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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Can we talk about Mothers Day flowers and whether I'm being mean

162 replies

DoesanyoneplaytheXylophone · 07/03/2018 10:32

I'm not a fan of Mothers Day. I don't need or want one "special" day to be shown how loved/appreciated I am - I expect that on a regular basis!

MIL, on the other hand, expects a bouquet of flowers delivered to her door on the day. We live 3 hours away and can't visit then so it usually costs about £50 for (judging by the photos MIL sends) a rather mediocre display of flowers.

WIBU to suggest DH sends her a £20 M&S voucher and asks her to treat herself?

OP posts:
MrsKoala · 09/03/2018 14:21

If your DH puts £1 a week in a jar he'll have the money for the flowers and it wouldn't seem like as much of a cost at once. He could then get himself a half with the leftover 2 quid - everyone's a winner!

GreatDuckCookery6211 · 09/03/2018 14:21

Of course you don't like her OP. Which is fine but at least own the fact girlfriend Wink

Original poster
DoesanyoneplaytheXylophone · 09/03/2018 14:22

Flowers PoorYorrick - stop frothing and get into the sunshine. And if it's not sunny where you are then do something to calm yourself down.

OP posts:
IhatePipArcher · 09/03/2018 14:26

Have you cancelled the cheque yet, OP? Wink

PoorYorick · 09/03/2018 14:27

Is that all you've got, OP? "Frothing" and "girlfriend"? You're like a crap American sitcom. I want my money back.

Anyway, if you don't like 'frothing', perhaps stop starting threads and disparaging strangers' marriages just because your husband buys flowers for his mother on Mothers' Day.

I'll admit I'm jealous about the sun you said you were off to enjoy 10 minutes ago, though. Cold as crap here and I'm stuck indoors anyway until the toddler wakes up.

Hillarious · 09/03/2018 14:36

But just think what you could buy for £50! Cut flowers are such a waste of £50. But then, I don't have money to burn. I hope I never become that person who thinks a present isn't good enough.

Unfortunately, OP, it looks like you might have backed yourself into a corner on this.

anneoneill · 09/03/2018 15:50

I think OP's learned about passive-aggression from her MIL.

StellaWouldYouTakeMeHome · 09/03/2018 16:11

I’ve sent my Mum a card and a small cuddly toy (of an animal that we both have a love for) she was delighted. Depends on the person really

Iwantamarshmallow · 09/03/2018 17:41

Actually I think your MIL is BU. I think it's very rude to ask for a particular gift especially such an exspensive one. If you share your finances with DH then you have every right not to want to spend £50 on flowers. Discuss it with your DH I think a £20 voucher is reasonable.

Thedogsmells · 10/03/2018 11:22

I don't think you are being unreasonable OP. Your MAIL sounds very childish and all about appearances tbh.

luckylavender · 30/03/2026 14:44

DoesanyoneplaytheXylophone · 07/03/2018 10:32

I'm not a fan of Mothers Day. I don't need or want one "special" day to be shown how loved/appreciated I am - I expect that on a regular basis!

MIL, on the other hand, expects a bouquet of flowers delivered to her door on the day. We live 3 hours away and can't visit then so it usually costs about £50 for (judging by the photos MIL sends) a rather mediocre display of flowers.

WIBU to suggest DH sends her a £20 M&S voucher and asks her to treat herself?

You can get decent displays for far less than that. I use Bloom and Wild

GnotherGnu · 31/03/2026 08:19

I expect OP's sorted this one out by now, given that it was eight years ago.

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