Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Another meal bill splitting thread...

215 replies

frenchfancy17 · 25/01/2018 16:12

Went out for a family meal today. I had a meal and dessert which came to £12.
I asked my mum to give my share of the money to person who paid the bill on their card for convenience as I had to dash for the School run and then I'd pay her back.

Get a text off my mum asking me if I'd known we were paying a bit towards my grandparents meal too (it was my grand birthday.) I text her back saying I didn't know this and how much was it then?

She texts back saying £20.
There was 10 of us at the meal including grandparents. 4 others had alcohol and expensive meals compared to mine... My auntie decided that we could just split the bill (8 of us.)

My mum said she said this at the table AFTER the meal. I didn't hear it!

She's being a CF isn't she?
My mum's also annoyed at it being decided for us!

OP posts:
Boulshired · 25/01/2018 17:07

I would be expecting to contribute to GP meal without prior discussions. I would not see the aunt as telling more of a reminder not to forget GPs money.

Pearlsaringer · 25/01/2018 17:08

Hang on a minute, if your meal was £12, and she is asking for a further £8, and there were 7 other people at the lunch not including your grandparents, then if everyone was paying the same additional contribution that would mean your grandparents’ lunch cost £64. Does that sound likely?

ChocolateWombat · 25/01/2018 17:09

Yes, ask for a separate bill for alcohol upfront. That can work. However you must make sure you don't have any then. There's no good turning into someone who says they only had one glass so do t want to pay so much. Calculating wine per head when bottles are shared is definitively going too far.

Builderrage · 25/01/2018 17:09

Hang on a minute.
If op payed £8 and there were ten of them but two didn't pay (the grandparents) then the remaining 8 all paying £8 extra would be £64! I'm doubting two fish and chips and coffee cost that.

I would happily pay towards or for birthday grandparents meal but after being stung many times with bill splitting where mine is a tenner and the other persons is £35 I refuse to split.

lastnamefirstfirstnamelast · 25/01/2018 17:10

Andylion
'I find the opposite. It's always the people that drink tons of booze and wait until the bill arrives to say "Oh, we'll just split it."'

thats fair enough but its not something i can be bothered whinging about. I'm just pleased to get to sit, have dinner and celebrate family occasions.

Builderrage · 25/01/2018 17:10

X post with Pearl!

MiddleClassProblem · 25/01/2018 17:11

You’re a CF for not leaving a tip and expecting everyone else to cover yours Confused

Andylion · 25/01/2018 17:12

thats fair enough but its not something i can be bothered whinging about. I'm just pleased to get to sit, have dinner and celebrate family occasions.

I can't afford not to "whinge".

Bluelady · 25/01/2018 17:13

All this fuss over £8? Really?

SoupDragon · 25/01/2018 17:15

Fish and chips were £8.50 and Coffees about £2.50

Food plus two coffees each works out at an extra £3.38 per person (excluding tip). The OP has stated that £8 is a fair amount of money to her and she has clearly chosen from the menu to suit her budget. Whilst it’s nice to pay for the grandparents, it’s a bit much the expect her to subsidise everyone else’s meal too.

Builderrage · 25/01/2018 17:15

Oh I think everyone just paid & 20 rather than what I thought.

In fairness tbh there have been times when I wouldn't have been able to lose £8 unplanned.

lastnamefirstfirstnamelast · 25/01/2018 17:16

All this fuss over £8? Really?

bluelady Bill splitting treads always are the best

Trashboat · 25/01/2018 17:20

Maybe you're the cheeky fucker for dashing off and getting someone else to pay on their card, assuming you would be paying for yours alone, when nothing had been discussed.

You never mentioned it, so you can't really moan about it.

I mean, you could ask everyone to refund you £1 each.

Rebeccaslicker · 25/01/2018 17:26

It's not that difficult socially, is it?!

If they are good friends or family, you split it. It will soon become clear if there is a habitual pisstaker, in which case you don't split with them any more. If they are people you see rarely, or work colleagues, you pay for what you had plus a tip, making sure this is understood at the beginning.

Now purely personally i would always rather overpay even if it's substantial rather than look like a cheapskate - and as a veggie who doesn't drink much or like pudding, I am usually the cheap date 😂 - but that's my preference. Some people would see that as shamefully profligate and that would be theirs!

PurpleDaisies · 25/01/2018 17:26

As a vegetarian who doesn’t drink much, it annoys me when people who ate expensive food and drank a lot suggest splitting the bill equally.

When I’m out with friends, we never have a problem adding up what we owe.

It would have been much fairer to ask people to pay what they had, plus the cost of the grandparents’ meal split however many ways.

BakedBeans47 · 25/01/2018 17:33

I am totally against cheeky duckers in bill splitting but an additional couple of quid isn’t really worth arguing over, is it?

TrickyD · 25/01/2018 17:37

We were in Brazil over Christmas and the New Year, and had several meals out with family and friends.

We discovered that many restaurants there have an excellent system whereby as you enter you are each given a small numbered form. As you order a dish or a drink, the waiter notes your number. At the end of the meal each pays what is on their tab. It completely eradicates the drinkers/non drinkers problem. Obviously you can, if you wish, ask for things ordered by others to be put in your tab. We thought it an excellent idea.

Maybe some places in the UK do this, but I have never come across it.

XiCi · 25/01/2018 17:41

I think it's you that's the cheeky fucker, leaving others to pay your share of the tip.
I would have expected to have paid for my grandparents so also would have left extra for that. Moaning over £8 instead of just enjoying a family meal with your grandparents is really sad.

mrsm43s · 25/01/2018 17:43

Right, so if there was no bill splitting and it was paying for exactly what you had, plus contribution to DGs meals plus tip then your contribution should have been.

£12 +£3.38 = £15.38, plus £1.54 for a (tight) tip = £16.92.

So in total you overpaid by £3.08, split by 7 other people - yup, you subsidised their meals by 44p each. Definitely worth getting cross about. I expect they waiting til you'd gone to discuss payment to make sure that they profited from that 44p, I'd be LIVID about that. Or not.

Let it go.

BooFuckingHooToYou · 25/01/2018 17:45

*Fish and chips were £8.50 and Coffees about £2.50

Food plus two coffees each works out at an extra £3.38 per person (excluding tip).*

So that’s £15.38 for the OP excluding tip. Say tip is 15% - £2.31, total bill for OP is £17.69.

They’ve gone and bloody stung you for £2.31 OP - the bastards!

Pearlsaringer · 25/01/2018 17:49

OP I get it, it’s the principle. I happily split the bill with my friends because they are nice people and no-one takes the piss. But as (another) non drinking veggie I have also found myself in the company of people who order every course and something to wash it down and then suggest splitting the bill. Well, they would, wouldn’t they?

Bite the bullet on this one but yes, you have been stitched up.

Rebeccaslicker · 25/01/2018 17:57

Bite the bullet? Look at the maths above - it's about £2. That's not even an air gun pellet!!!

Pearlsaringer · 25/01/2018 17:58

Rebecca Grin

MrsPicklesonSmythe · 25/01/2018 18:01

I think you’re being a Tight Fucker.

Rebeccaslicker · 25/01/2018 18:06

On another note pearl, why are so many of us veggies also the ones who don't drink as much??! This has often baffled me on these threads!