To think this is a total invasion of privacy? (New boyfriend searching my details at work)

[Kellyopio]

I started dating someone 7 weeks ago.
I work part time in a office and also look after my gran who is 93 with dementia.
I live in a council property at the moment and get help with housing benefit.
I didn't want to get into great detail with him so just said I work office work.
He is a housing officer for a local council (25 mins away from me) different council tho.
He has never been to my house and I've never given him my address.
Sunday we were going for a meal and I was in town so I said it's ok to pick me up from town.
I got in his car he said driving was a nightmare it would of been easier to pick you up from (my address)
I've never told him my address and he keeps asking questions about work and hours I do and housing benefit etc
I think he's been searching my details.
Would you be annoyed?

He sounds hideous. Dump him by text and block him on your phone and all apps. Report him by letter to his employer stating you believe his has used his access to systems to find out your address. It will be very clear to his employer whether or not he has done this so you don't have to worry in case he hasn't actually done it. If he has, it's gross misconduct. It actually doesn't bear thinking about the misuse to which he could have put this illegally obtained information.

I find it strange that you could be dating a guy for seven weeks and never once mention where you live.

in this situation, OP, I would log a complaint with his employer and consider notifying the police. I only suggest this because his behaviour is stalkers and verging on controlling so soon.

you also have this option to find out if there is history of domestic violence www.met.police.uk/advice-and-information/domestic-abuse/clares-law-and-requesting-domestic-violence-offender-data/

his current behaviour would be enough of a concern to warrant you doing so.

Again WRITE a formal complaint to his employer that you believe he has searched your details on their data base.

If you are a housing association your housing officer may be a good person to contact about this too.

It hasn't been like 7 weeks of constant dates.
Altogether it's been about 6 dates only on Saturdays and a gap of 2 weeks between 3rd and 4th as I was on a mini break with friends.

It's scary to me to think anyone can find out anything about you just by your name and DOB

No they can’t. If it is on a confidential file at work he is acting criminally to gain unauthorised access.

That's a point... I just put my name and date of birth into Google and the first hit was my Facebook profile. (I have a very common name, along the lines of Jane Smith.)
Perhaps he's just been snooping on Facebook. I would if I was dating someone!

If you told him you work full time and you only work part time he might try reporting you for benefit fraud

You should really report him but tbh I'd just dump him and breathe a sigh of relief that you didn't get sucked in.

Even if he knew the street you lived on through none creepy means there is still enough here to justify dumping him m

1. Not keen

2 Judgemental 3 Boring as repeats himself. 4 He thinks he can already tell you what to do 5 He is trying to control what you eat

Etc etc etc

Work will be able to track his computer searches. So if your suspicions are groundless he won't lose his job

He sounds like a creep and you need to dump him

Kelly, don't see him again, we can't all be wrong !
He is a control freak, you are worth so much more Lovely.

I worked in local authority housing for many years and yes, we could look up a tenants' details even if they lived in another borough. Anywhere across the country. It's simple to ring through and get checks done - staff don't have to say why, it's assumed it's work related. Nowadays you'd likely not even have to ring thru.

I knew of people who would nose into other peoples' tenancy occupation/benefit details for various personal reasons. It's disgusting. We are all more vulnerable than we know. Access to landlord details too, not just tenancies

It's be an absolute and immediate dumping offence for me.

Dump him and complain, saying you believe it to be a breach of data protection. The only possible good reason I can think of him finding out your address innocently would be if someone he works with is a neighbour of yours. Though the other questions make me think it very unlikely.

Thanks everyone for your advice.
Not sure what he was hoping to find out from searching me but never mind.

dump him, block him then report him. He sounds absolutely awful!

What a twat! What you do, how often you work, your benefits, your life... is NONE of his business. Having said that, I will ask you to be careful about the way you dump his arse. You don't need any more trouble from him.

He sounds like an arsehole.

Have you done anything yet OP?

Please say you're reporting this cretin

Well he didn't text me yesterday or today so I'm hoping he is just going to gradually disappear and save me having to "dump" him.
I'm unsure about reporting him as I don't have any evidence,and I don't want to cause trouble,as I've only known him a short space of time.
He might be a total nutter and I worry incase he might turn nasty.

Plus with him actually knowing my address ..scares me a bit just incase.

If he’s used a work database to search for you then he’s unlawfully accessed your data and could be prosecuted. If he hadn’t but has pieced it together through social media/192 records then he’s clearly trying to fill in the blanks is areas you’re being evasive. I don’t think I’d date someone if I couldn’t be open with them about my circumstances and vice versa

Maybe you can report him anonymously, so his manager can still check on him without him knowing why or who reported it?

Someone has just been prosecuted and fined for snooping around in people’s files. There’s usually an electronic audit trail.