How do you deal with kids who do this?

[CheapSausagesAndSpam]

Visiting child...every time she's here and I am prepping for example a sandwich or bowl of icecream or whatever....she will say quickly "Can I have that one?"

And point to whichever is slightly larger.

Bowl of icecream, slice of cake, chopped up salami....doesn't matter what it is.

I think it's rude...should I say something? DD and the girl are both 10...
Today they were at my house (we're in Oz) and another two little girls were also playing and the girl did it again and DD then followed suit.

I should have said "DD we don't try to grab the biggest...it's not polite..." but because I've never called her friend out on it, I felt I couldn't.

I will need to say something now DD has begun it...

Plus, when I serve apple crumble and custard, and ice cream aswell, if anyone wants, I mostly dish equal portions. Generous sizes. But I normally leave a bit.

Like a pp, said she did.

then, (this said guests -OP's) guest or Dh or anyone can have a bit more, if they really want, afterwards.

Then OP's guest wouldn't have the opportunity to complain, would they? Because they'd have been offered seconds.

I think at ten years old that is very rude,
All the stuff about you trying to make your protions exactly the same is nonsenes OP - that's treading on eggshells round a demanding child. i assume your portions are pretty much equal - you don't get identically size portions even in a restaurant. It's ridiculous.

I wouldn't put up with it, I'd do as I think you plan to and say 'Sit down at the table and I will hand them round' and ignore any requests for the bigger one - treat it as if she hasn't even asked, don;t respond to 'I want that one' just ignore and carry on with serving up. Hopefully she'll get bored of asking.

For anyone saying she's hungry ? - No one ever starved from getting half a gram less ice cream than their friend.
And fat shaming? - my God that's just mad. She could be thin as a rake for all we know. If it's anything it is 'selfish and greedy shaming' - which is fine by me, people can learn not to be those things.

One divides, and the other chooses first.

We used to have a little girl come to our house who did that! I used to say sure but I just need to even them up a bit first. She would always spot the nicest bead, the pink beaker, the most glittery whatever...I became quite cunning in the end but I used to get quite frustrated when other parents didn’t see that she would always make sure she got the best! It was years ago but still irritates me now writing about it! I clearly need to Let it go.

Someone I am loosly frineds with it like that.

Will always position himself in the best seat, for the best room in the chalet, for the best food, to be in the most optimal taxi group, whatever. It is annoying and it annoys me that other people don't notice so I would look really petty if I challenged him!

Funny at age 2, not endearing at 10. You're not doing her a favour ignoring it, although admittedly it's embarrassing.

I think you're asking a lot for a 10 year old to selflessly put other people first. They need to be taught fairness - my DH mum dealt with by one cuts the other chooses, taking turns to pick first is good too or having a house rule that the person who asks for the biggest gets the smallest. You may think she should know this already, but she doesn't so decide what works in your house and do that but maybe stop getting pissed off at the child? I doubt she's purposefully being selfish or greedy.

For those saying maybe this child needs a bigger portion, nobody needs the biggest piece of cake or the biggest bowl of ice cream. Want is not the same as need.

OP I've had this with visiting kids. The answer is "off you pop, I'm busy dishing up"