Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

About baby names and dh

232 replies

FuckOffDailyMailFools · 08/01/2018 11:48

Dc2 is due in a week’s time. Dh and I have very different taste in names. He likes very classic names. I like what he thinks are unusual names, but what I think are actually pretty standard, just not AS classic as his choices.

For example, his favourites are:

James
Jack
Matthew
Lewis
Christopher

My favourites are:

Gabriel
Barnaby
Rupert
Wilfred
Felix
Milo

I’m sure everyone has their opinions on our respective lists, but these are our favourites.

So, I have been suggesting ‘compromise names’. Not my favourites, but more classic names which I can live with. For example:

  • Christopher with Kit as a shortening - dh says he refuses to use the shortening Kit
  • Miles with nn Milo
  • Thomas
  • Edward with nn Ted - dh said no way to Ted. I said fine, just Edward then with Ed / Eddie / whatever. He said no
  • Marcus

He has rejected all of these suggestions.

With dc1, we were supposed to each choose a name, (I chose boy, he chose girl). Then, depending on what we had, (didn’t know sex till birth), we would use that name. But actually, now I think back, the name I “chose” wasn’t a favourite. It was a compromise name which I sort of liked but which dh also liked as he disliked all my favourites. His girl name was his absolute favourite girl name. I didn’t hate it, (he wouldn’t have used it if that was the case), but it was my least favourite of the names we were considering. We had a girl in the end, so used Dh’s favourite.

He then was really uncompromising about the middle name, (family name), which I didn’t like on its own. I wanted another name in between, as the vowel sound at the end of dd’s name and the start of the middle name run into each other. He said no.

I remember getting really upset about it when dd was about 10 months and asked dh if we could change her name to a longer version, (which I preferred), on the bc, but still call her the same, shorter name in day to day life. He said no and got upset himself that I wanted to change it.

Wibu to deliberately be as uncompromising as he is now? Am I being a childish dick if I do that?

I’m having a shit time this pregnancy, (not dh’s fault) and think that’s making me irrational about this. I’m doing that “I’m doing all the work here, so why don’t I get my favourite name” thing, (in my head only), which I realise is pretty childish. And actually he’s been amazingly supportive recently. Think I’m just very fed up.

OP posts:
flumpybear · 10/01/2018 05:33

For our little boy my husband wanted a Scottish name and the only one I liked was Cameron but thankfully he also liked it! It was difficult as he was adamant he wanted a Scottish name as his family derive from Scotland

Tangofandango · 10/01/2018 05:58

My 18m grandson is Matthew. I don't personally know of any other baby/toddler Matthews, although I've heard a few being called when I'm out shopping for example.

I can't imagine our Matthew being called anything else, and I think it's lovely. Not too common these days, but not way out either.

StephiD3 · 10/01/2018 11:01

There will always be someone who is rude about your name choice. I don’t understand how people can’t have manners and keep opinions to themselves - especially when Baby is already here and named!!

We have a Rupert. Most people think it’s really cute the only few exceptions being older men (including my Dad!) who turned their nose up at it.

Also DS2 - aged 4- called baby ‘Frank’ while in my tummy (didn’t know of boy/girl) and was furious coming to visit us in hospital discovering this wasn’t his name. Cue meltdown by my hospital bed, crying he wanted his baby Frank and that’s what he was calling him. Then howled out “stupid rupid” Confused

He got used to it and now calls him baby Rupey! We also call him Little Roo.

I think you have to wait til he’s here- you both might look at him and have a lightbulb moment!

AhhhhThatsBass · 10/01/2018 11:08

I think you should have final say. You're the one giving birth.

brotherphil · 10/01/2018 13:55

Tell him he's lucky to get an input - DC2 & DC3 I got asked my opinion of possible names, but the choice was DW's alone. DC1 I just got told the name.

muffyduffster · 10/01/2018 19:14

My DH didn't even offer names, just vetoed mine Hmm I gave him a long list of ten of each and said he had to pick from those!

2ManyChoices · 11/01/2018 13:39

I love your choices!!
We've got a nice mix in our family, some of my faves, and some of my kids, brothers and relatives names mixed in,
Charlie
Bohdi
Josef
Travis
James
Jacob
John
Smith
Jeremy
Riley
Teddy
Luca
Mathew
Fallon
Todd
Brax

I think a boy should have a name that is strong, and that represents what you want him to represent. Every name has a meaning and sometimes the meanings can sway your choice!

New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread