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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Just dropped a clanger - what are yours?

262 replies

musicform · 05/01/2018 11:58

I was talking over the web to someone I know about their mother's passing and finished off the conversation by saying drop me a line after the cremation when the dust has settled. I didn't even pick up my gaffe until their response repeating my line - they took it well!

Anyone else made an unintentional gaffe recently?

Blush
OP posts:
Snowysky20009 · 06/01/2018 12:35

Another one:

Working in care and was asked to wake Mr Jones for lunch. So I went and found him, and he's in a wheelchair. So I'm quietly saying 'Mr Jones, Mr Jones your lunch is ready' whilst tapping him on the leg.

Suddenly his one eye opened and he said 'love you can tap me by the for as long as you want.....'

I then remembered he was an amputee with false legs........

CrockedPot · 06/01/2018 13:44

Mine’s horrific but I once told a former colleague to ‘turn a blind eye’ to something. Yep, he only had one eye. I still cringe deeply when I think about it.

DagenhamRoundhouse · 06/01/2018 17:34

When I was an obnoxious schoolgirl, I was in the newsagents with a rather chunky school friend and we were looking at the magazines. I noticed a copy of an 'Incredible Hulk' magazine and nudged her, saying "Look there's you." I turned to find a completely strange woman standing there. Never moved so fast in me life.

charliemaine1bee · 06/01/2018 17:34

I used to be a Butlins Redcoat when they had hotels as well as camps.Had an elderly couple check in late one night when reception had closed so a fellow red and i were asked to assist them up to their room as both were blind.Chatted away making conversation on way up to their room -opened the door and exclaimed- Oh my word you've got the best view in the hotel how lucky are you! ...cringe..

MissBeehiving · 06/01/2018 17:55

I was explaining to my boss why I needed to postpone a task as “I had my hands full of Dick”, so embarrassed.

Darcychu · 06/01/2018 17:57

started working for a company and the bosses were gay and married (but i hadnt met them ), no joke i walked into work one morning shattered and pregnant to see them there, they introduced themselves and all i could blurt out was " Oh the Gay guys* .... I was mortified, not like i didnt even know any other gay people it was just the first thing i could react to because i couldnt remember the names and all i remembered was that they were gay.

im still mortified just thinking about it.

dementedma · 06/01/2018 18:00

telling an army veteran who was now a triple amputee that the programme he was taking part in had started from small beginnings but had "grown arms and legs".

I still want to die of shame!!

flippaflippa · 06/01/2018 18:11

My brother's partner had unforseen emergency surgery removing greater part of her lower intestine and colon. On hearing that she would need a colostomy bag I replied that she must be gutted (no pun intended obvs)

user1485851222 · 06/01/2018 18:26

I raised my glass at Christmas lunch, hubby, son & myself, said " Merry Christmas, it hasn't been a bad year". To which my hubby replied, "Apart from my mother dying". Whoops. I then said, " I meant for us round the table", he replied, "Yep my mum died". Luckily he has a sense of humour.

riceuten · 06/01/2018 18:29

I recently stood for a position in the local Labour Party and narrow missed being elected. "At least I didn't get beaten by StinkyFagSmokingBloke" quoth I, "that would have killed me". He was standing directly behind me.

Oops

riceuten · 06/01/2018 18:32

telling an army veteran who was now a triple amputee that the programme he was taking part in had started from small beginnings but had "grown arms and legs".

I think there's something awful and evil in your subconscious that does that kind of thing to you - "Can I give you a hand?" said I once to someone who congenitally didn't have anything below either elbow, or "You'd have to be blind not to see it" to someone sight impaired.

CharizMa · 06/01/2018 18:37

I've thought of my worst one. Man was leaving work when I was 21. He had a terminal illness and wanted to go on a trip with his wife and adult son. I said Blush sixty is a good innings. I'd be really pissed off to be dying that young and if somebody a third of my age shrugged and told me I'd had a good innings, I'd throw my stapler at them. Don't know how he restrained himself.

wino the steak and kidney pie served up on the renal ward made me laugh too!

Twoo · 06/01/2018 18:40

I once asked my dual heritage friend if she would ever use sunbeds Blush . I just saw her as my friend and didn’t register she had naturally darker skin. Friend was in hysterics and was not not offended.

I’m still mortified 35years later.

chickenanbeanz · 06/01/2018 18:49

My mum many years ago said to my dad's new boss 'I suppose you turned a blind eye to...' she had not realised he had a glass eye. She also once opened the door when stark naked thinking it was my dad, coming back from walking the dog, had forgotten his key it was not but an elderly colleague of my dad

Doofletch · 06/01/2018 19:27

Just the other day I said "you can't take your eyes off them" to a man I know (was discussing dd legging it up the stairs at 10 months). Yep He's blind in one eye and half blind in the other. He responded with "And I've only got half of one!" which was the piint I realised my giant gaffe!!!!

sunshine99789 · 06/01/2018 19:30

When Take me out came on tonight...DH said ...
"right, lets see the t*ts then" (meaning the idiot men).
I gave him the death stare for as long as I could manage,then burst out laughing.
.

raspberrysuicide · 06/01/2018 19:40

I met a couple that I didn't know very well at a pub for a meal. We were chosing what to have from the menu and I made a totally stupid comment about being halfway to having bulimia - I binge eat but don't throw up...
The woman was actually bulimic Blush

missuspritch · 06/01/2018 20:30

I was once chatting to a new colleague (getting to know her) when I mentioned an old customer who I felt was rude, took the piss and who on occasion had made it clear that she didn’t really give two shits about her kids.., turns out that customer was my new colleagues sister.... I didn’t realise for a few weeks.. it wasn’t until I was talking to another colleague, who had made the same mistake, that I realised my error!

I also had a friend who worked in a shop stacking shelves... apparently he asked his colleague who only had one hand... ‘do you need a hand’ whilst at work one day.

Some of these are really funny but also very cringey!!

At least your friend took it well OP xx

PerfectlySymmetricalButtocks · 06/01/2018 20:31

Am I bad for laughing? Xmas Grin

DuckAndPancakes · 06/01/2018 20:37

Went to visit grandad at the funeral home on the day of his funeral. He was, as always, looking smart and presentable.
Mum put a cigarette in his top pocket. I put a joker card in his right hand...(says everything about him)
Funeral director turns to us and says how dapper he looks and without skipping a beat I replied “yeah, he’d never be seen dead without a shirt and tie on...”
She was mortified... Mum and I cracked up laughing because it was JUST the sort of thing he’d have said.
Mum then commented he could “light his fag on the way down”
Funeral director AGAIN looking mortified started bumbling about how I’m sure he’s a good man and will be going to heaven as he’s so well loved.
Mum : he’s being cremated, I really hope there’ll be a light....

And most uncomfortable moment I had that wasn’t my fault.... sitting in abortion clinic with friend when we were 18. Made me feel really uncomfortable anyway But was trying to be supportive. Radio is on. Papa don’t preach cake on.
To a room full of women waiting for abortions. I wanted to crawl inside myself when the line “I’ve made up my mind, I’m keeping my baby” came on.

puffyisgood · 06/01/2018 21:07

In a tiny airport somewhere [maybe in the Caribbean], think we were in a stationary queue, bumped into a former colleague who was always super-perfect, way ahead of me in all respects, my DS aged c 1.5 was squawkingly tearing round all over the place, disregarding all of the yellow lines, boundary ropes & whatnot. Former colleague's son, about the same age, resting silently, unmovingly, angelically, in his dad's arms. Slightly exasperated & embarrassed by my little tyke's behaviour I made some comment to the other couple about how their son was a little angel. Turned out that the child was in fact very severely disabled, I think incapable of pretty much any movement. That was embarrassing.

InsomniacAnonymous · 06/01/2018 21:11

"I was explaining to my boss why I needed to postpone a task as “I had my hands full of Dick”, so embarrassed."

If you didn't mean that, what did you mean?

Busybusybust · 06/01/2018 21:13

To a friend of my son after the birth of his baby ‘ he looks just like your dad’. Too late I remembered that said friend was adopted!

fizzingwhizbee · 06/01/2018 21:13

I wrote an email to a colleague called Angus once.

Managed to miss the ‘g’ out of his name.

I don’t think I was ever able to look him in the eye again after that.

Geordie1944 · 06/01/2018 21:18

No-one believes the whiskery tale about the suppositories that would have done more good had the patient stuffed them up his arse, but this one is true - from a GP surgery where I worked as a counsellor. A lady had an asthmatic toddler who needed drug treatment, but who simply would not take pills or liquid medication and who screamed the place down at the sight of a needle. The child was really struggling, not least with badly inflamed nostrils and pharynx, so the doctor ordered up the medication in suppository form. "Now you he doesn't have to swallow these?" he said as he handed them over. At the follow-up a week later the toddler was no better, and the GP said "Is there a problem with the medication, do you think?" "Well", said the mum, "we have an awful job stopping them from sliding out of his nose....."