To consider three children sharing one room?

[TabbyTigger]

Our current home has 4 bedrooms.

DS is 18 and at University, lives there but comes home to stay overnight probably once a month, plus being home at holidays. He has the tiny box room and always has done.

The attic has two big rooms. Currently one is shared by DD1 (13, nearly 14) and DD2 (12), and the other by DD3 (5) and DD4 (2). The fourth bedroom is obviously ours.

DD5 is due in two weeks (eek!) and I can’t stop thinking about what we’ll do when she’s bigger. Currently, the most viable option seems to be to put her in with DD3 and 4, say when they’re 6, 3, and 1. But the room isn’t huge, so would have to be bunk bed and regular bed (currently it’s just bunk bed), and then have very little space for much other than dresser. WIBU to squeeze the three of them in together for two years, just until DS no longer needs his room? (Then DD3 can move in there, and we’ll be back to just 2 sharing each bigger room). Or should I just take a deep breath in and accept that a move is inevitable? I love this house and where it is so really don’t want to move. I’m probably just overthinking and worrying, I just cant stop wondering about how new baby is going to change our lives!!

Perhaps it would have been sensible to consider where you were going to put them before getting pregnant?

Agree. And people will say how unhelpful that is but seriously.

What pp said. Poor kids

Couldn't agree more, 5 kids but no though about where to actually house them

We did think about and discuss it then! But came to the conclusion that we’d bite the bullet and move if we decided we had to. Now it’s come closer to the time I’m increasingly reluctant to move, and think it would be easier to just squeeze for 2 years.

Perhaps it would have been sensible to consider where you were going to put them before getting pregnant?

This ^^

Adults selfish decisions impact on the children, it's all about your wants not theirs.

Surely the baby can sleep in a cot in your room for two years? I think you'll be setting up resentment putting a baby in with a six-year old, not to mention the lack of space.

Then I suggest your baby shares your room for that period.

Move house. A 4 bed (actually 3.5 bed since 1 is a box room) isn't big enough for a family of 8.

Does your eldest really need a room if he only comes once a month? Could he kip on the sofa so you then have another room straight away?

Keep her in with you til she's in a bed, by which time DS will be home less. Make the box room the little ones and have a trundle bed underneath DD3 or 4s bed. When DS comes home, DD5 in with the others on the trundle and he has her room.

Surely the baby can stay in with you for a couple of years?

My three brothers shared a room growing up as I was the only girl and we had a 3 bed house. Didn't seem to have any detrimental effect on them. I would suggest the baby in with you for the foreseeable future though.

I'm flabbergasted but the rude replays you have had
If keep he baby in with you and then give it the box room so you eldest can sleep on the sofa when they come back, there is no point saving a room for then if hey are hardly there.

It's non of anyone's business who the dads are ffs or how many kids have, Jesus kids night have to share a bedroom it's hardly child abuse

Baby gets the box room to sleep in once 12-18 months and goes right into a big bed. Shares with you when eldest comes home which in a few years could be practically never if my 20 year old is anything to go by.
Room could get redecorated neutrally and most of eldests stuff should really be stored or given to them if only home once a month.
Younger two keep shared room but youngest gets right to play there. Or if your house allows for a play room or area for kids to play that means little one only needs the box room for sleeping in.

I wouldn’t make the elder two share with little ones though.

I think you need to move. Your kids need some space

Your down stairs can’t be that big either if you only have 2 bedrooms on each floor (so ground floor is only the footprint of the 2 bedrooms and a bathroom?
For 8 people I would be moving to get a lot of extra space.

We have 3 and only 3 bedrooms so the 2 boys share but we also have study and a conservatory/playroom downstairs as well as kitchen and lounge so bedrooms are mainly for sleeping in.

Is your room larger? The 3 girls would need the largest room. There's nothing wrong with 3 sharing for now as long as they will comfortably fit. With the age gaps you have the older children won't still need a room at your house before your 5 year old needs a bit of independence from her little sister who is 5 years younger.

When I was 18 I went off to uni, my mother repurposed my bedroom. I knew I was always welcome but I didn't need a bedroom at her house anymore.

You could take one of the smaller rooms and give the 3 children the biggest room. You could even get a partition wall put in if it's a decent size?

Do you think your DS will move out immediately after university? I don't know anyone who's moved out straight away, generally they've gone home for at least a year (and usually more) due to high rent/low salary or, often, not finding work instantly after graduation.

I think you need to move house unfortunately, your current one is too cramped for 6 DC.

When you meet a new partner and you both have children from previous relationships and decide to have another baby together it can be hard for the children from the first relationship.

Moving the new baby into ‘their’ room, no matter how infrequently they use it or how logical it seems, can be extremely upsetting.