To feel that you cant talk about being proud to bf?

[TwilightRiver]

Just to start I am not trying to be goady, and not wanting this to be bf vs ff.

I respect everyones right to choose how to feed their baby.

I haven been bf my lo for 5 months and am very proud of that fact. I have had very little problems and been fortunate enough to have avoided mastitis and thrush so far but its still been so bloody hard.

I have close friends that have babies amd chose to ff . I feel that i can't talk about it for fear of them thinking im getting at them or getting into a whole debate.

I also find that people find its's acceptable to make comments to a mum in regard to bf. 'Maybe theyre not getting enough' "They need water' 'no one else gets to feed, when you giving a bottle'. They wouldn't dream of making such comments to a mother whos ff or criticize her for her choice.

This is also extended to medical professionals. Here ff babies are weighed when born and again when transfered to hv. No weigh ins with midwife on return from hospital. where as bf babies are weighed on return fron hispital then 5 days then weekly. Apparently this is because they know how much ff babies are getting. Its like they are going back on the whole 'breast is best' and expecting you to fail. Or should be the same policy regardless of method of feeding.

All moaning cows are jealous.

No jealousy here - I breastfed my first with little issue for 20 months. I’m currently bf my second with zero issues, every hcp was amazed how naturally he took to it. I’m not ‘proud’ in the slightest, in fact I think it’s just luck. If I had any difficulty I’d probably have given up, I’ve read too many stories here of poor women who are made to feel like shit about how they feed their babies. This thread is just another example - feeding your child is nothing to be proud of! Neither is using cloth nappies over Pampers, using a sling over a pram, baby led weaning over jars of baby food and etc. Keeping your child fed, clean and happy is what is expected, not a matter of pride .

Why would you need to ever say that? I’ve got a friend who announced she was giving up ‘mummy milk’ on Facebook mentioned her DC was 16 months and she was 35 weeks pregnant. Complete with a photo of DC and text saying ‘no more boobie’. Why she needed to get validation from Facebook I’ll never know.

You know what BF can be bloody hard, a lot of pressure on mum and anybody who manages to push through the pain and carry on should be proud!!
Feeling judged by family and friends for feeding the too much or too little or for too long, feeding in public and feeling judged by on lookers. Being the only one who can feed your baby unless you spend hours expressing when all you want to do is sleep.

taskmaster isn't it rather sad that you have such strong feelings about how someone else feels about their own life??

Oh and by the way, you know absolutely fuck all about that poster that would make your opinion hold any weight whatsoever.

Lol at moaning cows? The only person that gives a flying fuck about how you feed your child is it’s parents

Of course you can be proud OP. You made the effort to do what you thought was best, even though it was difficult. That's something to be proud of in any context. Not sure why you're getting such a hard time for it.

I breastfed DD until she was 1. Exclusively for the first 5 months and then the occasional bottle so I could go out without her. I'm pleased that I found it quite natural and didn't get mastitis or thrush. I'm not proud of it though, because for me it was easier to stick DD on a boob than to express or make up formula, make sure it's the right temperature, clean the bottles and teats, etc especially at night. That's the main reason I carried on almost exclusively bfing until the end of mat leave.

People who have suffered through bfing, with pain and mastitis, but did it for their baby might feel proud of themselves. But equally people who gave it up because it wasn't natural to them shouldn't feel ashamed.

OP can certainly feel proud, after all I'm proud of various things that I know other people wouldn't give a shit about. But wanting to tell people how proud she is?? Hmmm.. she needs to understand it sounds like a parenting brag - BORING!

I get what you mean. When I've been with other bf friends I've felt able to celebrate the achievements as generally people who have bf know that its not a walk in the park. (Not that im saying it is for ff). With ff friends I used to try not to mention it, as people can be very touchy. It's sad that there is a divide like this between bf and ff parents.
It's OK to feel pleased that you've bf, no matter how many days or years you did it for :-)
For those who say it's not an achievement, it certainly feels like a challenge to bf sometimes. Anyone who has worked hard to do anything and succeeded for any length of time should be able to feel free to celebrate their sense of achievement with their friends if they want to.

It’s posts like this and an attitude like yours that creates a big divide between BF and FF parents. I don’t care how anyone feeds their babies, as long as they are fed.

Edmund that's kind of analogous to saying a kid who struggles to read but manages to finish an easy book shouldn't feel proud because a cleverer kid who reads easily wouldn't feel particularly proud to finish the book.

It's about a sense of satisfaction in achieving something difficult.

So, those who don’t BF, and FF, are they supposed to feel the opposite of proud? What is that again ... oh yes, ashamed. That’s it.

Horrible thread.

This is why there is so much mum shaming going on people wanting a pat on the back for doing normal stuff if every one could just do what they do without expecting a round of applause life would be so much easier.

What the hell is there ti be proud of.?? You bf big deal, someone else ff, so??

I actually find women who breastfeed more in your face than those who formula feed. Just feed your baby how you like! Why do we need to talk about it?

Great that you managed to do this. I tried to bf my son. Kept trying and trying. He just would not latch. I fed him with my own milk but had to use a pump several times a day.
Unfortunately this dried up after 5.5 months so onto formula and solids he went. Probably just as well really as I needed to go back to work full time when he was 6 months.

People have their own reasons for choosing how to feed their babies. Main thing is that baby got fed and that baby is healthy.

I can see why someone who has persevered with anything can be proud of it, including breast feeding. I think it might be the perseverance that you feel proud of rather than the act of breast feeding. I am proud of myself when I get DD to eat a vegetable rather than the act of feeding her! I wouldn’t bother discuss my pride with friends and family though as it is, after all, just feeding a child which we are all supposed to do. So by all means feel proud but don’t assume anyone is interested in how other people feed their children.

It's about a sense of satisfaction in achieving something difficult.

But that’s not the case here, is it? The op specifically said they had little difficulty with bf - they just seem to want to have an underhanded moan about FF babies and parents getting an ‘easier time’ of it with weigh-ins and such. Oh and some weird brag about not getting thrush.

Maybe OP feels proud because so many give up so early on when things are hard rather than pushing through. I’m proud that I got through the initial stages without giving up but not that I’ve kept it up for so long as I personally find it quite easy now.

Why not get a badge made I'm a successful b/f. Would that help.

I think it's more a sad representation of how much crap is shoved down our throats by the NHS and government that we feel the need to be proud about what to most is a basic human function. You lactate and your child latched, well done. I breastfed too before anyone asks.

You're doing what billions do every day and have done since the start of the mammals.

Why do you feel you need to be proud of that? Other than you're going against the trend of FF in this country. Which means you're feeling proud because you either feel superior/smug or because you've been a little brainwashed by society.

The mind boggles.

Pooing after giving birth was very brave and I did feel immensely proud and sore. I was not proud of having the ability to nd, or even the fact that apart from a couple of hours of mastitis it went incident free. I do feel a sense of accomplishment though.... and a new appreciation of my body, having had body ishooos for years.

Fuck it. Who is anyone to tell you off for feeling proud of yourself whether that's because you breastfed or you didn't or because you did a good old jobby. I'm glad you're feeling happy with yourself.

Feel proud of it if you want to but there is no need to announce that you are proud of it - and that applies to proudness in general.

nd = bf weird autocorrect