Did you marry your great love?

[IsThisMeToo]

Why?

Why not?

How is your life now?

Yes.

I would have (and did) given everything for him.

I found out after 17 years that actually I mean fuck all to him and the slut who used to be a friend was a better match.

Who gives fuck about the kids, right?

4 years down the line and my 8 year old says she hates her life, my 4 year old is under every consultant going and I am keep doing.
I found someone for the past 3 years and although he has so much promise it just isn't love. No where near.

My ex? I wish he would die a horrible slow death. But I will always love him.

Not yet but I will be in 5 weeks!! I met him 9 years ago and can't imagine my life without him now!!

No. He died before we had the chance. No-one since has come close, but happily settled with great partner and fantastic kids.

it was actually very difficult to accept and I did keep wishing for a long time that circumstances had been different.

Do I still wish that we had the option to truly try? Yes. But I'm happy that I ended up with my husband (usually ;) )

No, I married a prick.

But my great love is playing footsie with me while we read in bed so it turned out ok.

No. We separated after his EA and affair. Don't think I have it in me to ever love again tbh.

@Whodofthunkit Just out of interest does your current H know about the history wrt your ex?

No I didn't . I married someone who I felt safe with, and maybe that was a mistake, but I love him and he has been a good husband.

I’m not disputing folk get each other etc but I don’t think we get one love chance and thats it
I don’t think marriage is the xenith of a relationship

Throughout my longest relationship from age 19-27, despite putting almost 100% of the effort into making it work, I still often fantasised about the boy I’d been head over heels for from age 13 until I left my hometown for university. I truly thought he’d always feel like the one who got away.

I’m engaged to a different man now and feel embarrassed that I pined over my first crush until my late twenties - I think I must always have known on some level that things weren’t quite right with my ex (he was an unfaithful jerk). My fiancé is without a doubt my greatest love.

@Whodofthunkit Just out of interest does your current H know about the history wrt your ex?

To a point. But it's not something we talk about a great deal.

Yes, been together 32 years, married for 15. We have our moments but he's my first and only love ❤️❤️

No - he was a charismatic, womanising bad boy. I loved him like a demented nutjob. I would have cried every day if I had stayed. I had to go cold Turkey and I cut him out of my life.

I eventually married a good man that I love (but not the same as the above) and we have a lovely family. I know I made the right decision.

No. We were the right people but it was the wrong time (for both of us) and we made a mess of things. My heart shattered into a million little pieces and I have never so much as even kissed a man since. I can't face that pain again and I don't believe I can ever find someone else that I can love like that. It destroyed me and took years to recover. That was over 10 years ago. I have been celibate ever since and intend to stay that way.

Definitely yes. Together since 16. Forbidden love. Went out for 4 years.
Then I got pregnant and then got married(families were NOT happy). Still happily married after 24 years (now Families VERY happy)
Wasn’t easy but we made it.

No and I feel sad about that.

Yes, I have. I wasn't particularly interested in getting married until I met the man who was to be my husband then wild horses wouldn't drag me away.

Previous boyfriends weren't husband material.

It's our silver wedding anniversary next year.

I have been lucky and have met some amazing men in my life, some who loved me but I didn't love back, some who I loved unrequitedly and some who I had short and fantastic flings with. But my husband is my great love. my love and respect and interest in him grows each year, and he inspires me to try and be my best self. I am delighted I get to be with him.

I feel sad you think there is one great love. I hope you're wrong. It's definitely the thing missing from my life. Despite a fab job and wonderful kids and house. .
I was looking for optimisum!

Yes.

Loved him then and love him more now.

The best friend I have ever had.

No.
Because they didn't want me. Unrequited is all I know!

So I married my kids' dad not loving him because he was their dad.
Turned out to be DV and philanderer. Now divorced.
That will be my last relationship in life.

I didn't marry my great love, no. And thank god for that!

I married a man who worships the ground I walk on but I don't take that for granted. We've been married over 20 years and I don't know what I'd do without him, even though we spend long periods of time apart. I love him backwards and forwards and wouldn't change my life with him for the world.

Yes, but God knows how. To this day I have no idea why he put up with all the crap I put him through or why he was so persistent. Or why he continues to put up with the crap. I think he was dropped on his head as a baby.

I thank God every day though.

No. He’s not the type to marry anyway. I still love him the same way I did when we were 18.