ (might not be the exact phrasing, sorry, can’t c&p from this phone)

Except, of course, when they are called chavs, which even you agree is "too far".

I don't want to come across all "what about the..." but white lower class males AND females are highly discriminated against and sneered at and called things like "chavs". This is often based on their perceived intelligence.

Abbylee · 10/03/2018 16:43

Pumper, my son and husband are not hired bc companies need to hire women and minorities. Idk? Is that discrimination? Not being hired bc you are not a gender or a race? I did work in hr, i was asked by managers to send candidates who were not white males.

So, I think that we need to hire based on qualifications.

By "Demonizing" I meant judging evil bc a person is white and male. It wasn't lighthearted bc if it were taken that way she would have thought the irony was a little funny; instead she needed to "school" him. A wording that I would find offensive used by a man or woman joking or not bc of its condescension. It implies superiority: which is what men are accused of doing to women.
I have been discriminated against and treated unfairly by my gender and races other than my own. I am neither white or male, but I can "pass" and as I am of indiscriminate lineage, I don't usually think it bc of my race.

The absolute worst people that I worked for have been female bosses, on more than one occasion they have been personally cruel, demeaning and unfair. So, while the males in my family are happy to work for women, I am not.

Which leads to my personal, but heartfelt opinion that we should not judge on a gender/race basis, but as individuals. As women, we seem to have acquired A Voice; now we should use it judiciously or we will become the very thing that we abhor.
(P.s. thanks, Sally, now, I think that I will head to the flower showFlowers...It is difficult to have grown up in truly limiting circumstances bc of gender/race, seen the progress made by both sexes(/race) and now see the outrage at relatively minor things compared to the bold lines of discrimination and harassment my mother and I indured decades ago when women were considered loose if they worked or only had a few accepted occupations. My daughter believes in herself and her capabilities and her life IS easier than her brother and father, we need to be thoughtful bc we all love our children and men are sons.)

Pumperthepumper · 10/03/2018 16:45

Except, of course, when they are called chavs, which even you agree is "too far".

I don't want to come across all "what about the..." but white lower class males AND females are highly discriminated against and sneered at and called things like "chavs". This is often based on their perceived intelligence.

I don’t understand your point here, sorry. It’s an absolute fact that women are worse off than men. It’s an absolute fact that people who are not white are worse off that people who are white. I’ve already said I don’t agree with the word ‘chav’ and explained why.

If the meme wasn’t sexist, if it wasn’t aimed at women on IWD, then what’s the joke?

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