What would you do about this?

[whattodoaboutman]

I am posting this here for traffic. I don't know how to deal with this or if I am blowing it out of all proportion.

A local man is a frequent user of the local sports centre. Many people know him as he's there so often.

When there is a children's sports club on the pool is closed to the public but the sauna is still open. This man will use the sauna and then walk into the changing rooms and strip off when the room has about 20 children in there and then shower naked next to the boys in the shower which is also communal.

He then goes to change and stands next to the boys who are getting changed, the boys find this intimidating. There are no separate cubicles yet, though they will be provided soon according to the centre management.

I think this is inappropriate but when it has been mentioned to the club safeguarding person and centre management nothing has been done.

What should I do ?

Personally speaking as a bloke, I would not be getting showered naked why there are 20 boys in the changing room, but only because I would be worried at what people would say or think

I used to take my DC to swimming lessons which shared a changing room with a gym. Shock horror there were women getting naked whilst changing in there. I assume the men's was the same for any kids with their dads.

This man might be getting off on it, but might also be perfectly innocently using the facilities for what they are there for!

There are no changing cubicles? Well unless you think he should keep wet trunks on under his clothes he is going to be naked at some point. Because he's changing. In the changing room.

Officially he's doing nothing wrong.

If this was consistent and not just a one off, I'd ask dh to go have a sauna at that time and see if he was so keen to shower naked and hang around with another adult there too.

Wtaf?
I've now caught up with the thread.
Male gets showered and dressed in male changing room after sporting activity - shock, horror.
Yabu.
I would do nothing other than teach my child a body is nothing to be ashamed of.

Sure, we need to be wary of sexual predators but it's coming to the point where adults can't be nude in communal showers around kids with the same anatomy? It's almost sending the message we need to hide our bodies.
I wonder how other European societies deal with this issue.

What do you actually want the centre to do though?

YABU!

Showering naked is pretty normal. Lots of children have seen me an many other stance women naked in our sports centre changing room.

This is such an uptight British thread. The rest of Europe will be pissing themselves laughing at you! All the Scandis would have the children naked with the man in the sauna and think nothing of it!

He probably like to take advantage of the fact the sauna is not busy and almost guaranteed to be empty at that time.

I think people are being massively disingenuous on this tbh, I highly doubt most people would be so casual about it in rl

Can't some of the dads go in, make sure nothing untoward going on and reassure kids. If he has dodgy motives it might put him off.

Shock... man has a penis.. man has a shower... man uses public leisure centre.
I just can't see the problem

Or just pull their track suits on and get showered/changed at home?

Ask the management to close the sauna too?

is he only using the gym at this time for a sauna? as that is weird.
does he always manage to time leaving a sauna to coincide with the boys being in the changing room? as that is also weird.
does he actually stand right next to them out of choice, or is there more room that would prevent the need for that?
when he was told this was making the children uncomfortable, did he modify his behavior in any way at all?
are there adults connected to the children in there too? what do they do?

you are allowed to have the tables turned.....so now your viewing this man/kids multichange as some sort of perverse thrill...if you still feel it in your gut its wrong.then its wrong. rather make a fuss over sod all than the alternative.of course he could be utterly oblivious. to his no clothes,to the 20 kids(aye,ok).so staff should have been able to approach a "regular"and dress it up however they see fit..even if his kid was in swim lesson(guessing its not)its still wrong.even if it was the female parallell its wrong..if its not right..its wrong. #prevention not cure

@FingersCrossedHard
I think the exact opposite. I think people are reading the op, assuming perv, and not remembering that grown ups getting changed in a single sex changing room is absolutely common place.

He's using a leisure centre for the intended purpose, at a time when it's open to the public. Even if there were private cubicles available he's not obliged to use them, but given that there aren't...

If you and the leisure centre don't want men using the facilities while the kids are there, the centre needs to close off during those hours.

I'm always puzzled as to why so many MNers are offended that anyone might be naked in a communal changing room at the pool anyway.

The man is doing nothing wrong , if your child is intimidated by a naked body I would suggest you take him into a family changing area or take him home as is and he can shower there . I wonder if the responses would be the same if we were talking about a woman and girls in a communal changing room .

I mean what can you do? Hes not actually breaking any rules
He could be doing it completely innocently, or he could not be but you have no evidence of that. I admit I would feel a bit uncomfortable if it was my child. Would you feel the same if it was a woman changing in the female changing rooms?

Does he have an erection when he’s showering?

If the pool was open to the public at the time and the same boys were in the same changing rooms and the same man was doing the same thing, would people still say that it was inappropriate?
It may well feel uncomfortable but he's not doing anything wrong.
Perhaps teach your son to look in the other direction.