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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Dd "fat shaming" me.

422 replies

Dancingfairy · 08/02/2018 13:13

So I know I'm not small. I'm a size 16 (was a 12 before having my youngest) however dd has started "fat shaming" me. She's 6 and will say stuff like "why are you big and fat" infact she decided to say that in a shop yesterday infront of everyone. Also "whys your belly so fat" aibu in thinking this is normal stuff for a 6 yo to say? Or is it? Needless to say it's promoted the diet!

OP posts:
DontPullThatTubeOut · 08/02/2018 18:52

I’m probably fatter than you Op. my daughter asked why I have a big belly and I told her it’s because I eat way too much food. I also told her it’s a bit more wobbly because I carried two children and the lines are from stretching. No harm done and she hasn’t mentioned it again. I’ve also had my period talked about by her in public or the hair that I have. I just don’t get embarrassed and explain what it is as it stops the conversation. To constantly lie or tell her to be quiet will only make her more curious. You’re doing this to yourself by not parenting her.

CandyYumYum · 08/02/2018 18:56

You’re doing this to yourself by not parenting her.

What a spiteful comment to make.

Original poster
Dancingfairy · 08/02/2018 19:11

I don't "constantly lie" what a strange comment. I don't know anyone who would tell their kids about their pubic hair in public.

OP posts:
upsideup · 08/02/2018 19:20

I think its perfectly reasonable to say 'we'll talk about it later' or 'not right now' if its just not socially acceptable to have the full conversation in front of strangers, lying probably has no advantage and may confuse them more.

Bluntness100 · 08/02/2018 19:43

i don't know anyone who would tell their kids about their pubic hair in public

To be fair me neither 🤣

However I do think you can just say we will talk about it tongiht and then clearly do so.

blackchina · 08/02/2018 19:45

This reply has been deleted

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Handsoffmysweets · 08/02/2018 19:50

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blackchina · 08/02/2018 19:51

Why WOULD it be true?

We can all say what we want on the internet.

blackchina · 08/02/2018 19:51

And even if it is true. Who gives a shit?

BitOutOfPractice · 08/02/2018 19:52

Ignoring it and saying it's ok is not helping

Neither is letting the OP know your weight Batshit

It's interesting , a shit ton of people have posted their dress size or weight levels on this thread, but the only ones getting their arses handed to them are the slim ones

How the actual heck do you know what size anyone on this thread is Bluntness (apart from the ones who've rushed in to let us all know?)

Handsoffmysweets · 08/02/2018 19:54

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BatshitTrain · 08/02/2018 19:55

Why on earth wouldn't it be true Confused I can still grab a good handful of arse too.
No smug stealth boast... Just fact. Sorry you don't like it.

BitOutOfPractice · 08/02/2018 19:55

They aren't. They haven't been. I have no idea how heavy or otherwise most people are. Are you assuming that the ones who have been so horrible to the OP are all slim?

Bluntness100 · 08/02/2018 19:56

How the actual heck do you know what size anyone on this thread is Bluntness (apart from the ones who've rushed in to let us all know?)

Because they posted it, are you drunk?

whateverisnext · 08/02/2018 19:56

why do you think she is insulting you? She is asking about something she has observed. My five year old comments on the fact I have lots of moles, and points out the ones on my face. A friends who was a primary school teacher said the little ones would comment on her acne.
One of the staff at nursery told a tale of the children asking him 'why is your skin different colours? Why do you have so many bumps on your face?'
You can't assume that there is the same intent behind comments children make as adults.

Handsoffmysweets · 08/02/2018 19:56

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This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request

BatshitTrain · 08/02/2018 19:56

I'm not overweight... Start the bashing people... Done? Good.

BatshitTrain · 08/02/2018 19:57

You're not wrong! I'll try and remember to add a 1 next time Grin

Handsoffmysweets · 08/02/2018 19:59

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This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request

Octopus37 · 08/02/2018 20:00

I have had this with my DS who is 8 today. I'm not that fat (size 12, 10 if I'm lucky), used to be size 8/10 though. I have had comments like why is your belly so fat, you need to go to the gym and lose weight. I have generally just said stuff like, we are all different shapes and sizes or brazened it out and said things such as, I'm fat, deal with it

blackberryfairy · 08/02/2018 20:01

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BitOutOfPractice · 08/02/2018 20:03

No I'm not drunk Bluntness though I wish I was after reading this thread. Most people haven't posted their dress size. I certainly haven't!

BatshitTrain · 08/02/2018 20:04

Ooooo blackberryfairy you're in trouble now! Grin

Original poster
Dancingfairy · 08/02/2018 20:12

The reason why I said it was rude was beause I actually think she didn't want an answer. I think she said it as more of a statement rather than wanting to know the answer. Also how loud she said it and nothing had prompted it. She actually said it as soon as we entered the shop.

OP posts:
CandyYumYum · 08/02/2018 20:14

What is the relevance of posters' height and weight?