To refuse lift to smoker because she smells?

[florapearl]

Obviously not as blunt as that but she lights up just before getting in the car and it stinks. So AIBU to tell her to get the bus if she can't wait?

BTW, despite being an ex smoker my sense of smell is very good.

I agree U2. Ds smokes and I used to. He doesn’t smoke in the house or the car, when he comes in from having a cig I can smell it but only for a few seconds, it’s certainly not lingering around in the air or on the furniture. The same goes for when I give him a lift after he’s had one. I can smell it but not for long and in no way does that smell stay in the car.

The drama from some posters is verging ridiculous.

Had my hair cut last week by my lovely hairdresser, who unfortunately has a fag between clients. She smells very strongly of smoke, I hold my breath when she is leaning near my face and I wish she wouldn’t. No one will ever tell her though. And she is great at her job other than this.

It's to with positive and negative ions so the car of a non smoker will end up attracting the smell and it will cling to everything and also damage your lungs. They'd need to shower and wear clean clothes to even hope of not making your car smell! Just explain that you don't want things picking up the smell of cigarettes.

Not unreasonable in the slightest! My husband smokes but refuses to admit he absolutely reeks of fags 😖 the only time he’s allowed in my car, is with a vape and no sneaky cigs beforehand

For many people - myself included - it’s an actual nauseating smell rather than merely an unpleasant one. So I’m with the OP about not closeting herself in a small space with someone who smells so horrible to her.

But some people smell of smoke more strongly than others. When I was about 4 I wriggled out of a hug from my dad as he smelt of smoke. He quit his 40 day habit then and there.

I later learned my mother was most offended I didn’t say the same to her but I couldn’t smell it on her.

YA so NBU. I have no relatives or friends that are smokers because I ditch any friends that smoke. My dad was a chain smoker and our house, growing up, reeked so as an adult, I decided not to put up with it. I absolutely hate the smell of smoke but I'm happy to muck out animal poo as that just washes off your clothes and doesn't linger at all.
I won't buy a car or house that someone has smoked in. My poor sister spent years redecorating her entire house to rid the stench of stale fag smoke. You still get the odd feint whiff.
Smokers who think that drowning themselves in perfume helps to mask the stink are completely delusional.

YANBU to not want a smoker in your car. I don't think smokers actually realise how much they absolutely stink of smoke, it's a kind of lingering smell that just clings to them and their clothes.
I don't know how you'd go about saying you don't want to give a lift though as they smell, I couldn't be so blunt as it sounds mean!
I'd just make up an excuse why they couldn't.

It's a vile smell, all smokers stink no matter what they think. It's not about being precious, you just reek smokers! Your breath stinks, your clothes stink, you stink. So no OP YANBU!

Wow!
Life is so short and so precious.
All these types of posts just reinforce the bitchy over mindless matters!
Your car, your rules but I would rather get the bus than have a petty friend!

Yanbu! It smells filthy but what's worse is that it's not just an odour- it coats and clings and impregnates everything, and why should nonsmokers put up with it? It's selfish of smokers to inflict it on others but most don't care.
If I were you I'm not sure what I'd do because I'm a soft touch, but the smell gets up my sinuses and triggers the worst migraines so I'd probably have to use that as my 'excuse' anyway.

I used to smoke and quit nearly 4 years ago and can really notice the smell myself now when I smell it on others.

It does leave a lingering smell on things. And as a non smoker your nose will be so much more sensitive to it. So I can totally understand where you’re coming from.

I have a neighbour who smokes who will come and chat to me when I’m getting in my car sometimes and I hate it because I’m conscious that the fag smoke is wafting in and stinking up my car and clothes! So I’ve resorted to pretending not to see him if he’s getting out of his car or waiting until he’s in his car before I get into mine. Stupid really, but one of the reasons I quit smoking was because it made me stink, so I don’t want other people’s fag smoke causing me to stink of fags again if I can help it.

I had a similar issue with a friend who has a dog however. Her dog is white and covers everything in white dog hairs. Whenever I’ve picked this friend up she’s got into my car and after she’s got out my (black) seats are covered with white dog hair and the seat smells of doggy too. But she’s one of my best friends so I didn’t have the heart to avoid offering her a lift at times as I know she’d be mortified and feel utterly awful if I’d made an issue of it. So I just sucked it up and cleaned the car. But it wasn’t like she was in it often to be fair.

I think it depends on how close you are to this person. Could you politely ask them not to light up before you give them a lift? End of the day it’s your car. Who you choose to have in it is entirely up to you. But I think if you feel this strongly about it, you either have to stop giving them lifts or be honest and ask them not to have a ciggie right before they get in your car.

Back when I was a smoker I certainly wouldn’t have been offended by a friend asking me not to light up before getting in their car. It’s their car, if I want a lift I have to respect their wishes.

It’s doesnt linger on clothes and furniture from someone that has had a cigarette and then come into the house. That’s just nonsense.

Pandora yes, it does. If you're a heavy smoker, you go into someone's house to visit and sit on the sofa for a few hours with a cup of tea and a biscuit and a chat or whatever, when you go home it absolutely DOES linger.
The stale fag smell can even be faintly on the sofa the next day. No exaggeration,

I've got a nose like a bloodhound and can smell a smoker a mile off. We recently stayed in a holiday cottage and the bedding/towels all smelt of smoke. It was overwhelming and I had to wash all of it. We let the cottage owner know, and it transpired that the linen had been transported in a car which someone had been smoking in. That was probably weeks before, but the smell was really strong to me unfortunately. If you've got a strong sense of smell (and smoking impairs your sense of smell which is probably just as well) it is so unpleasant.

I'm with the OP.

If you give credit to the scientific evidence, particles from cigarettes are suspended in the air, and cling to clothing and furnishings. So - apart from the smell which lingers forever - you might be getting unwanted deposits in your car along with all the other pollutants we have no choice but to breathe!

I'm an ex-smoker and I don't think you're being unreasonable at all. I've had my 2nd hand car for 3 years and it still stinks of stale smoke on warm days, from the previous owner. I've been packed in 7 years and now hate it (to be honest I hated it whilst I smoked too, but was addicted). I also work with children with disabilities and it's shocking how much clothes/wheelchairs/bags/swimming kits/children/coats of some children stink of smoke - and they really have no choice.

I'd really not be happy of someone getting in my car lifting of smoke, (although I am aware that's contradictory of my comment saying my car often smells of stale smoke, but fresh smoke is just as bad) I just wish I'd never started smoking when I was younger :(

At the end of the day, smoking is a choice, the same as driving and the same as you have the choice NOT to give someone a lift

Yanbu it properly clings to the car fabric

Krysten that’s not my experience. Ds smokes ( outside ) but obviously comes back in and sits down, the house does not smell of cigarettes, same with the car.

Your car your choice.

I hate the smell of cigarette smoke as a non smoker. I grew up with chain smoking parents which affected my chest a lot.

What I hate more is a smoker who thinks they can cover the rank smell by chewing chewing gum and spraying cheap perfume (usually so! or impulse) gross

I think there's a lot of projecting going on here now. Bitterness towards cigarette smoking partners, parents and contempt for perceived social detritus is skewing people's views.

Not U at all. Smoke is toxic and you can smell it a mile off. It gives me migraines, even walking past a smoker in the street will do it for me.

Oh my god. You lot are so full-on. Someone might have forgotten deodorant next time when they get in your car. Or eaten curry. Or farts. It’s a smell. And it will not linger six months later in your car. But, yes, tell her to get the bus. Why should you give her a lift? Sort of two different points.

Krysten that’s not my experience. Ds smokes ( outside ) but obviously comes back in and sits down, the house does not smell of cigarettes, same with the car.

If you're living with smokers though, even if you don't smoke yourself, you'll be accustomed to the smell. You just won't notice it the same as when you're in a household completely free of smokers.

I used to smoke Krysten so my nose is very attuned to cigarette smell. Obviously when he comes back in from having a cigarette I can smell it but not for very much after. It certainly doesn’t linger in the air or on the furniture. I know you don’t want to believe that but I’m it’s true.