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AIBU?

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Original poster

So, I'm one of 'those' mums...

380 replies

Tootsings · 22/02/2018 21:57

I worship the ground my DS walks on and I don't know how to stop myself Blush

I watched a video titled "To the love of my son's life" in Facebook - basically an emotional video with emotion prodding music, telling the mysterious girl or boy that I'm doing my best to make him into a lovely young man. One day he will want to spend his days off work with you, will want to spend time with you blah blah, but right now he needs and wants me".

Goes on to say how proud I will be on the wedding day and how I promise to love you too, for you are the person he's chosen, etc etc

I watched the video crying and then felt a sudden rage that one day someone would be stealing my DS from me!

One day I won't be the only woman in his life! (Providing he's straight)

Another woman will fill his heart with love Angry

Is this how those MIL threads come about, from horrendous mums like me? Blush

I think I'm a bit obsessed. I iron his vests and feel slight guilt if he's forced to wear one I haven't ironed. Even if you can't see it under his immaculately ironed things.

How do I get a grip?

I tell DH I can't have any more children, in terrible fear they won't live up to my magical DS and his amazing charms and looks.

I realise I must be quite unhinged but at least I have the good grace to admit it... I think

OP posts:
Incywincyteenyweeny · 22/02/2018 22:42

I have one ds and I do believe the saying ‘your sons your son until he takes a wife a Daughter is a daughter all your life’ is true and it terrifies me.
But I think I’m going to try and go the other way and welcome future dils because as difficult as it must be if you interfere too much in an adult sons life I think you would end up pushed out. I’d really want to be involved with grandchildren aswell so know I would hate to be frozen out for being ‘interfering’.

Original poster
Tootsings · 22/02/2018 22:43

My DS is mostly just a scream bag too, now he's teething. But my God, I can't help but count down the minutes to that next smile, that next calming feed with just me and him, no one else

Becoming a Mum is the best decision I've ever made. And the hardest too, it's like he has my heart in his hand and could crush it at any minute of his choosing...

And I've never let any male do that to me before

OP posts:
gillybeanz · 22/02/2018 22:43

I was a like you, then the teen years came.
They are nasty for a reason during these years, nature is very clever.
When he is ready to leave you believe me you'll be glad.
It's good to find you've raised your son to be independant, loveable and able to make somebody happy.

sunnyshowers · 22/02/2018 22:44

But ps...those musing s actually make me love them more.
You love each differently but equally..
When my 3 gang up on is or share a joke...I get goosebumps...it's magical.

Threeminis · 22/02/2018 22:45

Haven't read the full thread so possibly echoing other posters....

Give it a couple of years. Then, come back to this thread.

RoyalBelum · 22/02/2018 22:45

until one day you hear yourself say STOP BLOODY KISSING ME

We love them really, but dear god they taste your patience.

RoyalBelum · 22/02/2018 22:47

‘your sons your son until he takes a wife a Daughter is a daughter all your life’
complete nonsense. It might become true if you are the MIL from hell though!

Charolais · 22/02/2018 22:47

You should hope that one day your son meets a woman who 'fills his heart with love'. As a mother of adult men I know this sadly is not always the case.

CeeCeeMacFay · 22/02/2018 22:49

Feeling abit Confused at all the women thinking loving your son makes you weird, especially when so many women are very close to their mothers. I admit I adore my ds (16) and can’t imagine anyone loving him like I do. He does however have a girlfriend who is so lovely I could adopt her and I am glad she makes him happy.

Sparklingbrook · 22/02/2018 22:49

‘your sons your son until he takes a wife a Daughter is a daughter all your life’

What a load of cobblers.

Tmgc123 · 22/02/2018 22:49

How the F do you have time to iron vests with a four month old?!?

acornsandnuts · 22/02/2018 22:49

I feel un rationally angry at all these posts. I have a very over bearing and obsessive MIL and I can see where it all began. DH struggles with surprise visits at work and pop ups when we are on holiday. Arhggggg

RoyalBelum · 22/02/2018 22:50

Feeling abit confused at all the women thinking loving your son makes you weird,
No one is saying that, have you actually read the thread?

happy2bhomely · 22/02/2018 22:52

Tootsings After my absolutely perfect, light of my life, firstborn son, I went on to have another son and 3 daughters.

I can promise you that I fell in love with each of them in exactly the same way. I didn't think my heart could ever love any more than it did, and then I had more dc and it's like I grew an extra whole heart for each of them! My love is not shared. It grows to fill a space that wasn't there before. I don't know how it is possible but it is.

Don't listen to all the posters talking about horrible teens. They don't become any less precious. Mine is 6ft, hairy and sometimes smelly. He is still my absolute pride and joy.

TheXXFactor · 22/02/2018 22:53

Wait till he tells you in forensic detail about everything he has done on Minecraft and everything some YouTuber has done on Minecraft.

Until then, enjoy Smile

Original poster
Tootsings · 22/02/2018 22:53

How the F do you have time to iron vests with a four month old?!?

Either whilst he's sleeping or when DH is home from work

I just sat and thought about being really mean to a lovely DIL, and in truth, I can't imagine it when I really think of it. I'd probably want to smother her with my love and help too. I just hope they will both tell me when to F off in case I stay somewhat unhinged and don't realise I'm being annoying Blush

OP posts:
Jenala · 22/02/2018 22:54

It might fade a bit when he's running around refusing a nappy change and has shit down his legs. Or is screaming BUT I WANT IT when you are driving down the motorway and he's realised he left his blue duplo block with the number 2 on at home. Etc.

Don't worry. I remember a fleeting moment of sadness at the thought of some other female getting my son's love. It's silly though, when that happens we don't lose everything and our son's gain everything.

Ironing any of his clothes his vests is odd though OP. You got me there.

RhodaBorrocks · 22/02/2018 22:55

Bless you OP, youre in the pfb stage Grin

My DS is fast becoming a stinky tween, who alternately worries he'll never get married and will have to live with me forever, then declares he'll never choose to get married and will stay with me forever.

I joke with him that when he's 18 I'll only be 43 and I'm going travelling, so he's on his own! Grin

Jenala · 22/02/2018 22:55

We don't lose anything that should have read

Original poster
Tootsings · 22/02/2018 22:55

happy2 that's a beautiful thing to say Thanks I hope you get spoiled written this Mother's Day

OP posts:
LokiBear · 22/02/2018 22:55

Oh he's only 4 months, you are still full of crazy hormones. It will normalize! I didn't want my dd going to a child minder for the same reason. Nursery have a range of staff so she couldnt get too attached up one person so I was okay with that! As they get older and start to be more separate from you the crazy dies down.

Original poster
Tootsings · 22/02/2018 22:55

*rotten!

OP posts:
Sparklingbrook · 22/02/2018 22:56

I would quit ironing vests TBH. No point in doing that, the baby won't remember. Grin

Have a relax and a Brew instead, or a sleep.

Otistheowl · 22/02/2018 22:56

My 4 year old ds sat me down and told me he doesn't want to marry me anymore when he grows up. Broke my heart :(

Turns out he wants to marry his new baby sister, because she'll need someone to look after her 💖

Original poster
Tootsings · 22/02/2018 22:58

Spark I'm constantly looking to do things so I won't take your well thought advice Blush I have to be doing something, anything.

My God, I think I'm more unhinged than I previously thought now...

OP posts:
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