...to think it's possible to go back to work full time after mat leave?

[Jumperoux]

Would work 37 hours over 4 days with DD in nursery. Every other week she would be in nursery on the 5th day of the week so I can do overtime. She'll be 12 months and a bit.

Please give me your best tips. I'm hoping to still be breastfeeding morning/bedtime. I've heard that without daytime feeds then babies can start waking more in the night when mother goes back to work? And the idea of leaving the house for 7:20 fills me with dread. Will I be expected to give her breakfast before nursery? Any tips more than welcome. Wondering if I've made a mistake saying I'll go full time.

Has your dh given much thought to a career change now? Since his job is both demanding and low paid, unless he loves it perhaps it's worth him looking for something more family friendly now rather than waiting a few years for your salary to increase.

My previous boss went back after three months and she continued breast feeding. She went back five days I worked 7-7.

With a good support system you can do it :D

My Current boss works five days a week and I work 8-6:30 so it’s

In terms of food / meals, mine get the following.... until they drop milk (which was 22 mths for my eldest)...up at 5:45, 6:00 bottle milk, start Nursery at 7:30, breakfast when they get there, cooked main meal at lunch time which is 11:30, 14:00 is afternoon snack (biscuit/veg sticks etc),15:30 tea - which is sandwiches, wraps, soup, crackers and cheese and fruit etc. Late afternoon snack at 17:15, then I pick up at 18:00. Come home and have fruit and yoghurt or toast. Bath then milk before bed when we were still giving bottles. Now they both dropped bottles instead of milk they have a small bowl of cereal with us at 6:00 as we’re eating ours anyway, then still have a full breakfast at Nursery 😊 So I don’t cook them a meal Monday - Fri but they do have yoghurt, fruit, toast etc when they come in as Nursery tea is early.

I wouldn’t stop BF. Neither of mine reverse cycled (DS1 continued sleeping through; DS2 continued to be rubbish). May be complete coincidence but they both missed the ‘catch lots of bugs at nursery’ phase that so many seem to experience. Also- starting nursery may lead to her being unsettled/poor sleep regardless- and then you have an unsettled child but you’ve lost your best tool (BF) for settling her!

I went back to work when DS was 6 months 3 days a week, then quite quickly moved to 4 days and now work full-time (different job) - he is 3 next months - I've been full time for about a year.

What's worked for us:

• my job is v demanding (monthly travel, crisis management which can strike on weekends, short deadlines) but very flexible. We have unlimited sick leave and a very flexible work policy. I work from home every Friday and occasionally other days if I need to
• short commute: my work is a 10 -15 min drive from home
• crèche nearby (5 min drive/15 min walk) 3 days a week
• nanny 2 days a week - means you don't have to worry about sickness as much and 2 fewer drop off/pick up days
• no culture of presenteeism at work. If I need to pick up DS I'm gone by 5 at the latest. I log in at home later if I need to.
• delegate as much as possible - so we have cleaner, outdoor maintenance etc, dog walker etc. I know this is a luxury to be able to throw money at the problem
• DH pulling his weight. He was frankly shit in the early days but is now properly hands on and doesn't treat me as the default parent which used to cause some huge arguments.

Reading this back I realise we're really lucky.

I think 37 hours over 4 days would be tough though - I'd rather do 5 days with shorter hours. Any chance you could do a day at home? Saves commute and feels a lot less stressful.

You both will be fine once the routine is established. I picked a nursery near my work so was easier to pick up. DS went in 4 days a week at 3 months old and whilst hard for me at first, he was fine

I went back to work full time and my DD went into nursery full time from 11 months.

Positives:
She settled into nursery in about a week and a half as she was going in every day-much less than those babies who went part time.

She has become such a good eater as she was using cutlery herself really early and eats well with lots of other friends around her, rather than the one on one struggle a lot of parents have when mealtimes come around.

She has been learning to do things I probably wouldn’t have thought to teach her if with me like holding a pen properly already and drawing circles/squares etc.

It was so much easier to potty train with her at nursery 5 Days a week!

I am able to afford to do and go to lots of things at the weekend with her.

The time we do spend together is a really happy time and I found myself getting frustrated less and less than when I was with her 24/7. Also, the night wake ups were easier when I went back to work, for some reason! Those who think the ‘dad’ needs his sleep as he has work in the morning have no idea how much easier it is to go to work on little sleep than it is to look after a baby on little sleep. It was a revelation to me!

OP, you will be fine. Some bits will be stressful, such as dealing with time off for a poorly baby but overal, going back full time is not the awful thing some people fear it is.

Hi OP, it is possible I have been doing it. I went back to work full time when DS1 was 10 months old. Working 37.5 hours over 4days. It was good for our family situation, was good for work and meant I wasn't doing lots of unpaid overtime each week. As pp's have said preparing your work clothes, bags, lunch and baby stuff before hand is essential. Always have at least one extra outfit ready including tights if you wear them. DS projectile vomited all over me just as we were walking out the door and the only work appropriate clothes I could find we're maternity clothes which by then looked like a tent. Also don't send dc to nursery in expensive clothes. They come home covered in food, paint and god knows what else! Good luck

I did it and DS was 5 months. Dropped him at nursery at 7:30 and picked him up at 5:30 five days a week. Gave him a bottle at home but he had breakfast at nursery.

He's 23 now with a degree, a good job, lots of friends, social life, loving, generous etc etc

I managed it all, DH worked away all week, your baby will be gone and you will manage if you are organised.

I did wean off the breast before I went back though.

Of course it is. I did it both times. Carried on feeding too, fed ds1 until 18m after going back at 11m. Could have kept going except wanted to stop before ttc again.

You and baby will be fine.

Of course it is. I went back 4 days a week when DS was a year old. Could've done 5 but preferred to spend an extra day with him and glad I did.

He finds nursery tiring but he does lots of exciting new things and is developing fast.

Re food, it depends i think. I really recommend finding one that provides them with all their meals. We give him a bottle when he wakes, he nibbles a piece of toast while I'm having breakfast if there's time
, and then nursery gives him breakfast.

If possible maybe consider flexing your hours so you can pick her up and get her home in good time in the afternoon / evening. Where I work quite a few mums do 8-4.30 for this reason. Don't stress if it's not possible obviously.

My son went to nursery full time at 8 months. I carried on breastfeeding in the morning and evening until he was 15 month old. He absolutely loves nursery and is a sweet and loving lad. His sleeping didn't get worse, the opposite in fact (just because he's getting older, I assume).

My husband went into nursery full time at a similar age, and he's ace, so I'm not too worried. I do miss my son immensely though, but my industry doesn't really do part-time hours, and a career break means career death.

PS oh sorry just realised you plan 37 hours over 4 days. I can't comment on that as its not an option for me, but should be doable especially if you have some support

I work full time. DD is six months old. Perfectly possible.

It is totally possible.

I went back full time when dd was 7 months. She refused expressed milk from a bottle so she went on to formula during the day which she would take from a bottle and I carried on feeding her when I was at home and at weekends - once in the morning, a couple of times in the evening and once at night. We kept up the breastfeeding until 14 months that way. I hadn’t wanted to formula feed at all and was so sad about the store of frozen expressed milk I had compiled going to waste BUT she is obviously absolutely fine and it worked for us! You just need to work out what will work for you

I did 40 hers from my daughter being 5 months old. You will be fine

Of course it's possible and she is not a Mewling newborn

Just have some Plan A and B up sleeve for when she is sick (and hopefully she won't be !!)

My friend is a pilot and still BFs her 2.5 year old!

I can't advise as I was very poor at BFing and don't work full time, but clearly it is doable! Good luck OP! :)

Yes it's fine. I went back ft when dd was 8 months. She was in nursery 5 days a week and loved it. Dh and I both work ft Mon to Fri 9 to 5, so very traditional hours thst fit in well with nursery.

It's possible but you may want to consider switching to bottle feeding. If you end up getting at night to breastfeed her you will be too tired to work properly.

Totally possible if your Nursery is open enough hours for your long days. I’m not sure how you divide 37 by 4 but if Nursery hours work that’s great.
I’d be very reluctant with a child that young to do the overtime on the fifth day - do you really have to?

It's perfectly possible to work full time, use a nursery and continue to breastfeed. I worked FT with the first 2 and part time with the last one - they all continued to BF and in fact DS3 continued to BF until just past his 3rd birthday! So it certainly isn't a problem.

I fed them in the morning and when we got home, then again as part of the bedtime routine. They all thrived at nursery and it meant I was able to return to work confident they were being looked after.

I found that DD dropped her daytime feeds when she started nursery (they tried to get her to have milk in a cup or bottle during the day - she wasn't having it!) and she ended up just feeding first thing and last thing. Which is ok for a nearly 1 year old IMO. If you co-sleep, I guess your baby may feed more in the night.

My son is almost 4 and I have been back at work full time since he was 10 months old. I am a teacher so I work 5 days and it is a demanding job.

The first couple of months were hard trying to get into the routine and the inevitable bouts of illness when the start nursery. However, once we got into it, it's been fine.

DS absolutely loves his nursery, has some really close friends there and does so many different activities - the things they do with them amaze me!

It's also been good for me - I have continued my career, developed my skills and got a promotion since I returned which had I had a break/been part time would have been less likely to happen (might not be the case everywhere though).

In addition, my husband was unfortunately made redundant last year and my full time salary has been vital to us. Clearly this won't happen to everyone (and I hope it doesn't) but worth considering.

I find being organised is the key thing - usual things like making sure bags are packed at night, dealing with paperwork as soon as you get it and keeping a diary for all commitments (I use my phone which is also linked to my work calendar).

I would say, give it a good go for 6 months and if it really isn't working then, re-evaluate.

Good luck!

I had to leave the house at 7am for work with mine which I was dreading but by that age he was waking up at 6am everyday anyway so it actually felt like a less early start than before I had the baby...
The most stressful thing for me was definitely getting up to a poorly baby and having to cancel work stuff as he wasn't allowed in nursery.
I did give him breakfast first - he loved his food and also we had a long drive to the nursery.