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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To this this could be a sign my wife is having an affair ?

229 replies

tobeworriedaboutthis · 10/01/2018 20:40

Brand new poster, I know my wife uses this so I thought I'd give it a go. Been with my wife for 10 years married 3. I adore her and to be honest have no idea how I have ended up with someone like her, stunning beautiful, smart, driven, sexy - basically everything you could want ! However recently her behaviour has changed massively. She changed jobs, to a much more male dominated sector of her industry - works in a male only office, all her clients are men. As soon as she took that role her habits changed. Took a much greater interest in health and fitness. She does not need to loose weight in the slightest. But over the space of 6 months started working out more and more, adjusting her diet, cutting back on booze. Now she works out every day with her boss, who himself is a married man. She looks amazing, however I can't help thinking this is maybe a sign of something else. We have had a hard year, trying to have a baby without any luck. The next step is IVF due to our age, which I've always said I won't do as i have seen it ruin marriages (the cost, the stress) I have a child, who lives with us part time -they have been clingy and challenging recently, which my wife can struggle with. My ex has needed extra support finically due to problems in her life, my wife hasn't always agreed with the level of help I give. She tells me the exercise help her deal with the stress of the year and wanting to look good for me. AIBU to think maybe her head has been turned at work (god knows she will turn plenty!) if this was your husband would you be concerned?

OP posts:
wagil · 17/01/2018 16:43

You over egged it on that last post OP.

IlikemyTeahot · 17/01/2018 20:15

Agree with dickiedavisthunderthighs I think you two need to talk...and for what it's worth if you have the child part time and you're paying some child maintenance then the ex's finances should not be your problem. Your child and current partner should be your only priorities. Is the IVF not an option because your helping the ex? I'll bet that bothers your wife. Talk to her about it including your fears and come to an agreement on how you are both going to proceed. Can you see a future together when her wants and needs are always pushed aside...whilst you are paranoid about her behaviour...its not fair on either of you...there must be a solution to this.

IlikemyTeahot · 17/01/2018 21:22

Feel like some of you on here are jumping the gun a bit just because this is a fella...

IlikemyTeahot · 17/01/2018 21:33

Iwanttobe8stoneagain Best advice so far...

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