Pathetic rant but who ibu?

[Melonjelly]

Just been to a fairly large supermarket with dp and 2 dc. Youngest one was out of trolley and running around. He kept kicking off when we put him in the trolley.

We were in the veg aisle when I said to dp I need to pop to the loo, can you stay with the kids.

I went to the loo and was there for less than 2 mins. I come back to the veg aisle where I thought he would be. He's not there. I start scanning all the other veg aisles. No sign of him or kids. I traipse up the cooked meat aisle (we didn't need a lot of food, just a few bits and bobs). Again no sign of him. I walk up to the other end of the store to see if he's gone to get milk. Not there. I go to the bread aisle. Not there. I think to myself I wonder if he's taken the boys to look at toys to keep them distracted. I walked down the other end of the (large) shop. Not there. I go out of the store to see if he's making his way to the car. Nope.

I go back inside and search every aisle looking for him. Still no sign. I ring him. Supermarket is the worst for signal. If goes straight to vm. I try again. Straight to vm. I search around some more. Still can't see him. I try calling him twice more. Voicemail.

I go in front of the tills and search every single one. Not there. I eventually ring him and it gets through. He's at the doorway to the store, he's bought and paid the shopping. So ten to fifteen minutes I spent traipsing aisles searching for him.

He did the same last week and Again I spent a good ten minutes searching for him. When I eventually found him I said if I go to the loo can you please wait where you are so I can find you again.

So today I was fuming that he'd done it again.

He said 'dc2 was running off so I just wanted to get the shopping done and get out of there' so I said you'll have to put him in the trolley and teach the kids to wait so I can find you.

He said 'all you care about is ME ME ME, you're not bothered about what I want and the fact that the kids are hard work and I just wanted to get out of there'  to which I said you're missing the point, if you have waited I'd have been back in a couple of minutes. He's accused me of being selfish and asked me 'how hard is it to find me when you knew where I was going?' ??? Erm very considering I looked and looked again and you weren't fucking there you arsehole!!

So Who was being unreasonable! Even if you tell me I am it doesn't make him being a tosser any less of a tosser.

My oldest turns 5 tomorrow and he knows not to run off. I wouldn't stand for that with a six year old

@PurpleRobe
I had to scroll back up but indeed, fair enough, I take it back!

Purple robe do you want a photo of the receipt with today's date and also a photo of the pre cooked packaged chicken that was bought today if it would help set your mind at ease that that was indeed what was bought??

That's bizarre why would anyone lie about what they'd bought?

Oh I had to scroll back up. Got you now purple robe. Thought you were saying not true to the chicken

Ah Mel no - you’ve gone down a comprehension level now too, sorry!

Purple is referring to me saying you’d decided to leave it ... which is Clearly Not True

Melon jelly, here is a small tip for you I have picked up over the years. Most men have many crap elements to them, even the best of men have a number of imperfections you have to learn to live with. What is most true in life though is that no-one (including you) is perfect and therefore you have no right to expect anyone else to be. You just need to weigh up whether the crapness of your D"P" (and for that be grateful as he is easier to be rid of) outweighs what it would be like to be living as a single parent. Think long and hard about that decision as it is not an easy one to make, but I do wish you the best with it. However I do not want your D"P" as I myself have a D"H" I have been with for 30 years and despite his many annoying habits and imperfections I will stick with him, not sweat the small stuff and not spend my time winding up a vast amount of posters with a never ending thread about a tedious experience in Asda!

Yeah I got that now @NoSquirrels but thanks lol.

Comprehension needs more work!

Wow. How do you manage to get out of bed in the morning.. You've managed to drip feed for how many pages? I think your being pathetic. Get over it! Your making it more than it is. If this is all you have to worry about then theres something wrong with you.
Either shop on your own, wait in the car or stop pissing off to the toilet!

@Melonjelly OK, you’re back on top table again!

I think that you have reason, good reason, to be annoyed with your dp.

This isn't it.

The school pick up mess/ arranging to work when he has committed to looking after your dc, leaving you to pick up the pieces, not being able to take the dcs to the park on Saturday.

Next time: say you need a wee. Then let him find you. Or ltb.

My husband always does this. It’s fine; I can always find him. I don’t understand why you find it so hard.

That's beautiful advice Lavender but there's a lot of water under the bridge so speak which I won't go into on here. So whilst I don't believe in just giving up and chucking the towel in I find it hard to live with his 'shit bits' knowing that's the way things will be forever. And I don't think his god does outweigh his bad but I tolerate it as the kids would be devastated to see him leave. I think if anyone else did this shipping incident thing it would be a mild annoyance. To me it's just a symbol of infuriating he is when we already previously agreed to something and he reneged on that. Like I'm supposed to know he was going to? The content doesn't matter, it's the aggravating feeling he leaves me with when he does such things. Can't explain it well on here.

I get that with a decent partner this shit shouldn't and wouldn't normally matter.

I do t understand why it was 'so hard' to find him either but it just was. So what!

Can't do bold thingy but:

The school pick up mess/ arranging to work when he has committed to looking after your dc, leaving you to pick up the pieces, not being able to take the dcs to the park on Saturday.

Yes but I'm not allowed to be mad at these things!

Just let it go now Melon as people (including me, sorry!) are perhaps giving you too hard a time because you are letting this go on too long. Tomorrow is a new day and all that. Forget about it, let it go now, think about something positive in your life - your kids for starters! - think about something good you are going to be doing soon. If he is truly shit start thinking of a way to have a life just you and the kids as it won't be worse. Best of luck.

Of course you are. The shopping was just not a strong example. He's clearly very annoying in other respects

I can't be bothered to trawl through 12 pages but a couple of things occurred to me. A certain supermarket has the most amazing effect on my bowels, whenever I visited the loo before!
If OH and I get split up in a supermarket, only usually the two of us, why can every man, woman and their dog see me be he can't, he can look straight at me and not see me! He did this once when he was picking me up at a very specific spot, he drove past me, twice, the third time I jumped in front of the car, much to the amazement of bystanders

Yes but I'm not allowed to be mad at these things!

Why aren't you allowed? By whom?

By him. When things are genuinely his fault and has a direct consequence on others he kicks up a stink if I take him to task on it. And then tells me I shouldn't be annoyed.

When he picked dc up from after school club even though it was a given that I would be doing so, he never mentioned he would be doing it nor did he tell me he'd done it even though I pick dc most evenings, I see it as my role as does he. But he did it and failed to mention it so I turned up at the school. I wouldn't have been half as miffed but my work is miles away from where we live and I purposefully leave work early to meet my childcare commitments (as well as trying to beat the traffic). Wasn't allowed to feel annoyed in the slightest. I wish this was a one off.

Oh sod it 🙉
wear a nappy next time you go shopping
Problem solved 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

You both sound like hard work, so not surprising the kid's are as well.

@Melonjelly why are you with him?

Yeah forget the supermarket stuff.

Is this how you see your life going?

You don't have to suffer from bladder sensitivity. Get it looked at and resolved.

Jesus Christ woman....firstly you sound like you hate DP....LTB (not that I think he's a bastard but a saint for putting up with you!)
Let the kids choose bedding online...then buy!
Teach you children to be better behaved....(we manage to control 2 autistic children in a supermarket!)
Your life must be soooo very boring if this is the worst thing that could happen....I wish my life was so dull and with just this challenge!
Communication is a two way thing and it sounds like you are just barking at him and he's turned off!!!
Hope the kids enjoyed Thier new bedding!

Seriously op???

Get a grip