Just dropped a clanger - what are yours?

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I was talking over the web to someone I know about their mother's passing and finished off the conversation by saying drop me a line after the cremation when the dust has settled. I didn't even pick up my gaffe until their response repeating my line - they took it well!

Anyone else made an unintentional gaffe recently?

PeaceLove a friend of mine was shopping, sans DC, he automatically said "Daddy would like a receipt with that." The shopkeeper replied "I'm sure you would, sweet cheeks."

Not really dropping a clanger, more just inappropriate laughter at my Great Uncle’s funeral. It was a cremation, and the last song they played was My Way. Just as the line “and now, the end is near, I have reached the final curtain” was played they drew the curtain around the coffin. It was pure comic timing, I was nearly crying with trying not to laugh. Not very appropriate behaviour at a funeral. I always think of it and have a wee giggle to myself!

Someone was telling me once that the indicators on their car were playing up." Yes " he announced " they are on the blink !"
It was many yrs ago but i still laugh whenever i think about it even now !

a relatives old mum rubbed my belly and said ah when are u due

i just quietly said im not just a bit fat-she looked mortified

New Year's Eve was approaching a few years ago - ok many years ago! - and we were in the pub trying to decide what to do for it. We wondered about the pub we were in, as it was a nice one and quite busy. But a lot of them were ticket only, so we decided to ask.

So my friend goes up to the barman - think the sporty pizza dude from "the simpsons". And she actually says, "excuse me, what are you doing for New Year's Eve?"

And the blushing boy says, "sorry but I'm working that night!"

My sister got into a bit of a row with a friend about loyalty stamps (long, stupid, boring story). It ended in my sister storming away from her friend shouting “well, you can stick your old stamps!”

In local community centre when a woman came in carrying bottles of wine, sandwiches etc. I say cheerily, 'oooh a party, have fun!' She said 'well not really it's a wake. For my mum' 😫

She was so lovely though, she invited me in for a drink. I thought I'd better decline graciously and went and squirmed in the car

Oh I hope something goes awry at my funeral and people get the giggles! Not that I'm intending it to happen for a long time yet but I want to go out to laughter.

Not mine but when I worked in jewellery they used to offer us staff competitions for sales occasionally and one was for Storm watches. New staff member was determined to beat the rest of us and win the watch and was trying to sell storm to everyone, went down really well with the poor quadriplegic woman Luckily she was a regular customer for her husband and had a wicked sense of humour but will never forget colleagues face. (She didn't win either)

I work with a kid who is horrid to others. His name is Henry. Caught myself saying Don't be horrid Henry...

Said to my first boss, regarding a photographer who’d taken professional shots of us: “I hate my photo. I don’t know why he took me from below.” We both fell about.

Said to a colleague in his late 40s (thankfully not by me): “Have you thought about retiring?”

The day of my mums funeral, everyone had met at my mums house.

Someone asked my brother if his mum was well.....

Whos funeral she thought she was at, i will never know!!!

My mum is currently on her fourth husband. I was at her wedding to my dad, her wedding to my stepdad and their vow renewal. When she was marrying husband number 4, they were planning on going away to get married. My soon to be step sister was throwing a strop about not being able to go to the wedding as she couldn’t afford the festival tickets, flights and accommodation. Myself and my two brothers where the same. So my mum phoned to make sure I was ok with it being able to go to the wedding. I had answered a few tones that it was fine and I was ok with it. She kept pushing the subject and I replied, yeah it’s fine. I’ve seen you get married a few times before... she was less than impressed with my answer and didnt talk to me for a few days 😂 it was true but I didn’t mean to say it 🤣

I was once talking to one colleague about another. I said ‘He had some very interesting points to make about . . .’

Colleague replied: ‘Yes, SHE knows a lot about that.’

Argh. Argh. Argh.

At an old job I use to work at, I was steaming some clothes, a line manager came to have a chat (she was in her late 40s, and quite wrinkly for her age) and stood near the steam she said "oh this is so nice and warm" and i said "yes, let's straighten those creases out" she was gobsmacked and thought I meant her wrinkles, when i really meant her clothes , but I was bright red, and then made it worse and said "no you're fine you don't have a lot of wrinkles".

Made my supervisor laugh hysterically though.

i'd like people to laugh at my funeral too! Friend of mine, her sister was v heavily pregnant at their dad's funeral. She whispered to my friend ''if this was Eastenders, I'd have to go in to labour right now'' and they had a fit of giggles!

Many years ago I was invited for lunch at the house of a girl I'd met a few times on a course. When I left she came and waited with me at the bus stop. I looked up and pointed to the block of flats opposite saying, " God those are so ugly, who'd want to live there!" You can guess where she lived and she didn't look impressed!!

SabineUndine I don't understand. You didn't know what sex your colleague was?

Shoulddo, I'm confused - if you'd just had lunch with her at her 'house', surely you knew where she lived?!

Out with my boyfriend (now husband) several years ago for a meal. The waitress came over and asked if the meal was ok. He replies 'it's lovely, thank you' except he doesn't. He's says 'I love you' 😂 I'm in hysterics and she says 'erm, well you seem nice too' 😂

After a long hospital stat my grandmither died overnight. The next morning as my aunt arrived home the NDN greater her with a very cheerful 'so she's gone then'
My grandmother was scheduled to have an operation, which meant moving from the small local hospital to specialist unit which had been cancelled the day she died as she was too ill.

DaveGrohlsMrs

Not really dropping a clanger, more just inappropriate laughter at my Great Uncle’s funeral. It was a cremation, and the last song they played was My Way. Just as the line “and now, the end is near, I have reached the final curtain” was played they drew the curtain around the coffin. It was pure comic timing, I was nearly crying with trying not to laugh. Not very appropriate behaviour at a funeral. I always think of it and have a wee giggle to myself!

The EXACT same timing happened at my Grandads funeral!
He would have loved it! lol