Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Someone At Door 😣

413 replies

spagbol11 · 15/02/2018 19:15

It’s 19.13, I’ve just put 2yo dd to bed, done all my housework, been at work all day, so about to have a lovely hot bath and someone is knocking at my door, door is locked, not expecting anyone, my dp is working nights. AIBU not to answer or even check who it is...I’m scared

OP posts:
Bekabeech · 15/02/2018 20:19

Well at my house it would probably be another delivery meal for the people with a similar address to ours.
If I lived in the Lake District I wouldn't be scared to answer the door. If you are that scared OP, then open it with the chain, and have your mobile to hand.

sportyfool · 15/02/2018 20:19

Get a ring doorbell , then you can see who it is . I love ours !!

cardibach · 15/02/2018 20:20

I once answered a pretty timid knock at my door at 3am (I was up as it happened). It was a young woman who had accepted a lift from a friend of a friend, he’d pulled over and tried to rape her, she had hit him with her high heel and run to the nearest house with a light.
Anyone got any ideas how she could have got help without knocking a door?
I think not answering the door is part of the whole collapse of community in this country, and it’s very sad.

UnimaginativeUsername · 15/02/2018 20:21

Have you got problems with anxiety generally OP?

Patronising twat.

It is not patronising to ask someone who says they’re scared to answer their door at 7pm because it’s dark if they have problems with anxiety more generally. Because it would make a difference to the advice people would give.

Same as if there’s a backstory about a nasty neighbour, it will make a difference to how people reply.

UrsulaPandress · 15/02/2018 20:22

They'll be back .......

YellowMakesMeSmile · 15/02/2018 20:23

On on MN do people refuse to answer the door, let the meter reader in etc.

DropItLikeASquat · 15/02/2018 20:23

Im sure this thread will be quoted in the daily mail tomorrow lol Wink

falang · 15/02/2018 20:24

I don't answer my door at night. High crime area. The last time I did answer it it was the police.

SavageBeauty73 · 15/02/2018 20:25

Bizarre. It was 7pm. Open your door.

SaskaTchewan · 15/02/2018 20:26

Again, I think it's more dangerous to ignore the door and pretend the house is empty, especially in the middle of the night, but it's easy to just open an upstairs window.

If someone really wants to break in, they will, most of our houses are windows without shutters of any kind, just give a football to my kids and they show you how easy it is to break in

LucyAutumn · 15/02/2018 20:33

Do you live in London OP?

Someone At Door 😣
rightknockered · 15/02/2018 20:35

I don't open the door, I call through the door and ask who it is. I live in a high crime area, and gangs are literally roaming the streets around here looking for houses to break into and cars to nick for parts. There have been incidents of people opening their doors and being sprayed with acid. Children being attacked as burglars storm in on the family demanding gold/money/carkeys. I would not open the door.

melj1213 · 15/02/2018 20:37

I don't generally open my door in the evenings but it's usually because I'm not expecting anyone and I'm in the middle of doing something - showering, making dinner, cleaning the cat litter tray, shouting at gently encouraging DD to do her homework, general housework - that means by the time I get to the door the person has usually gone.

If it's someone I know they will usually message/call to say "Hey, I'm at your house and all the lights are on/can hear movement inside. Was just popping in to say hi/drop off X, wanted to make sure you were OK/not being burgled?" which then gives me the chance to reply and say either it's not a good time or to give me 2 minutes to finish what I'm doing and get to the door.

If it's an emergency they will usually knock more than once and/or the knocking will be more insistent ... if someone knocks more than once I will go to the door as then it's more likely to be something important.

7:13pm is not late and you should not be scared of opening your door at that time. If you are then you need better security - spyhole/chain/camera doorbell etc - and to work out why you feel scared of what is on the other side of the door rather than just annoyed/irritated at the interruption to your previously scheduled evening plans.

BoneyBackJefferson · 15/02/2018 20:41

Is it grotbags?

Someone At Door 😣
BuzzKillington · 15/02/2018 20:42

Only on Mumsnet are people afraid of someone knocking at the door.

ReanimatedSGB · 15/02/2018 20:46

I don't answer the door if I'm not expecting anyone. It will be Jeezus-jumpers, chuggers or debt collectors and they can all fuck off.

Pinkyblinder · 15/02/2018 20:49

@Cardibach

I had a similar situation years ago when someone in distress knocked on window needing help late in the evening.

Afterwards everybody thought I was mad for letting him in.

Maybe I should be more hesitant and not sometimes do things like putting the bins out at 2am in the morning!

But I do realise though that life experiences can cause anxieties in all sorts of situations, which for the OP is dealing with unexpected callers.

honeyroar · 15/02/2018 20:49

Grotbags! I'd forgotten her.😁

PaddyF0dder · 15/02/2018 20:55

It’s a tiger.

And the tiger said “I’m very hungry, can I have tea with you?”

m0therofdragons · 15/02/2018 20:55

Do violent criminals tend to knock? And since when is 7.15pm late? Mn never fails to baffle me. Just call through the door and ask who it is Confused

UnimaginativeUsername · 15/02/2018 20:56

I wouldn’t want to let that bloody tiger in. Especially as it seems to be capable of drinking all the water in the taps.

DreamyMcDreamy · 15/02/2018 20:58

Why the nastiness to the OP about why she's scared? I'd have thought WTF, get a grip a few years back but I can suffer from anxiety now and the phone or the door going unexpectedly can sometimes set it off (hasn't done for ages though.)
For all we know the OP could be like that.
I'd just think it was a cold caller at that time,as we tend to get the charity collectors on the doorstep around 7pm! Been known to come round not long before 9pm before too Angry

MrsGrindah · 15/02/2018 20:58

I’m pissed off that those of us who are perplexed at the OPs situation are being criticised for not magically knowing the back story. Why the OP didn’t give all the details in the first place, I don’t know....oh hang on..

MadMags · 15/02/2018 21:03

I agree. All the cloak and dagger “oh but if you knew you wouldn’t say that” is ridiculous!

Grow up!

GUMBYMUMBY · 15/02/2018 21:04

Seriously. Someone rings your doorbell. And you post it on an online forum asking what to do.
Exciting.

Swipe left for the next trending thread