'Saving' seats before they have food. WIBU

[mummymummums]

Me, DH, DD10 and DS9 all visited a Xmas market today. Lots of stalls, and a food area with various options. No actual seating provided but various benches dotted around and in rows. Queued for 15-20 mins, got food, and headed off to try to sit down - we all had a meal plus hot drink. I went and sat on an empty bench, but as the DC approached they were told 'I'm saving that for someone' by a woman on the end seat of the next bench. They diverted to the other side of me, to be told the same by a woman further up the next bench. I was and told them to sit down.
The woman started moaning that she was saving the seats for her friend who was getting her food. I pointed out that we had food there and then, and nowhere to sit.
She carried on getting indignant so I said she couldn't seriously think it was ok to deny people a seat on a public bench in favour of a friend who was nowhere to be seen and was still queuing for food. I pointed out I could have come and saved seats while DH queued, but that was unfair to people who had food. She then said "what the actual f^*•', right next to DD10 who had the seat nearest her, at which point I lost my shit. That shut her up.
We had finished eating by the time her friend appeared with the food 15 mins later, so I'm glad we didn't stand all the while the friend was queuing!
WIBU? Is it really ok to save public benches where other people have food, when you have no food???

They WBU. Unless it's table service you order your food first and then find a seat.

Good for you. I hate it when people do that.

This is an argument that will never be solved. I would never order food if I had nowhere to sit, and would be annoyed if I had planned ahead and sent someone to save a seat first and someone who hadn't bothered, pinched it.

She was being unreasonable. It’s not like she has any rights to a public bench, her friend wasn’t there so it’s tough titty

Some people like her have just forgotten what manners are I think

I hate it when people do this but you are about to be ranted at by lots of people who think it's ridiculous to not save a seat before you buy food

They WBU. Unless it's table service you order your food first and then find a seat.

Agree.

You were fine op.

I would have done as she did. Through disability I wouldn't be able to stand and queue.

I'd of course let you sit, but I would owe you an explanation as to why I was sitting.

It wasn't a table pengggwyn it was public benches, and her friend didn't appear the entire time we were eating. We had paid for our food, and got it, and if the seats are all taken up by people without food saving them it seems crazy to me.

I'm interested to know what you did when you "lost your shit". Presumably no swearing since your daughter was nearby and swearing in her vicinity is what triggered your rage.

But if you order food first and then find somewhere to sit, you have to accept you might not find anywhere and will end up standing around. Which is what happened here.

I mean, what would you have done had the bench actually been physically occupied? Possibly even by people not eating!

No Jenala I didn't swear.
To be clear I had no issue with her sitting there at all. She can sit where she wants. It was the seat saving for someone else, which meant we couldn't sit down if we'd complied. And the friend appeared after we'd finished eating anyway.

Yabu, i sit down. My friends, family, dh get my food.
Im disabled so can't stand for long.
However you wouldn't know to look at me and if you'd done that to me i would have simply said i was saving the seat.
Atleast you'lost your shit' and told her though.

No, no tables. Park bench style Pengggwyn, so lap food

How exactly did you lose your shit?

The seat savers sound like twats in this scenario, I think you were nbu.

But if they were public benches then surely anyone has the right to sit there regardless of whether they are eating or not! I think you were both unreasonable, but her especially actually as saving a public bench is just nuts and preventing a child sitting down seems bordering on bullying

YANBU. I can't be doing with seat 'saving', if your arse isn't physically there then there's no argument.

I join table bagsiers. If I am finished when the elusive friend turns up, all is well. If the friend turns up and I am not finished, I join the bagsier on the next table/ bench. Never had to move more than once.

I also join coats, bags and other luggage "sitting" there to bagsy a table. It is a form of queue jumping. The one person sitting there, fine. The empty seats for their friends, not fine.

well done OP. It sounds as if there was even room for her friend to sit down if she had arrived before you had all finished anyway! I just join people who save tables or benches now, call me anti-social if you like,

Lost my shit is probably much milder than you're imagining. I told her crossly that we were eating the food we had bought, and not to speak to me.
I have no problem with her sitting there eating or not. It was the seat saving.

YWNBU. I'd have told my children to sit down too.

Bagging tables while a friend queues always feels a bit offside.