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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Someone At Door 😣

413 replies

spagbol11 · 15/02/2018 19:15

It’s 19.13, I’ve just put 2yo dd to bed, done all my housework, been at work all day, so about to have a lovely hot bath and someone is knocking at my door, door is locked, not expecting anyone, my dp is working nights. AIBU not to answer or even check who it is...I’m scared

OP posts:
MadMags · 15/02/2018 19:43

If there’s a backstory it might have been helpful to mention it.

Because under normal circumstances it’s just odd for a grown adult to be “scared” at 7pm!

SerPants · 15/02/2018 19:44

Is there some kind of past trauma that's making you wary? I've known a couple of people feel the way you do- in one case because of a break in, the other a violent ex tracking her down.

A peep hole or video camera thing on the front door might be useful in the future.

LovingLola · 15/02/2018 19:44

So it would seem that you have some difficulty with a strange neighbour and you are concerned it might be her?
Why didn't you put that in your opening post?

Amyxmarie · 15/02/2018 19:44

gamerchick god squad- love it! Defo using that in future 😂

WizardOfToss · 15/02/2018 19:45

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Roussette · 15/02/2018 19:45

There are some weird people on Mumsnet. In real life I do not know a single person that would not just answer their door. On here loads of people won't answer even in day time. Really strange

^^ This.

I don't know one person either.

Get a chain fitted and a spyhole if you're that nervous about answering the door.

SaskaTchewan · 15/02/2018 19:46

To be fair, I know plenty of people like me, and there are many reasons why I wouldn't bother answering the door in RL:
I am in the bath bleaching my moustache
My little ones are in the bath
I am working from home and don't want to be disturbed
I am on the phone

Panicking about a knock at 7pm sounds a bit excessive

bimbobaggins · 15/02/2018 19:47

Scared????
What did the police say when you phoned to log it.?

CotswoldStrife · 15/02/2018 19:48

Even with a backstory, that's an unusual thing to ask the internet about (should I answer my own front door). Hope you are OK, OP.

supersop60 · 15/02/2018 19:49

I helped out with the Santa float last December, and there were a number of people who shouted through a closed door that they weren't going to open up because it was too late (um - 6.30pm and there was loads of people in hi-vis jackets with id, and loud christmas music and santa ho-ho-ho-ing)

bluebells1 · 15/02/2018 19:51

I can't believe this. Why would you not check on who it is? What if it was your neighbour looking for some help? Let's hope you are never in a position to knock on someone else's door.

frazzledtired · 15/02/2018 19:51

Give her a break! I also don't answer the door unless I know someone is calling round.

gamerchick · 15/02/2018 19:52

Ah is that this old lady who wants to monopolise your time and have you take her on mega shopping trips?

Yeah, don’t answer your door. How’s things going with her anyway?

Ickyockycocky · 15/02/2018 19:52

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

virtualreality · 15/02/2018 19:53

It has nothing to do with mumsnet.

If someone you know is trying to get in and they don't get an answer they will surely text/whatsapp/or call you.

Everyone else can go whistle in my book anyway. Usually looking for money or JWs or something like that. So yes I will ignore them.

Parcels are delivered to work/DPs work. The postie delivers bills etc through the letterbox.

Who else would I need to answer the door to pray tell?

WorraLiberty · 15/02/2018 19:53

Are you like this in Summer too OP, or is it the dark you're scared of?

Dermymc · 15/02/2018 19:54

713 is not late. How did we become so pathetic we won't answer the door?!

You know for some people actually calling round is the only way they'll contact you.

What about emergencies etc? Could be a child that is stuck?

Lilymossflower · 15/02/2018 19:54

I always get scared of the door knocking ! Wish I didn't. Think it's because as a child my parents taught me to be scared f the door knocking so I wouldn't open it to kidnappers. Anyway if t knocked now ide probably assume it was the neighbour asking for sugar and open it. Or not answer cause tbh they can learn to buy there own sugar. I would want to look through the looky through bit first though , but then wouldn't because that would mean they would have seen my shadow and know I was there so I wouldn't be able to ignore them anyway! Lol! Talk about door complexes....

UrsulaPandress · 15/02/2018 19:56

Our window cleaner has just knocked on.

Scary bastard.

Roussette · 15/02/2018 19:56

Who else would I need to answer the door to pray tell?

An emergency? A neighbour whose husband was having a stroke? A DCs friend who is in trouble? A friend who needs your help? Your sister who's car has broken down a mile away?

The list is endless.

I can't understand the isolationalists on MN. Don't get it at all.

YouTheCat · 15/02/2018 19:58

Dd had a bloke knock at 2.30pm last week. She opened the door and there he was with a box of assorted knives. She didn't wait to find out if he was selling them - she just shut the door and locked it.

If I was alone, it was dark and I wasn't expecting anyone I wouldn't answer the door either.

Chipsahoy · 15/02/2018 19:59

I'd be scared too, after past trauma. I don't answer the door to anyone after dark unless I'm expecting them, but a knock would definitely set me on edge if I was alone.
Why are people being so judgey and mean? People feel what they feel.

gamerchick · 15/02/2018 19:59

If any of you had the neighbour the OP has you wouldn’t open the door either.

frazzledtired · 15/02/2018 20:00

I'm with virtualreality

If it was a neighbour whose husband had had a stroke, they would be frantically knocking - of course I would then answer.

If my sister had broken down she would call me to say she was coming round.

I don't answer to anyone I don't know.

RavenLG · 15/02/2018 20:01

Why the fuck are you scared of the door?
How did we become so pathetic we won't answer the door?!

Why the fuck don't you brave souls think before you speak. Utter patronising twats.

Some people have anxiety to the point where a knock on the door can cripple you.
Some people have been broken into and are scared of answering the door to someone possibly scouting the house.
Some people are just have no confidence.
Get over yourself, it doesn't make people pathetic and it certainly doesn't make you a better person.

OP, don't answer the door if you don't want too.