To ask you to join in on my Voldemort game?

[Mrsknackered]

What's the funniest scenario you can think of Voldemort in.

I like him in PJ's watching dancing on ice with a cuppa.

Using a self service machine in Tesco, and having to wait for someone to confirm his purchase/check his ID

I've been watching Harry Potter all afternoon

Trashboat, fat bum lady’s town was inspired by my town potentially getting it’s first tattoo parlour. We might be neighbours!

Wondering how he's going to buy fragrance for Mrs Voldy for Christmas... she asked him not to buy anything too floral!

standing on the bus stairs and it breaks sharply, throwing him into the wall.

Some of these have really made me laugh out loud. Thank you

Trying to get bang on £20s worth of petrol in his car and getting £20.02 instead.

Singing say hello to the sun at baby sensory class, but not knowing the right moves and struggling to copy the leader.

On an escalator going up. There’s a man dressed as a clown, going down on the one next to him. Voldemort can’t help staring.

Tutting and huffing at the self service checkout when there’s nobody around to approve his craft beer purchase.

Volunteering at a kitten shelter.

Walking his Border Terrier to the newsagents to buy the Sunday Telegraph and a pint of milk.

Having a verbal with a fellow customer in Greggs over the last steak bake.

Trying to type a letter on his laptop but the cat keeps trying to sit on his lap.

In an aquafit class, in speedos, trying not to lose his shit as he's repeatedly elbowed and splashed by the over-zealous aquafitter next to him.

Getting a nuisance phonecall from one of those, 'I heard you were in an accident that wasn't your fault' people, and spending half an hour arguing with them.

Waking up the night after a heavy drinking session and realising he'd done some sloshed Amazon Prime shopping. Later that day, 100 pairs of plastic glasses with attached nose and moustache show up at his door.

Walking through a hallway with lots of doors just behind someone else, and awkwardly having to come up with various ways of saying 'thanks' each time they hold the door open for him.

I love the image of him and Dumbledore in Lidl.

And I also think these scenarios all work equally well with Darth Vader. (I’ve had a Star Wars binge this weekend)

Trying to grab his case of the luggage carousel and being elbowed in the face by an over zealous old lady getting her matching tartan luggage.

I read that he had a secret child with Bellatrix, therefore would really like to see him parent a child and deal with a mother in law.

Because Bellatrix's mother can't be easy. And waking up to night feeds and explosive nappies ...

Honestly crying laughing at these!!! Having had a shitty few days, this is exactly what I needed!

Walking through a hallway with lots of doors just behind someone else, and awkwardly having to come up with various ways of saying 'thanks' each time they hold the door open for him

Going on 'a place in the country' expecting to find the perfect house in Norfolk with a modest budget.

Counting his syns on slimming world

He’s watering his containers when Jean from next door comes out. He ducks and pretends he hasn’t seen her, then has to wait until she’s gone in before he can peg out his washing.

Standing in line for 40 minutes at the post office to have his passport application verified for a £5 surcharge..... they have to reject his photo as it wasn’t countersigned and he was smirking, which isn’t an approved expression and the lady behind the counter points a stubby finger at the photo that shows a smirk and a big Red Cross over it.

Going on 'a place in the country' expecting to find the perfect house in Norfolk with a modest budget

Hahahaha

Skulking in the changing room too ashamed to ask the salesman to swap the M for an L on the shirt that he just nearly split