Can *everything* be fit into the 6am-6pm working day?

[Whiskaspie]

And I mean everything bar putting dishwasher on after dinner and putting kids to bed. All house/food/bills/kids/garden/planning etc etc...if one were a sahp.

Yep, easy. I rarely do anything past 7pm (including bathing kids) and I work 3x12hr shifts a week on top. My house is clean, washing reasonably on top of, bills paid (thank you direct debit!) and kids fed and happy.

That’s how it works in our house certainly- both of us treat the evening once DS is in bed as complete downtime!

We’ve only got one 3 year old though. I’d imagine it’s a bit different if you have a load of toddlers and babies.

Also just echoing the confusion over banking and bill paying as a chore. I remember my mum doing a mysterious looking business with cheque books and statements and a calculator every month. Even she just has online banking and direct debits these days!

Who eats at 5 and has school aged children in bed by 6? Brownies and beavers etc are on a lot later than that

That aside yes

We both work full time and don’t do a whole lot when we get in from work, maybe an hour in the even8ng and a couple of hours each on the weekend. So I’m not sure what you would be doing for twelvex hours...other than actual kid care obvs.

my SIL used to do "childrens tea" at 4.30, and have the DC in bed by 6 when they were (young) school aged. Then she wondered why they were up bouncing around from 4.30 the next morning .

Mine can't be left alone long enough to get some of those things done and is unsafe to have in the same room whilst doing them. Using the hoover has to be done when he is in bed because he can't cope with the noise nearby.
It's probably possible with some children though.

Accepting I'm an usual case, banking features in my "out of hours" list as we get paid in one currency, spend in a second, DHs parents live in a place which uses a third currency, and we have a mortgage, rental income and save in a fourth. We are also very close to the border, and regularly spend money over there. We do actually spend quite a lot of time ensuring there is enough of the right stuff in the right place, and it's complicated and time consuming!
And for the sake of confusion, DS is travelling to a 6th place next week, and needs money for there too.
Plus, you know, any actual holidays. Our life is filled with exchange rates.

It depends on a lot of things - how much care the children need (are they babies, toddlers, SN?), whether the other occupants of the house do anything, or whether they constantly create more work, how many in the household (washing etc for 9 people is going to take longer than for two), whether you have any pets.

And children don't fit to nice neat timescales.

It also depends partly why you're asking - I'm going to go out on a limb and guess your dp thinks you should be able to do everything before he gets back, therefore he doesn't have to lift a finger?

Without children in the mix, or with school-age or laid back DC I would say 6-6 is definitely more than enough time to take care of everything, so it depends how much time/attention the children take up. And I'd also say that doesn't exempt other members of the household from helping out after 6 - childcare, washing up etc.

We have a 7-7 day here. After ds goes to bed at 7pm neither of us do anything unless there's some unusual extra job to be done. We only have one ds though and he naps for 2 hours at lunchtime. Dh also gets in at 4.30pm from work.

I'm a sahm . Mostly evenings are filled with ferrying some child somewhere tbh. Also usually Dh hangs the washing up for me.

“Today 07:29 CrabappleBiscuit

We both work full time and don’t do a whole lot when we get in from work, maybe an hour in the even8ng and a couple of hours each on the weekend. So I’m not sure what you would be doing for twelvex hours...other than actual kid care obvs.”

This^^ we do all the house work, cooking, household admin, car admin etc outside of working 8-6pm, so if someone is fully occupied looking after children during those hours why is it any different?

the OP does say everything BAR putting dishwasher on after dinner and putting kids to bed

so the kids aren't in bed by 6.

I would say that if you are being told you are not doing enough, you need to have words with your partner,

if you are telling your partner they are not doing enough, you need to remember that kids are not robots, they are unpredictable human beings and things cannot be scheduled like clockwork unless you have staff to pick up the slack.

I think I lot of you who are answering yes easily are not actually answering this for yourself - you really don't lift a finger apart from dishwasher and kids to bed after 6pm?? 6pm?? 8 maybe but there is no way everything in my house is wrapped up 1.5hrs before kids are in bed!
I often try to get things done before kids are in bed so I don't have to do it afterwards, but that is not 6pm

When you're at home with a child / children you have to do a lot more housework & food prep.

Dh and i manage 90%of everything within a 7am-7pm window. Up at 7am, out the door with the kids at 7.45am. Home 5.30pm, kids have 45mins tablet time while we do housework and chuck laundry in etc. 6.15 one of us sits with them while they bathe, the other preps mine and dhs dinner. 6.45 kids are in pjs and we read for 15 mins. Dd reads her schoolbook then we do a bedtime story while they eat a slice of toast. Bed at 7; dh and I have dinner straight after.

We dont do anything bar scrape our plates housewise after dinner. No laundry or cleaning etc.

We do a final tidy and a tidy up of the the kitchen after the children are in bed.

This thread has reminded me that I have to pay the garden waste bin!

Yes. I get most stuff done by 11:30-12 then start again with dinner, homework etc at 3. I do sometimes end up cooking in the evenings though due to activities.
I never know what admin/banking etc people do that takes ages. I renew insurance and utilities once a year, transfer money once a month and take out cash for school snack/dinners and kids pocket money once a month, pay a couple bills over the phone/online. None of these take very long, most are seconds. Yes there's an odd passport form and we've recently changed GP which required a few phone calls and six forms but I got DH and the older kids to do their own and these are not regular.

In theory yes.

The reality with small dcs is very different though. Even school aged ones.

I can blitz through my house in 3 hours. Thats all surfaces dusted, bathroom clean, all floors hoovered, hard floors mopped, laundry put away, a load of washing/drying on and bins emptied.

Then ds comes home from nursery and I start going around in circles. Dd comes home and the circles get a bit smaller, dp walks in and they get smaller still.

And you only need one thing to go wrong to knock your schedule off.

If the person asking you this wants to give it a try why not have them take a week off work, you leave the house when they would and return home at the same time with the same expectations?

Yes definately. I work 5 days a week and get up around 5.30, have 2dcs 8&2 I do everything, washing, dinners, packed lunches, swimming, walk dog. Some days I can’t be bothered but still get the basics done. It obviously depends on you and your children, my eldest helps me and does chores for pocket money. Dp works long hours but helps when he’s back. I don’t put youngest to bed till7 mind you

I found it hard to get stuff done when I had a baby and a toddler in the house. There was lots of feeding and going to the park and playing with toys. I found if I tried to do something like clean the bathroom the 2 year old would fall over or try and help and make it worse, then the baby would suddenly want a feed. My toddler was very curious and active and I found keeping him alive took up a lot of time.

I used to do a lot at the weekend when DH could take them out, or when they'd gone to bed. But I only did the mat leave as a stay at home mum -after that I worked 3 long days - maybe id have got better at it.

Most of it yes, but it depends how you organise your day, surely?

Yeah I do. Though I start a bit earlier (I’m a childminder) and my dh does more than his fair share but once we’re finished with dinner dishes that’s it really. Putting 7yo to bed at 7.30 then chill.

Depends on the kids.

if newborn twins, not a chance in hell.

if one four year old girl who enjoys solitary colouring and watching Disney films with headphones on, certainly

When I was a SAHM, DH got home around 5.30 so would entertain DCs/help with homework while I made dinner then help with bedtime and clearing up the kitchen before the rest of the evening was for us. Any unusual or ‘big’ tasks like mending something we would do on weekends.

I still don’t work a whole day every day so still try to get most things done before DH gets home so that the evening is ours. Of course that’s. I have easier now DD is at uni and DS is a teen.