To be refusing to travel in the snow tomorrow?

[BoyMeetsWorld]

So tomorrow we are meant to be driving 4 hours across country to get the ferry abroad to a very special birthday party of DHs family.

I understand why it's so important to him.

But the roads outside are literally lethal and the forecast tomorrow is worse.

We would be travelling with 2 small children.

DH is adamant that I'm being ridiculous...that we are driving out of the bad weather and it's much better over in Dover, plus we'll be on mostly motorways.

I keep saying he can't account for other drivers, the kids are going to freeze if there are ferry delays or motorway accidents and overall I just think it's bloody dangerous. My mum's begging us not to go.

Obviously I support him going if he really feels he must. But I really really don't want the children- and therefore me - to go.

AIBU ?

And I realise neither of those motorways will be near you, but the principle is the same; the roads are currently bad and are going to get worse so you should not travel unless you absolutely have to.

We have bloody awful weather right now and your DH is a classic example of the knobheads who insist on going out and then wonder why they get stuck/delayed/into an accident. If he truly doesn't give a shit about his own safety - or yours or your children's, then he presumably won't care in the slightest that if he gets into trouble he is relying on the emergency services putting themselves in danger to come and rescue you?

Well what are you going to do then? Stand there fighting over the DC in the morning? I guess as you showed him the thread you can't hide their passports now.......

His grans 100th? Is she likely to not make next weekend? In which case - no, even then I would not go.

I would make time before the end of the month. The snow is only likely to last a few days more!

I didn't think I'd be "the one" 🙈 Sorry.

Look at the weather forecasts properly and assess later/early?

Yabu. 10 people have sadly died due to this weather. I wouldnt risk dd. I didnt even take her out 10 minutes walk to my local town. Dh normally likes to go somewhere at the weekend hes saying no where this weekend.

We missed OH Grans 95th Birthday (and it was her last one) because DS had been hospitalised on the Thursday with a serious chest infection. He came out but it was not worth the risk to take him. Sadly we never got a chance to see her again but everyone understood in the circumstances it wasnt the right decision it was the ONLY decision (and still the right one)

Will the ferries even be running?

Tell him to go by himself. He can sit on the motorway and struggle to the port to get to a ferry that may not be sailing anyway.

Would a 4WD have helped those stuck on the motorway in Scotland last night? Surely if the road's blocked with vehicles it's blocked and you're not going anywhere no matter what you're driving?

I think it's really hard when you have to make these kinds of decisions, but if the special birthday is for someone close to him, I'd expect them to not to want you all travelling either.

His Grandmother, let him make the trip.
Right now, he is only listening to what he wants to hear.

You stay at home with your children, safe and warm.
You know, like a responsible parent should do in these circumstances.

What is the current state of the route you will be travelling? What are the conditions in the country you are travelling to? What is the advice from your local police force?.

In Cornwall, we're being asked not to travel, even though the snow isn't deep because we are a very hilly county and every crash is causing the emergency services a nightmare.

We are due to travel 95 miles down the county for a wedding on Saturday. I was adamant we'd make it; now I'm not so sure.

Could you go Saturday instead? Forecast for parts of the South looks to improve on Saturday although I appreciate that could change.

I have a 4x4 they don't defy the laws of physics as a pp said. They will slip, slide and get stuck in a traffic jam. Check local police advice in your area and the area you are going to and follow it.

Sorry but he's being eithet arrogant or naive about it. At best a lorry will Jack knife somewhere ahead of you and you'll be stuck freezing in a car with two kids for hours and hours. And many worse things are likely. No way in hell I would do it and I'm not at all risk averse (adventure sports etc). It's all due to hit big time tomorrow morning.....have you looked at the detailed weather reports? On his own with blankets, battery power packs, flask of jot drink, full tank of petrol, yes ok if he must. But with you and the dc? No way.

it's not 4 hours, more like 2..

Neighbour came home today...3 hr journey normally...took her 9 hours.

Tell him to risk his own life, i am sure his gm would be horrified he risked his kids for her party.

It’s must taken me 6 hours to do a 40 minute journey.

It’s likely to take me 6 hours back as well. I only did it because it was for an essential (like formally) essential thing

Absolutely I wouldn’t take the kids - he can go on his own if he wants to

if we set off very early in a 4x4 it may be ok

MAY being the operative word here. What if its not? What if some car ploughs into you? What if road is closed due to an accident? Whats he gonna tell the kids as you sit freezing on a motorway for hours?

What an arrogant idiot.

He's being selfish, you're being sensible. I would refuse to go and refuse to let him take the kids. As pp said go next weekend perhaps, hopefully she will hang on. It's not like you're banning him from going.
I'm meant to be seeing my gran this weekend, reluctantly I'm having to cancel because, y'know, safety and being a grown up etc!

If he does go tell him to take the M20 and not the M2, it is clear and the M2 has had real problems,and the ferries are still running right now.

And this website is great www.trafficengland.com

Outside my house in Kent on a Tuesday morning and we have had more snow since then. I wouldn’t travel. To gauge what it’s like, maybe look on the Kent School Closure website to see weather local schools are closed.

P&O ferries currently have a 90 minute delay and the storm hasn't really hit yet.

Police saying not to travel.

20 car pile ups

People stuck in cars on motorways (M80) for 9 hours, running out of fuel for heat, nothing to eat or drink.

Husband says to travel, I think I'd follow the advice of the Police.

This is on twitter:

Cumbria, Northumbria, South Wales, South West England and areas under Amber/Red warnings. Do NOT attempt to travel overnight unless absolutely essential. Roads are treacherous, you are at high risk of either being stranded or in standstill traffic.

I think that is self explanatory.

Could you call your in-laws now and apologise that you won't make it. Tell them that your dh will decide whether he wants to risk it in the morning but you simply can't take your children out in such conditions. Then tell your dh that you've canceled for yourself and the kids.

Oh don't worry InvisibleUnicorn - I asked for advice! Genuinely wasn't sure if I was being paranoid as I'm an anxious traveller even in normal conditions, so if everyone had cone back saying I was being OTT I wanted to know.

At the moment he's agreed to see what it's like at 6am but has made me pack and says if there's no incidents on the motorways at that time and he checks the roadmaps and they look ok, we are going. Trouble is, his version of looking ok is definitely not the same as mine...no roads are looking ok to me at the moment!!

Short of flat out refusing to let him take the children which he may well never forgive me for, I don't think there's anything I can do to get him to see sense. I thoight about asking his mum (my MIL) to see if she'd back me but I've got a nasty feeling she'd agree with him. Not sure though.