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AIBU?

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Original poster

to have lost the will to live

406 replies

lovelystar · 18/02/2018 03:15

Someone please give me some advice or something, anything to take my mind of how fuming I am.

I am being induced tomorrow at 11am, boyfriend went for a pint with a friend, fine, said he'd be back by 12, fine, gives me a chance to bath/clean/chill.

It's now 3am he has just stumbled in absolutely steaming, rang the doorbell constantly, waking me up even though he had his keys on him. He's been sick in the bedroom/bathroom knocking everything over. To top it all off I'm now on the sofa as he's diagonal across the bed snoring his head off and he's far to heavy for me to move him.

You know any other night I may have found it slightly amusing and left him to it. I just wanted tonight of all nights to not be woken up and kept awake and having to get up early to clean up all his sick before I come home with the baby. He will be a nightmare to get up in the morning and I don't think I can face the dramatics and moodiness of him when I have to get up and go and have a baby.

Would I be a complete bitch if I left him to it and went and had the baby myself and made him regret it for a long time. Or is that a step too far? It's my first baby and a high risk pregnancy. Sorry for the rant it's early/late and I'm angry.

OP posts:
Rachie1986 · 18/02/2018 07:48

Hope you are ok OP and got some sleep. Hope today goes well - focus on you and your baby and leave him be to his hungover regret!

userabcname · 18/02/2018 07:50

He is an arse. I would be livid! Also he's stupid - hungover with a newborn?! Couldn't imagine anything worse. I would definitely make my own way to the hospital and leave him to sort himself out and clear up the mess. Make sure he is on night duty the first night with baby too - you will need to recover from the birth so all you should do is wake to feed if bfing or if ff then he can crack on by himself for a few hours. No excuses about being tired / hungover accepted!
Good luck with the induction!

speakout · 18/02/2018 07:51

I would go alone OP.

Seriously. Staff at my births have been amazing, and I found OH to be of limited use anyway.
Leave him to sleep and book a taxi.

Flomy · 18/02/2018 07:53

I would leave him a note to pack his bags. I really would.

Good luck today OP Flowers

LynetteScavo · 18/02/2018 07:54

Go in alone...it will be a while before the baby's born and he will have sobered up by then.

What a complete arse.

Tour · 18/02/2018 07:57

What an absolute idiot. I can’t think of any excuse for his behaviour. Good luck today OP.

speakout · 18/02/2018 07:57

I would leave him a note to pack his bags. I really would.

Yes me too.

It would be a deal breaker.

Beyond selfish. Even going out in the first place. OP must have been feeling anxious knowing she was going in to be induced the next day.
For her OH to go to the pub instead of staying at home and providing emotional support is beyond selfish.

I don't do knobhead partners.

ChangingStates · 18/02/2018 07:58

What a shit start to your induction day! I think in the state he's in you may be better off starting on your own. It will likely take a while before anything gets going so hopefully he won't have missed much by the time he sleeps it off and gets his arse in to the hospital, and will be better support for you because of the sleep.
I did the first few hours of my first labour and most of my second without DH there, for very different reasons, but it was fine. Have a friend on standby if you can.
Good luck

namechangerforthis123 · 18/02/2018 08:02
Thanks Hope it goes really well for you today OP!!!
NerrSnerr · 18/02/2018 08:08

I would go alone and wait for him to get his shit together and come in. I'm chilled about my husband going out but the night before planned induction is a joke- why wasn't he spending your last childfree night at home with you?

GeekyWombat · 18/02/2018 08:09

Good luck for today OP. Thinking of you!

Chugalug · 18/02/2018 08:12

Oh my god ,what a fucking man child..I'm so sorry he's so shit.have you a friend or relative who could go with you.leave the sick for him to clean up.leave him sleeping ,he won't be any use to you pissed or with a hangover ..good luck honey.come back on here and tell us how you get on xxx💐🌹🥀🌷🌸

ChasedByBees · 18/02/2018 08:13

Hope it goes well today. You need to focus on you and the baby. If he’s there you may feel annoyed / angry and you need the focus to not be on him. I would go without him.

He is a disgrace to put you in this position and leave you without sleep this night when you need to be relaxed and ready.

Personally I wouldn’t let him in at all even if took days.

speakout · 18/02/2018 08:14

OP this is your first baby.

This is the start of a huge difficult road for your poor OH.
He is in for a huge wake up call.

Ellie56 · 18/02/2018 08:14

What a twat. I would be raging and I wouldn't clean his puke up either. Angry

PerfectlySymmetricalButtocks · 18/02/2018 08:17

Don't clean up his sick. Leave a note saying you expect it to be clean when you get back with HIS baby.

kaytee87 · 18/02/2018 08:18

I'd actually ask him to leave. What a twat!

Good luck today op Thanks bet you can't wait to meet your wee one.

lostmyfeckingkeysagain · 18/02/2018 08:18

I'm not sure I could ever bring myself to forgive this to be honest.

Hope all goes well for you today OP Flowers

Crunchymum · 18/02/2018 08:19

I too am in the "tell him to pack his bags" camp.

I am an emetophobe so it does effect my judgement (someone making the choice to drink to point of puking is the height of selfishness to me!!) but in this case I really do think he has been completely out of line.

Inductions generally take a while and that is if they have room for you when you go in, so chances are nothing much is going to happen until he is sober and present. His behaviour would be unforgivable for me though.

How can someone behave this way at such an important time? No doubt he'll give you some bullshit about how stressed and worried he was and how he got carried away blah blah.

I feel sorry for you OP. He has done this at such a vulnerable time for you and leaves you little choice really? He probably knows deep down that as unacceptable his behaviour is, you have bigger things going on and most likely won't have the mental energy to deal with this.

Good luck and I hope this doesn't spoil your birth.

EllieMe · 18/02/2018 08:20

I suspect you will be going it all alone before long so get rid now. This man has no respect for you.

Pack his bags for him and go to hospital on your own.

speakout · 18/02/2018 08:20

Totally unforgivable OP.

I would go now, stop at a swanky place for breakfast on the way. Don't even leave a note.

NeedMoreSleepOrSugar · 18/02/2018 08:20

Good luck today op, try to focus on you and baby for now Flowers

hmmwhatatodo · 18/02/2018 08:20

Is there a backstory to all of this? If not, I’d say he was selfish for even going out at all

DartmoorDoughnut · 18/02/2018 08:21

What an absolute TWAT!!! Angry

Tell him the house better be fucking spotless when you and the baby get home! Hope everything goes smoothly Flowers

seven201 · 18/02/2018 08:23

What a selfish twit. Hope you got some rest and that the birth goes smoothly. Don't let your dp's actions get to you today; much more important and exciting things to think about.

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