Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Stalked online for my house value by new love interest

126 replies

Smile1978 · 25/02/2018 23:31

Met on the face of it a good guy IRL ,shared interest and outlook.Taken aback as this evening had a telephone call usual stuff discussed then randomly they said the houses where you live are worth £xx when I checked on Zoopla.Taken aback I said are they ? and tried to laugh it off by saying hmm cyber stalk ,he kept pushing the point on what the value of my home may be ! .Is it me or this is odd behaviour not to mention the gold digger element ? .For background this follows on from a conversation a few days prior that they randomly said you must earn £xx and the payments on this place must be at least £ xx PCM .I know I have been out of the dating scence for what seems and age but is thIs the new norm for a potential suitor to bring into a conversation?

OP posts:
DalekDalekDalek · 25/02/2018 23:33

That would be setting alarm bells ringing for me tbh.

Tinkofhousepan · 25/02/2018 23:33

That is super weird

fuzzywuzzy · 25/02/2018 23:35

Does he earn significantly less than you?
Is his house worth less?

It is odd to check out someone’s house price on zoopla.

Sarsparella · 25/02/2018 23:35

That’s really bloody weird & would put me right off him

Why are you calling him they? Confused

Queenoftheblitz · 25/02/2018 23:35

It's odd that he's being so upfront about his research although I kind of admire his honesty.
If he was a gold digger he wouldn't be revealing all this to you.
Maybe he wants to know that you're solvent?
I find his candour quite refreshing.

PrincessHairyMclary · 25/02/2018 23:36

Unless he is an estate agent or something then I'd say it's pretty weird.

Smile1978 · 25/02/2018 23:37

From what he has said to me as I have not asked.He lives in a social housing flat.Appreciate the replies

OP posts:
Idontdowindows · 25/02/2018 23:37

Run. Don't walk, run.

MyBrilliantDisguise · 25/02/2018 23:38

I knew a bloke like this and he was very controlling. You need to make a sharp exit.

Having said that, on Right Move, which he's probably been scrutinising, then it says the purchase price (if it was recent), what it's worth now and what a mortgage would be on that amount. It's all there, but a) he didn't need to look it up and b) he didn't need to tell you he'd looked it up.

Smile1978 · 25/02/2018 23:40

Only on assumption I would believe he earns less than me ,but driving atop of the range new sports car and quite showy.This is real early days not even a week of knowing him.

OP posts:
coconutpie · 25/02/2018 23:41

He lives in social housing and drives a top of the range sports car???

MyBrilliantDisguise · 25/02/2018 23:43

Too many red flags, OP.

frasier · 25/02/2018 23:44

Definitely weird.

Trust your instincts OP.

Queenoftheblitz · 25/02/2018 23:46

Op you should follow his lead and delve into his finances - he can hardly complain can he?

MyKingdomForBrie · 25/02/2018 23:47

He shouldn’t be in social housing if he’s earning well enough for that car..? If you actually mean top of the range you’re talking 100k value.

Weird, I would definitely swerve.

butterfly56 · 25/02/2018 23:53

Not even a week and he's already digging into your financial situation.
The guy sounds like a materialistic jerk!
Drop him like a hot potato!

HelpTheTigers · 25/02/2018 23:53

It's odd that he even thought that it was an ok thing to do and say. Run for the hills OP.

bastardkitty · 25/02/2018 23:55

Block and move on. That's not okay.

ItsAllABitStrangeReally · 25/02/2018 23:56

I'm terrible for online stalking.

I've even been known to Google street view the address of eBay buyers.......no reason, I'm just chronically nosy Blush

GUMBYMUMBY · 25/02/2018 23:57

What a total wanker with a sports car.
Having lived in social housing in Reigate I would say:
Absolute 1st class drug dealer behaviour.

AtomHeart · 25/02/2018 23:58

Why are you asking? Of course he is a weirdo!

esk1mo · 25/02/2018 23:59

omg, alarm bells.

block him.

Queenoftheblitz · 26/02/2018 00:00

Social housing doesnt work that way. He may have been granted the flat when he was earning far less in the past.
You don't have the flat taken off you because your earnings improve.
But I read that you may have to pay the market rental if your wages increase.
I would definitely house stalk someone if I was dating them. I want to know everything I can about them.
I just wouldn't tell him what I'd done.

SteamyBeignets · 26/02/2018 00:02

Social housing flat and showy? Loser with a capital L. Run!

Summercat · 26/02/2018 00:36

Block and move on. This is super weird behaviour! Shock

Swipe left for the next trending thread