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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Colleague left me stranded in the snow

469 replies

pissedoffnurse101 · 02/03/2018 16:42

Work alongside a colleague, I currently have no car and have been one of the only few people to get into work with all this bad snow. Today, we got the go ahead to go home and she has dropped me off to the closest train station. There is one train showing up as running in the opposite direction, no staff here at the station and no one available to collect me.

AIBU to think she could have driven the 20 minutes to drop me home (she has a 4x4)???

OP posts:
GnotherGnu · 03/03/2018 22:48

Bertrand, you are ignoring the question where you would draw the line in terms of offering lifts. When you work 5 minutes away from your house, would you really spend an hour or more driving a colleague home?

BertrandRussell · 03/03/2018 23:39

“When you work 5 minutes away from your house, would you really spend an hour or more driving a colleague home?”

Normally? Probably not. In the weather we’ve had over the past week? Absolutely. Without question.

sycamore54321 · 04/03/2018 00:27

Both good Samaratain options - driving the OP home, or just waiting to see if she got the train - have downsides beyond just inconvenience to the driver. If the weather is worsening, and in big storms it can worsen quickly, conditions could deteriorate rapidly on the road and the difference in delaying the colleague's own departure time home by a 15 minute wait at the station could be significant. And expecting the driver to change from a 5 minute commute on roads familiar to her, to a 40 minute drive, means 9 times longer for the driver to get home. Add in the fact that the conditions cause massive delays and the driver's 5 minute commute home could have been extended to maybe 15 or 30 in bad weather, but the same delays would mean 135 or 270 minutes commute for the driver. That's maybe four and a half hours for the driver, almost all on possibly unfamiliar roads. Still sound good to you all?

Plus as everyone has said, she believed the OP to be safely on the train!

Op you are beyond unreasonable.

FloraFox · 04/03/2018 00:51

Lots of speculation there sycamore but I agree with Bertrand and I would not have left the OP alone at the station in this weather. Even if your perfect storm of consequences might have happened.

user1485778793 · 04/03/2018 01:10

If you don't like waiting around sort yourself out. You're an adult aren't you?

I'm also pregnant but haven't expected special treatment in this weather.

Clandestino · 04/03/2018 06:28

I am all for being kind to each other but reading OPs replies, they stink of cheeky fuckerism. Pregnant or not - if you want the comfort of a car, bloody get your own! Even a 5 minute journey can become 1 or 2 hours in bad weather. You are responsible for checking the transport schedule and availability. If they're problematic, get yourself a taxi. Nobody should sort these things for you.

Nikephorus · 04/03/2018 07:12

“When you work 5 minutes away from your house, would you really spend an hour or more driving a colleague home?”

Normally? Probably not. In the weather we’ve had over the past week? Absolutely. Without question.
Really? Gee, I'd have driven them back to mine and called a taxi from there. Result - I'm home safe, they're safely on their way home with someone who drives for a living. Job done. But then I'm not a martyr.

GnotherGnu · 04/03/2018 07:32

I seriously question whether you would have taken her Bertrand - given that, as pp have said, it's a route you don't know, you could get stuck anywhere and a 20 minute journey was regularly taking people a couple of hours or more. And would you have taken her "without question" if you had other obligations at home?

OliviaStabler · 04/03/2018 07:51

I would have liked to know how the op had actually planned to get home in the first place? Sounds to me like she expected a lift and was pissed off when it did not get offered. She was then stuck at the train station without a back up plan and then got angry.

Ninabean17 · 04/03/2018 07:56

When I was 30 weeks pregnant I walked, daily, up a hill with a 41° incline. Sometimes it was snowing. Never asked for a lift because I'm lucky enough to have two fully working legs and it's no one else's job to get me home. You sound very entitled op, and clearly aren't listening to anybody on here. It wasn't your colleagues fault.

taybert · 04/03/2018 08:37

I probably wouldn’t have given you a lift home. I hate driving in the snow, it’s stressful and dangerous and I’ve been actually stuck for hours before- my priority would’ve been to get home and safe as soon as possible. I would’ve driven you to my house though, where you could’ve waited for a lift or a taxi or even stayed if you’d needed to.

BertrandRussell · 04/03/2018 10:02

"When I was 30 weeks pregnant I walked, daily, up a hill with a 41° incline. Sometimes it was snowing. Never asked for a lift because I'm lucky enough to have two fully working legs and it's no one else's job to get me home."

Did someone use the term "martyr" earlier? Grin

Appuskidu · 04/03/2018 10:10

Did someone use the term "martyr" earlier? grin

That’s hardy being a martyr!! More like taking responsibility for your own journey to and from work, like, erm...you know, an adult does.

LexieBec · 04/03/2018 10:28

Rolled my eyes reading through this. To add to what everyone else has said. Yes! YABU..except if you were 6 yr old & said colleague was your mum.

1099 · 04/03/2018 10:57

Am I the only one not able to make the maths work on this one, OPs original post was at 1642, from which it appears she was still at the station, then update at 1814 says she is now safely home. Later update 1920 says she waited an hour for a train to next station (doesn't say how long journey takes) then 10 minutes waiting for a connecting train (doesn't say how long journey takes) then a 40 minute walk home. this is at least 1 hr 50 mins, plus actual time on trains. and yet she was posting from home, 1hr 32mins after original post.

LimonViola · 04/03/2018 11:12

1099

Good catch.

I feel very silly now for taking it seriously. Can't believe it's devolved into sixteen pages. I'm not convinced that the OP is actually talking about what actually happened, or whether it happened at all now.

Whisky2014 · 04/03/2018 11:16

Yeh it's a load of shit. Good old Bert has probably driven through the snowmake sure OP is ok though :D

GabsAlot · 04/03/2018 11:23

shes done a weeks worth of shit driving in this weather dropped u off at a station but you stil think shes out of order

why didnt u drive to hers or work in the morning leave your car there then could have got home yourself

GabsAlot · 04/03/2018 11:24

hmm 1099 yes timings dont add up

RosieRuby · 04/03/2018 11:42

I think your colleague was perfectly reasonable, why would you expect her to go so far out of her way for you in the snow!

Freshme · 04/03/2018 12:11

1099,

I also wondered that but decided that OP has massively exaggerated the times to make it worth the AIBU, without realising that broadcasting live makes it easy to see how long the journey actually took.

MadMags · 04/03/2018 13:21

I think anyone who believes this claptrap has snow fever...

sycamore54321 · 04/03/2018 13:25

@1099 I thought the numbers not great too but they make sense if at least part of the hour-long wait at the station occurred before she posted for the first time. Which isn't impossible.

Anyway I do hope it's trolling and nobody is as ungrateful and self-centred as the OP.

PrudenceThePlonker · 04/03/2018 14:02

Today one of my colleagues texted and told me someone was being a total bitch online because I didn't take her all the way home after a tediously long irritating day at work, and then she got inconvenienced by the notoriously run rail company. Somehow, apparently, it was MY FAULT; I'm clearly to blame for not suggesting her equally entitled family didn't drive 35 minutes each way to come and fetch her. Mmmm... Thing is, I was going to offer her a lift all the way home, 35 + 35 mins on a sunny day, but she was FAR SAFER GOING ON THE TRAIN, because another 5 minutes in the car with her and I would have bleedin strangled her.

Don't worry too much about her timings @freshme and @1099, the 40 minutes wait was also a gross exaggeration Confused

{nice long sigh}

DancesWithOtters · 04/03/2018 14:21

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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