If there's not enough food for everyone you don't choose favourites?

[apintofmilk]

I may well be being unreasonable. But I'm due a period and grumpy and hormonal. Oh and dieting.
So we went to my mums for roast dinner tonight. She knows I'm on a diet and I've been really good all week so I can enjoy a naughty home cooked roast which I've said numerous times.
Anyway we all sat down and my mum said "this ones apintofmilk's". I thought nothing of it until the end of the meal when I see my husband, sister and her husband all appear to have stuffing balls AND Yorkshire puddings on their plate and the other 3 adults (my mum dad and me) and 2 kids (too little to have stuffing to be honest) do not.
So I got a bit pissy and asked why and was told that there wasn't enough for everyone so they weren't bothered re not having any and they decided out of everyone else that I should go without. I said "well did you not think of halving Yorkshire puddings, or giving one person stuffing and one yorkshires" and they just answered "no".
I went mad. I just feel like I'm constantly bottom of the pile and was fucking annoyed they thought I should be the one to go without (not to drip feed my sister is also on a diet as we go together so nothing to do with me dieting).
Surely if you don't have enough food for all your guests then everyone should go without and they could have had the stuffing balls and yorkshires mid week on their own.
Also fuming that they tried to hide it from me and didn't explain at the start, they just tried to be sneaky and hoped I didn't notice.
Please tell me I'm not being unreasonable. I know how lucky I am that I even have a family that invite us to dinner etc etc. But tonight really fucking annoyed me.

Chicken and boiled vegetables?! Where were the roast potatoes? Can you even call it a proper roast dinner without roast potatoes.

It all sounds weird but maybe they gave you less food as they knew you would be busy feeding the kids and it would all get cold anyway .

Oh cross post - there were minimal roast potatoes then. Still not great.

Next time, why not take along a bag of stuffing balls and a packet of yorkshire puddings. It really sounds like your parents are struggling to keep feeding 7? extra people. Do any of you help cook or contribute to the cost?

Yeah there were roast potatoes. But the kids stole most of mine as they're a bit fussy with boiled veg, and I wanted them to have some carbs rather than just a plate of chicken.

Why not tell your kids to be polite and just eat the veg? It was boiled, not flambé in arsenic . No need to martyr your roasties for them. I do agree your parents were rude in how they dished up, but it also sounds like both you and your children were expecting some gourmet Sunday roast rather than appreciation for having anything cooked for you. Sounds like next Sunday dinner will be hosted by you, so you can show them how to do it 'properly'?

I have lived in a lot of places and never heard them called that and affected, because whoever thinks it's cute or clever. It jars when I read it

I’ve lived in 4 counties and 8 counties. Where I live currently (and grew up, actually) is the only one of those where I’ve heard them called Yorkies. That doesn’t make it wrong.

Your kids didn't steal your food. You gave it to them.

Can't believe how many people think the acceptable thing to do with 6 extra pieces of food at a meal is give 2 each to the chosen three and none to others.

Glad I don't know you and have to eat with any of you, frankly... and the idea the OP should be grateful to people so obviously treating her poorly is crazy.

YANBU, op.

Believe me I do try to get them to eat veg. Every meal time I put at least one vegetable item on their plate but my daughter in particular will put it in her mouth and gag until she's almost sick. Instead I now blend up veg into soups or do spag Bol and purée the sauce to hide the veg. You can't force a kid to eat something though.

Are your parents struggling for cash? It sounds like they couldn’t afford to feed 7 people.
FWIW I think it was very poor of them to split the food as they did. I just can’t imagine ever kicking off like that.

Yanbu op, family and food is really emotive and clearly being treated so differently from your sister, when she's in the exact same circumstances, really hit a sore spot for you.

this is sooo not about the food - this is about apintofmilk being treated differently from the others who were there

forget yorkshires/stuffing and switch it for .... going to the cinema, OP can only sit at the back behind a post and can only see half the film and look after all the children - rest of the family sit up front in luxury with popcorn and coke.... and at no time does anyone think about switching with her.... (its a totally crap analogy, but i cant think of anything better)

this is another nail in the coffin - not a one off where she is treated like a second class citizen

Also why can’t you your kids eat stuffing????

The whole experience sounds like an unhealthy, food based, spiteful nightmare. If you do get an invitation in future, you don't have to go y'know.

yabu to get upset over frozen yorkshires.
however if there is any justice you will lose more than your sister

It really sounds like your parents are struggling to keep feeding 7? extra people.

Seriously? I've been pretty poor, it's never stopped me being able to divide up what little I had fairly.

Seems strange your mum and dad didn't have Yorkshire puds or stuffing.

As PP have said are they short of cash? Cooking for 6 plus kids can be expensive. Or maybe they can't get out to get the shopping in?

If I was your parents making a Sunday dinner for you all, I'd make sure I'd get the best bits on my plate!

I wondered that BrieAndChilli, my 3 and 2 year olds lobe stuffing! They’re pretty fussy eaters so I had no idea eating stuffing was unusual...

Can't believe how many people think the acceptable thing to do with 6 extra pieces of food at a meal is give 2 each to the chosen three and none to others.

Quite!

They are very much not struggling for cash. 3 pensions, no mortgage, numerous foreign holidays. In fact they're very generous when it comes to my kids. Just not me.

I'd be grateful if my parents ever invited my DC's and I over for a meal, never mind getting huffy about a Yorkshire..

Annoying but really not a big deal. Think of all those calories you've saved!

So they don't eat veg and you reward them with you roasties - are you mad!

Yabu I am afraid - unless you wanted cutted up yorkies

You where fed a nice roast - you are dieting - she did u a favour

Next time stay game and cook it yourself

I think your parents were rather bad hosts so no I don't think you are being unreasonable...

However my 1 and 3 year old absolutely love stuffing. Actually I think they think it's the best bit of the roast lol

Well they can have stuffing and they have in the past, I just presumed it was a bit salty to eat on a regular basis. I may be wrong though!

Your parents are unreasonable for hosting but not cooking nearly enough food. Are they struggling for money?
It's very easy and inexpensive to whip up a batch of Yorkshire puddings and enough roasties that everyone has plenty.