To feel my husbands family are a bit racist

[Winterandspring]

I think racist is probably the wrong word I’m looking for.

I met dh when he’d already been living in England for almost a decade and now we are expecting our first child the attitude is very much that it’s time for him to come ‘home’ now They constantly slag England off, the traffic, the high price of houses. Whenever we are there they stop at houses and shout ‘how much would this set you back in England eh’ and we say £200,000 or whatever and they shout triumphantly how much cheaper it is there! Neither of us like visiting because it’s a faff either flying and hiring a car or expensive ferry trips and they won’t come to us. Plus it’s tense the whole time due to them complaining about England and the schools or trying to shove food on us.

What is worrying me though is I have no support at all and have struggled in this pregnancy. Dh has been making ‘well maybe we could think about’ noises. I would struggle to get work over there and so really my support would be his family, I’d rather not!

I don’t know why I’m posting but there was an argument last night and it’s just been annoying me today.

I think the Irish are well within their rights to feel animosity toward England and the English.

donut do you see a difference between 'the English' and 'the British government'?
I do hope so.

How far back do you want me to go? 1171? 1542? When Ireland was on the verge of a civil war and invited British soldiers?

I didn't ask you to justify the British occupation of Ireland. I asked you defend your statement that it wasn't a fact that there was a British occupation of Ireland?

Anglophobic maybe.

We have world class schools, universities, public health, quality of life ( assuming you’re not in poverty or on the breadline/ zero contacts etc).

Are you English?

@IWannaSeeHowItEnds fair enough.

I’m still stunned that bob is insistent that there was never a British occupation of Ireland. What was the Easter Rising for then?

Fair enough bob/pen I’m sorry about your Mum being injured (genuinely, no digs)

I spent a lot of time in Belfast as a child, my Dad's best friend is one of The Disappeared still outstanding and I grew up hearing both sides too. I don’t condone violence/atrocities from any faction, whether they are republican, loyalist or British army.

William of Orange was Dutch

You can go to a good school and not get a single exam/proper education. Cop on can't be taught.
Describing workhouses as a positive thing proves that.

Putting aside the rather heated Irish v English discussion, I would have thought that your PILs behaviour is relatively normal. What you've described doesn't sound xenophobic to me. Annoying certainly, but pretty normal.

Many parents wish for their adult children to live near them, particularly when grandchildren are in the picture. And some will go on about it in the mistaken belief that their child will suddenly see that moving back 'home' will be enormously beneficial. It really depends on the family.

The Welsh and English families in Gavin and Stacey play on this dynamic extremely well!

Well, I've RTFT, and wow, it's moved on completely from the original OP post!

The PIL are not xenophobic, they're just trying to convince you that Ireland is a better place to live than England. (I can't comment as it's one country I've never visited.)

In the political discussion, there's no question that the potato comment was out of order, and MNHQ agreed because they deleted the post. There's no question that the Irish have very good reason to be hostile to the English.

You seem determined to paint me as a mindless frothed. I’m really not and it’s quite bizarre that you keep insisting I am.

And dyslexia has nothing to do with whether or not you actually know anything about the occupancy of Irish lands, or the famine for that matter.

Bit odd, too, that you claim to have noticed “a few posts back” that you were misspelling my username, since you continued to do it.

Just stop rising to it!

When they ask how much a house is, tell em you have no idea, perhaps if they’re interested they can look online.

Just grey rock them, dunno, not sure, I suppose so, never thought about it. Or just ignore altogether

*frother. Autocorrect.

Ooh dear, your own insults are becoming even more thinly veiled.

Careful now. :)

I counted four commas in my last post. Too much? Even with that wonderful education? Shame.

Too much commas? Would you like to rethink that?

I think the Irish are well within their rights to feel animosity toward England and the English.

That's a pretty awful attitude. It's only ever been a small section of the elite which was responsible for that sort of thing and for most of history the majority of the English were just as oppressed by the same people they didn't even vote for.

To harbour bad feeling towards 'the English' in general is just silly.

As in; was the sentiment too much. Jeez! How long did you go to school for??

And there we have another cultural stereotype. Casual xenophobia really is your thing, isn’t it?

One comma.

" the majority of the English were just as oppressed by the same people they didn't even vote for."

if they even had a vote, that is.
Thank you Elton. I did make this point some time back on this thread, but nobody replied.
Honestly as soon as someone starts on about 'The English' I get annoyed.