AIBU to be NEVER speak to SIL again?

[MadSister1818]

DB and SIL came to stay with their 2 DCs 5 and 2.

After they had gone, I noticed my old bear was missing. Looked high and lo but nothing.

Spoke to DB earlier and asked about my bear. Turns out the 5yo had taken a shine to it and asked SIL if she could take it. SIL SAID YES!!!

To make it worse, she only went and bloody lost it on the way home

I’ve had this bear since I was a baby. It was my most trusted companion and confidant throughout my childhood. DB knows this. But he was laughing whilst being apologetic about the whole thing.

I know I’m overreacting and it was just an accident but I am SO upset.

AIBU to never speak to SIL again? (Obviously I will through gritted teeth but right now I feel like having a full on tantrum).

Hello OP! It's a long shot but an old looking teddy was posted on the Herne Bay Chatter Facebook group a couple of days ago, he was a sort of dusky pink, could he be yours?

Captain - might be an idea to PM the OP - even if she's namechanged and/or abandoned this thread, a PM will still find her. :)

I haven't seen it posted elsewhere, but take a look at this website, and upload a picture if you can find one. Lost & Found Teddies

But yes, all over the local facebook pages between your and your "D"B's house, and that of the shopping centre too.

Fingers crossed OP - I hope you find him!

Well I wouldn't never speak to her again over it but I'd be so annoyed as well. I have a bear called Billy who I've had since I was 7 aswell, DS sleeps with him now

Oh. Your poor bear. Hope he shows up.

Just wanted to come back to this thread to thank everyone who has pm’d me, and to posters here who have been so kind and helpful.

Unfortunately there isn’t anything to report, we have put out signs/fb/etc but nothing. I don’t want to put any links on here as I am concerned about it being outing, even though I have NC’d for this thread, I know from experience that there are some super sleuths out there who would be able to work out my other usernames if I give too much info that might connect the dots!

But thank you for all the support. Means a lot.

Has your sil had the decency to grovel/apologise yet?

OMG , what is WRONG with people!!! What sort of person would just take somebody's cherished childhood possession - who would even have the cheek to ask if they could, let alone just go off with it and then mention it afterwards. That is so entitled, the mind boggles.

I would make sure they were totally clear on how furious you are OP. Unacceptable.

Parents who don't say no to their kids when they ask if they can keep other peoples stuff annoy me no end though in general. My SiL actually complained to my brother who then had the cheek to try and guilt my mother for his son crying "all the way home" because she told him he had to leave a particular toy at her house and not take it home with him (she kept toys at hers for the GC to play with when they called)

Have just caught up on this, hopefully through Facebook and the posters bear will turn up.

I'd be thinking twice before allowing them to stay again. Has the SIL even phoned to grovel? I'm angry on your behalf

I would be so angry I'm not sure I could restrain myself, that is worse than taking something with high monetary value. Don't let that thieving woman back in your house!

So sorry, MadSister1818. I hoped they'd find it. Thinking of you.

OP. Have your bro and SIL made any effort whatsoever to find your bear i.e. revisiting their journey, contacting places? Or has it been you doing it all? I would be so fucking angry with them. Firstly for letting their child take the bear and secondly for being so fucking cavalier about losing it.

Oh OP I hope it turns up

Sadly I am realising just how utterly self absorbed, and what arseholes, B & SIL are from their attitude towards this whole thing.

I always knew they were dicks, but I used to make excuses for them because parenthood is stressful etc, and because their lives are much more “important” than mine as B is a high earner in comparison to my pretty modest salary.

But no, not only have they not apologised properly, or made any real attempts to find my bear, they think I’m making an unnecessary fuss over a soft toy. They are honestly baffled and believe that I am the unreasonable one, and that I need to grow up.

You can’t argue with fucking narcissistic stupid.

(((((((Madd Hugs)))) MadSister1818.

MadSister1818

If you felt like sending them a link to this thread...they deserve to read it. They're disgraceful and will raise horribly spoilt children, unfortunately

OP, have been thinking a lot about you and your situation for the past few days. I hope you find your bear x

It's not about the bear, it doesn't matter what the object is. They stole something from you.

What horrible, entitled people!

I think you need to calm down and weigh up if the bear is more important than your family.

It wasn't malicious, if it was not in your room she probably didn't think twice if the dc was having a melt down.

Things happen, think of all the happy times you had with bear and don't overreact.

Note, I am not at all sentimental, so I know I may sound harsh, life has taught me things can be replaced, people can't xx

I think you should post a link to this, OP. If they're self-absorbed, they'd probably read it. When they realise that there's near-unanimous condemnation of what they've done, it might make them examine their attitudes.

And, if they are reading, they are selfish, presumptuous people with no respect for others and are bringing their children up to be the same.

ifanciedanamechange if They valued family They would be out looking for that fucking Bear.

The bear IS fucking important to the OP. End Of !

ifancied

You sound like my SIL.

OMG! are you my SIL?!