Your friend smokes - Big deal! Is she the only person in your life that smokes OP? Are you really this intolerant to those who have different ideals to yourself? You come across as extremely precious tbh!
I have never considered contemplating whether someone smokes or not as to whether I give them a lift or not. What a weird, entitled life you lead...
I don’t think the OP was being specifically judgemental of the fact her friend smokes, she was merely saying she didn’t like it when she lit a fag right before getting into her car.
If someone has just put a ciggie out, they smell of fresh fags and that smell will transfer to your upholstery (just because you can’t smell it doesn’t mean other people can’t, depends on your sense of smell). The same way when you put perfume on and then get dressed the smell of perfume can transfer to your clothes and the clothes can still smell of it after you take them off.
I used to smoke and always tried to be respectful of other people and their homes/property etc and if that meant I had to wait to have a cigarette then I would wait. Maybe it’s because I didn’t start smoking until I was 26 and had hated smoking up until that point so I actively tried to consider non smokers when lighting up (to this day I don’t know why I started smoking, just that it involved a cruise and lots to drink 
, but glad I quit)
I don’t think she’s being precious by not wanting her car to stink of fags. And if someone has just finished a cigarette her car WILL smell of fags after they’ve been in it.
Why is she expected to be tolerant of her friends wish to smoke, but the friend shouldn’t be tolerant of her wish not to? It works both ways!