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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Dh made me feel like shit

183 replies

Vickytoria72 · 02/11/2017 10:15

Dh and I have 2dc a 6yr ds and 21mth ds. So my dh gets home from work sits down and the first thing he says to me is "you know that I love you". Now that got me wondering what he wanted/had done, he then looked at my stomach and without saying it implied I was fat. At first I was stunned then I had to leave the room and have a cry in the bathroom, he did come up stairs and apologise which I wasn't ready to accept. He knows how self conscious I am of my body at the best of times. It just took me back to when I was was bullied at school. I know my body is far from perfect, but I've only gone up from a size 12 to a 14 since we've been together. Aibu to still be upset with him.

OP posts:
PandorasXbox · 02/11/2017 11:34

Misogyny alive and well I see Hmm

falnui · 02/11/2017 11:35

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Lethaldrizzle · 02/11/2017 11:36

Falnui er no!
'She could be sweet 16, bustin' out at the seams - it's still love in the first degree' and 'we love our love in different sizes'

ButchyRestingFace · 02/11/2017 11:38

It sounds to me like he was limbering up to say something but never got the chance.

He was wise not to pursue it.

BarbarianMum · 02/11/2017 11:38

hollow do you also think your husband would be "beautiful and desirable at any weight"? I must be really shallow because I wouldn't, and I definitely don't look better when obese.

ExConstance · 02/11/2017 11:38

I'm 61 and believe me when your old school friends are starting to die off with cancer or having their hips replaced it really does concentrate the mind on being as healthy as you can. Years ago I did get upset if I put on weight because of how I looked and then I couldn't keep it off on a permanent basis, I think the health argument is more convincing to the inner self.

lynmilne65 · 02/11/2017 11:41

God you do all go on 🙄

messyjessy17 · 02/11/2017 11:41

It sounds to me like he was limbering up to say something but never got the chance

Is no-one else thinking though that it could have been anything? OP says he looked at her stomach, but he could have just been unable to look her in the eye.
It could have been "You know I love you....." but I cheated. Or I secretly cross dress. Or I ate all your chocolate stash. Or anything?

Bluntness100 · 02/11/2017 11:41

Time to get out a ruler and measure his willy Haha amazing! This made my day

You’re clearly easily pleased. Amazing, really? For me it was immature and shit advice. What will he do in retaliation, get the speculums out?

To be fair the guy couldn’t have been any more sensitive other than not to mention it, which it seems to some posters is the only way to manage it. Kid on its not happening, fancy her whatever and not give a shiny shit about health implications.

DunkMeInTomatoSoup · 02/11/2017 11:43

Whats a 'legal midget' and O/T are there illegal ones too ?

lynmilne65 · 02/11/2017 11:44

14 ‘obese’ you’re nuts

falnui · 02/11/2017 11:46

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messyjessy17 · 02/11/2017 11:46

Still wrong, muppet.

Vickytoria72 · 02/11/2017 11:46

By the way I'm 5'3 and 11 stone over weight not obese. I do have that over hang you can get when you have a c-section.

OP posts:
ThymeLord · 02/11/2017 11:48

What health implications are there for someone who is a size 14 when you have no idea what height they are?

PandorasXbox · 02/11/2017 11:48

Do you want to lose weight OP? Is it something you’ve talked about with him previously or did the intimation come out of the blue?

falnui · 02/11/2017 11:49

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LagunaBubbles · 02/11/2017 11:49

OP have you spoke to him now?

ThymeLord · 02/11/2017 11:50

Nobody cares what you think faluni.

PandorasXbox · 02/11/2017 11:51

Falnui why are you being deliberately hurtful?

falnui · 02/11/2017 11:52

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username7979 · 02/11/2017 11:53

I am just wondering if you are terribly insecure. he just looked at your stomach and you jump to the conclusion that he is saying you are fat?
If you feel you are, then act upon it. And expects him to support you.
But by the way 14 is an healthy weight, obviously with how tall you are in mind.

hollowtree · 02/11/2017 11:53

Barbarian yes, I'm afraid I would!

Bluntness It was just a joke comment, it made me laugh! I guess I am easily pleased... better than easily annoyed!

falnui · 02/11/2017 11:54

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Weebo · 02/11/2017 11:54

Post a selfie falnui.

G'wan - I've always wanted to see what delusion perfection looks like.