To think this is quite rude? I paid for her £72.34 shopping.

[LilacBearberry]

I work part-time in a supermarket and it was someone's last shift. I do have a gift for her at home (as she didn't know her leaving date) but I told her to grab a few bits and I'll treat her (I didn't know what else to do).

The shopping came to £72.34! She then goes "thanks so much".

She also knows I'm a student :(

Maybe it's my fault for doing what I did, but don't you think that's quite rude?

You've basically given someone a supermarket sweep as a leaving gift! It's not your fault, but it was too vague coupled with the fact she's one very cheeky cow!

She's properly taken advantage but the time to call her on it has passed. Learn to speak your mind at the time, politely but firmly.

She's unbelievable!

I think a few bits is confusing, wine and chocolates are not a few bits - how many items actually were there?

I thought you sounded young sorry for the sharp responses you got. Have you got another colleague manager who could get in touch and tell CF she took advantage of a young girl?

I can see my 18 year old DD being suckered into doing exactly the same thing by some CF tbh. I'm furious on your behalf. Definitely return the present you already bought her or enjoy it yourself. Lesson learned & move on now!

It was a very kind offer, and she took advantage. Most people wouldn't.

OP don't take the harsh comments to heart. Not all the comments are harsh, there's been lots of sympathetic ones. You were making a polite offer that MOST people who are not cheeky would have known exactly what you meant (bottle of wine/box chocs) and probably even said "this ok"? before expecting you to pay for just a bottle of wine or chocs. That would be normal manners. This colleague took advantage of you big time knowing you would probably be too polite to do anything else but go along with it. I bet she kept you chatting about other stuff too so there was never a moment to stop the flow of nice chit-chat to bring it down to the dirty topic of money. She will have known all that.

Thing is, we judge people by our own standards. And with most people but that's fine and works well.

Sadly there are outliers, like this monumentally CF.

Lilac You're not stupid. Your thankfully ex-colleague is a deeply unpleasant individual who gets her kicks by taking advantage of the kindness of others.

Your first encounter with a CF can be quite bruising, don't waste your time trying to understand it. Just use it to learn from, and be clear in dealing with people in future.

She is a CF and I'm sorry she took advantage OP

*

What a cow that woman was! How dare she?

Just wondering if dale winton was filming as she went round the store.
You need to be better prepared in life for the cf ness that seems to be sweeping the nation.
That’s out with my budget would work.
Don’t beat yourself up about it,you are obviously a nice person and someone took advantage of that

OP I am so sorry my dear . This is such a valuable lesson for you my dear. Put this behind you and Good luck , don't let this upset you too much it is her bad, you have been taken in by a very CF.

OMG are you very orange, OP? Could you be mistaken for Dale Winton presenting Supermarket Sweep?

Did she get an inflatable banana and 3 dvd's?

And thank goodness you work in a supermarket and not, say, Harrods!

If you're a student OP, don't go buying -cheeky ex colleagues someone you won't even recall in 6 months-- people gifts.

Oh my goodness, do these people seriously exist in real life?!? Bless you op

This is a pricey but simultaneously valuable lesson. It doesn't matter if she was nice to you. If she didn't become an actual friend then she has no reason to be reasonable with you once she's never going to see you again so she took advantage. More people are like this than you think. Don't take people at face value.

I now realise I was just fucking stupid. I was trying to be nice

You were being nice. She was just fucking cheeky. Sorry you've found out the hard way that everybody doesn't think the same as you

Yea. Life lesson - don’t buy gifts for people at work unless they are very close friends or it’s part of a whip round. A card (or a simple ‘good luck’) is good enough.

She was a cheeky fucker but you really need to practise how to say no to people like that.

And I can’t believe she actually had the nerve to do it! Even thinking how I would react if someone told me to pick something up and they’d pay for it - I think I would decline the offer and say ‘you don’t have to do that!’

Well either you chalk it up to experience or you get in touch and say you don't know what you were thinking paying that amount, it's left you short yourself, could she repay you £50 or so of the bill, fully expecting that if she's cheeky enough to let you pay in the first place, it's unlikely you'll appeal to her conscience now.

She isn't someone you're going to lose as a friend as she was never one in the first place.

Next time you need to be really clear about making gestures and assume that people could take advantage, in my experience usually they don't, but it doesn't hurt to be prepared.

You did a nice thing, I'm sorry it turned out like this.

I just can't believe this.

She’s older than you and knew you were a 19 year old student with low earnings. She massively took advantage of you, she was nasty. Chalk it up to experience and watch out for people like this in future. There are many like it as we all find out to our cost.

My DD is 21 and I can see her in this situation. Some people are horribly cheeky, OP. You are not stupid at all. Just be more wary in the future - we all get stung once!