Should toddlers be running round the pub screaming on a Friday night?

[Notevilstepmother]

I’m sorry to be mean, I love kids generally, but if I go to the pub on a Friday night and it’s not one of those pubs with a soft play and a children’s menu I don’t really want to have people allowing their children to run round and scream at the top of their voices. I was trying to have a conversation with a friend and someone encouraged their children to run around our table, nowhere near where they were sitting. One of them was only 18 months old and was screeching with excitement which I get, and the others were maybe 3 and 5 and were under the bar staffs feet and nearly tripped them up a few times.

I’m not necessarily saying ban children, but maybe after 7 or something, or have them sit down and not run around. Not everyone wants other people’s kids being noisy when they are having an adult night out. AIBU?

It's just shit parenting. Toddlers should be cosy, tucked up in bed by 8pm. Certainly not tearing round a busy pub while their lazy parents half ignore them in favour of chucking one last drink down their throats.

When I was a student I worked as a waitress and witnessed a few nasty collisions between tray-bearing staff and young children.

And it certainly isn't a given 'that young children will run round's. Ours never did. If we were in a pub, cafe, restaurant etc they stayed sitting at the table unless they needed to go to the loo, and we took them.

Absolutely no need for young children to run around in pubs if their parents actually bother to parent.

It's about appropriate behaviour in the appropriate setting.

I don't take my lap top and paperwork and go and plonk myself in the middle of the toddler room at our local nursery, and try and prepare for any important presentation. And then start hissing and scowling at the toddlers for being too noisy and bumping into my laptop and standing on my paperwork.

Conversely if I'm in an adult setting, like a pub/restaurant in the evening I don't want to have to listen to toddlers squealing, or have one accidentally drag my coat off my chair, or nearly trip me up on my way to the loo.

A toddler running away shrieking gets indulgent smiles NEVER.

I was thinking about this thread today, when I went to a pub lunch with children. In the pub, there was a couple of toddlers, being walked around by their parents, to distract them. There were children sitting nicely around tables. There might have been a baby crying and some adult took him outside.

No shrieking, no running around, parents looking after their own children. It doesn't seem that difficult

Today 17:07 TheOtherGirl

It's about appropriate behaviour in the appropriate setting.

Conversely if I'm in an adult setting, like a pub/restaurant in the evening I don't want to have to listen to toddlers squealing, or have one accidentally drag my coat off my chair, or nearly trip me up on my way to the loo

Why do you think pubs and restaurants are 'adult settings'? The majority are for families.

It's a very Western concept that children should be tucked up in bed by 8pm! In many countries there is a long siesta and kids stay up well into the evening. It's not 'shit parenting' just a cultural difference. My extended family are horrified that we feed children at 5pm then pack them off to bed at 7, so we can eat undisturbed. They think it's selfish and excludes kids from family life.

I think that's just the way to do it, Llangollen. It's what we used to do, though we took them outside, away from the other tables. But taking them to the fruit machines, like a PP said, is a great idea. But onetwothree thinks walking between the tables is rude, so that's something to bear in mind for parents.

I'm just glad we're past that stage, it was so stressful.

Zoop pubs and restaurants become adult orientated places in the evening, when young children should be at home tucked up in bed.

Culturally here in the UK children do tend to go to bed earlyish. I know my two needed to go to bed at 7pm. They were shattered.

Not being unreasonable! One of our local pubs has a separate area for families which is good so that if you want a quiet meal / drink you can have it whereas parents with toddlers don't need to feel bad if they kick off. I know it's hard with young kids but running around screaming at other peoples' tables just shows a complete lack of discipline from the parents and is totally wrong imo. If your child does that you should go and get them and tell them to sit nicely and if they don't play ball then take them home and they don't get the nice meal out etc that they would have had.