absolutely fuming

[samidolls]

I've been to my 31 week midwife appointment today and got told to chase up my antenatal classes as I hadn't heard anything yet.

I have asked about these at previous appointments but was told I wouldn't hear anything until around 32 weeks.

I was put in for a local class run by community midwives and sent off the application as soon as I got it after my 16 week appointment. (so almost 4 months ago)

When I finally managed to get a call back frommy healthcare advisor I was told the classes had taken place in October and that I was the 9th to apply and they only have space for 8 but that nobody bothered to get in touch with me. The next classes they have start on the 12th of January so only a week before my due date! I asked what they suggested I do and was told some other local clinics have classes but "you probably won't get a place as they have to give priority to people in their catchment area."

So I called my midwife and was told to book with the hospital, finally get through to them and they tell me I need to book online. First available class is 14/1/18. I'm due 19/1/18!!

I've looked at NCT classes but there aren't any classes close by- the nearest being a 40min drive, I've requested info about these just in case, and booked onto the 14th January class at the hospital.

I don't know what to do, I've followed the advice of the midwives and now I've just been left out on a limb with no help from anybody, I know women had babies without antenatal classes for thousands of years but it's got me panicking slightly, I just feel like crying!

Its a good job my boss has been out of the office today as I've spent a good portion of it on the phone trying to get sorted!

I just can't believe nobody got in touch with me to tell us we hadn't got on the course! They could have told us months ago and I could have sorted something else out, I'm usually super organised and like to have things arranged as soon as possible but this was out of my hands and now I don't know what to do!

Can anybody suggest where else I can look for antenatal classes (based in Leeds btw).

I learnt 0 from my classes

I’m in Leeds, we did ‘Preparation for Birth and Beyond’ with DC1. Now pg with DC2 and the posters are still up. Maybe ask if they have these in your area, they’re not strictly ante-natal so may come under a different list. They were held in children’s centres and we were all 1st time parents at the most 32 weeks. I was the most pregnant and did the last two classes with a baby rather than a bump!

You don't really need them to give birth. Fir my first I got lots of helpful info from babycentre.co.uk. It had so much detail on everything to do with labour. Would be worth searching them out.

Awww samidolls, here's a virtual hug ((())) Lots of mums will tell you they are a big, fat waste of time. All I remember from mine is a big, red football sock was held up to represent the ripening cervix with a tennis ball inside to represent the baby. That doesn't change the fact that you wanted the opportunity to go. What about ringing other hospitals in your location to see if they have any classes before January? The information should be consistent after all.

NCT classes were described to me as a very expensive way of making new friends.

I didn’t do them. I didn’t feel any ill benefit.

It’s very annoying when you get out in situations like this that are totally out of your control, but please don’t panic, NCT classes are not essential.

I found mine totally pointless and cringe worthy. 5 weeks of utter drivel.

However at the hospital I was booked in at once a month the anaethetists took it in turns to do a 30 minute talk and then q&a about pain relief options in labour. That was to the point, evidence based information from very skilled professionals and really helped me in labour.

It might be worth checking if your hospital offers anything like that.

I felt at the time that the classes were really useful. Having actually had my baby, they were utter horse shite. I can't speak for everywhere obviously, but my area consisted of a lot of outdated information, and the feeding session was an absolute joke!! It only covered breast feeding (which was my personal choice, but what if it wasn't? There was NO information on bottles and formula, or on combi feeding), even then it was talking us through normal breast feeding. They didn;t give us any siigns to look out for that ight indicate things aren;t going so well, and the pamphlet we came away with had no contact information, or information about breastfeeding (or any kind of feeding) groups. So when I had my tongue tied, lip tied, cows milk protein intolerant baby, I was up the creek without a paddle. It took me weeks of being fobbed off to find the right information.

Sorry, that turned into a bit lot of a rant. It's still a raw nerve! In response to your actual post, antenatal classes are fab for meeting other parents due around the same time (I still have 4 friends out of a class of 10 that I met in group and our little ones are all pushing on 2 now). The information you receive might not be that comprehensive or up to date. As PP have recommended, see if the NCT run a bumps and babies group near you. I went to two different ones, and both were lovely, and gave me a lot more practical support and advice than the antenatal classes ever did.

My classes were only useful for making friends. The content was nothing I didn't already know/ couldn't have easily found online.

Mine started two weeks after DS1 was born. I was undecided whether to go at all so he made my mind up for me.

I learned precisely nothing at these shit classes. They’re honestly not worth it!

OP, if you get in touch with NCT again ask if they have a practitioner who can do a 1-2-1 session for you, maybe 2 hours, so you can get your main questions answered and then the practitioner may be able to put you in touch with other couples close to you as well.

I totally missed mine, I went into labour 3 months early they told me to think about what I’d learnt in the classes

I HAVENT HAD THE FECKING CLASSES THEY ARE MEANT TO BE NEXT WEEK

Needless to say all was fine (considering the circumstances) and I just put everything down to listening to myself, I don’t think I need classes for that

Try not to worry. I definitely got much much more info from reading forums than from the classes. It's strange they limit at 8, at mine there were about 20 pregnant women!

I'd have a good look at private classes to see if you can find something, just to set your mind at ease. I'd also get a hypnobirthing book, I definitely found reading mine (I hated the CD that came with it for some reason!) much more helpful than the classes.

I can understand why you're upset - you feel like you've missed out on an opportunity to learn something and get support even if they do tend to be a bit meh. I know you can get weekend courses for couples privately and these will cover off the same sorts of stuff - they do tend to be pricey too so might not be an option (although NCT aren't free either). But your fume is justified! YANBU!

There used to be a free book called birth to five I think which was great - it had terrific no nonsense information - do they still give that out?

The only things I can recall from my antenatal classes:

1. Yes you can drink and breastfeed - although the greatest risk factor is dropping the baby pissed (NOT SURE THIS WAS GREAT ADVICE TBH)
2. If you have a C Section there will be a lot of people in the room all of a sudden
3. After the baby arirves you still have to push out the placenta
4. Erm. Nope. Can't remember anything else apart from one annoying woman who trilled on and on about "bean" (her baby). bean does this, bean does that... Needless to say we're not still in touch with the bean parents.

I went to the NHS one at the hospital and I didn't learn anything much beyond the bleedin' obvious. My first dd was born in January as well.
So a lot of trailing around to lessons in the snow whilst 36 weeks pregnant, getting through the Xmas shopping traffic. I persevered because, maybe like you, I didn't want to miss out on anything that was 'very important' for me to know. There was nothing. I didn't even make any friends.

I'd agree with a pp who said the most useful thing was a tour of the maternity ward.
With Dd1, we went along and learnt bugger all but did get to go and see where the baby would be born. This was so helpful, just meant it was all a lot clearer in my head and thee was a lot less to worry about.
We did also watch a video about breast feeding,mother most notable sequence of which showed a baby lying on the floor while mum was on hands and knees over the top of it dangling her boob into its mouth. It was supposed to show the number of ways there are to breastfeed. I never tried that one - apart from anything else you can't drink your tea in that position.
With DD2 we had moved, no classes were on offer, and we genuinely only realised last minute that we had no idea where the maternity bit of the hospital was, so did a dry run about 3 weeks before... Didn't get to see inside it though.

I think it's worth seeing if you can tour your maternity ward. Just gives you an idea of where things are, what the arrangements are for meals etc, all of which is handy to know when you are in pain with a tiny person to look after and you have no idea what the hell is going on!

Mine was a few days before my due date, not sure why that's a problem? Waste of time anyway.

I went to one ante-natal class, then the midwife running them left and was never replaced. Still managed to have a baby ok.

The information you get in antenatal class is of minimal use. Go to a pregnancy yoga (or what ever) class and meet other pregnant people to hang out with.

Waste of bloody time. The first one they talked about getting pregnant and how the baby grew, seemed odd to tell a room full of heavily pregnant women about what had already happened. My son was born early so I missed the class about labour and delivery.

I agree they are a waste of time.
Although they might be better now - mine were 20 years ago!

All I remember from mine was to try to relax your shoulders when you're trying to get to sleep in pregnancy as you can't sleep if you're not relaxed and if you're shoulders are tense you're not relaxed. Or something like that. Not that you sleep in pregnancy anyway. But I do still consciously relax my shoulders to go to sleep now, 20 years later.
I managed to give birth to and raise 4 babies only remembering that, so I really wouldn't worry. But I would be annoyed.

To be honest your not missing much, when I went with my first pregnancy the midwife said I won’t tell you how to do breathing exercises as your soon find out for yourself when your in labour.

Needless to sa I didn’t both with my second pregnancy.

All I remember is a woolly doll being shoved through a plastic replica of a pelvis. I'd thought of the baby coming out through something resembling a funnel before that, so it just made me more apprehensive. The other mothers were very nice though and we all kept in touch for a while.

I thought they were a waste of time. I went to themidwife ones and DH and I went to an NCT weekend course. Waste of money. I leraned more from google, youtube, Mnet and One Born Every Minute.