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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To refuse lift to smoker because she smells?

332 replies

florapearl · 23/10/2017 13:38

Obviously not as blunt as that but she lights up just before getting in the car and it stinks. So AIBU to tell her to get the bus if she can't wait?

OP posts:
kali110 · 23/10/2017 19:12

sunandmoonshine what a disgusting comment . Some of us have standards.
Agree Hmm 'oiks' again, think i'll take the smokers, they seem to be polite and compassionate than some people Hmm

PutTheBunnyBackInTheBox · 23/10/2017 19:35

I got half way through this thread and couldn't take the melodrama anymore so apologies if this has already been posted but just out of interest, would anyone give a lift to an obese person? I'm thinking of wear and tear on the car obvs Halo

Ethylred · 23/10/2017 19:38

I've put people out of the car because they stink.

Smitff · 23/10/2017 19:43

Smokers on MN are like climate change deniers. Dinosaurs, of another generation, me-me-me, my freedoms over your life/health/wellbeing/wishes.

50 years from now people will be wondering how it was ever allowed. Although undoubtedly there’ll be something far more pernicious doing the rounds by then...

ethelfleda · 23/10/2017 19:46

Ethylred you are my predecessor!

TDHManchester · 23/10/2017 19:47

YANBU...i cant stand the smell of smoking/smokers. That includes cannabis smokers. I wouldnt even date a female who smoked even if she had the hots for me..

Protectingmydaughterfromfilth · 23/10/2017 19:50

Bottles That’s pathetic!!!!!!!

Just because someone chooses to smoke - when AWAY from you and on their own, means they aren’t allowed in your house? What if the guy coming to fix your boiler is a smoker? Does he have to fill out a ‘Habits’ questionnaire before he’s allowed entry?!?!

Get a grip

DailyMailReadersAreThick · 23/10/2017 19:52

I'm surprised just how strongly people feel about this!

I do wish smoking were banned in public and I would like to round up the people who smoke around hospital entrances and ship them to Australia, but even I wouldn't think twice about letting a smoker sit in my precious car.

And it isn't true that all smokers stink of it (I've never smoked, by the way). Some people I know stink of it. Others, you can't tell. One of my best friends smokes 20 a day and she doesn't smell, her clothes don't smell, her house doesn't smell. I have no idea how she does it... maybe it's something to do with her smoking roll-ups.

Protectingmydaughterfromfilth · 23/10/2017 19:52

Spaghetti You all get changed after being around someone who smokes? OUTSIDE????? I think you’re imagining it because that is FAR FAR FAR too OTT.

ILostItInTheEarlyNineties · 23/10/2017 20:02

I wouldn't agree that smoking is a choice per se. Most smokers are slaves to their addiction and couldn't give up if you paid them. Fully aware they're are despised by most of society and spending a fortune on killing themselves, aging themselves and making themselves smell.

A bit of compassion for a nicotine addicts wouldn't go amiss, instead of name calling.

RubMyRhubarb · 23/10/2017 20:07

You all get changed after being around someone who smokes? OUTSIDE?????

They totally claim to do! They can smell the pungent whaft from a smoker DECADES after one has been in their car you know!

Some of the posters here could easily replace sniffer dogs, detecting illicit substances from counties away.

I once met a lady from Scotland who couldn't sell her house because 8 houses down in her street the owner before the previous owners friend came over and had a cigar on new years eve back in the 50s.
Totally true, that is. Bankrupt she went. They knocked the place down in the end, the stench from that one cigar just couldn't be removed no matter how hard they tried.

User843022 · 23/10/2017 20:12

'I got half way through this thread and couldn't take the melodrama anymore so apologies if this has already been posted but just out of interest, would anyone give a lift to an obese person? I'm thinking of wear and tear on the car obvs '

Yes it makes you wonder doesn't it.

WonderLime · 23/10/2017 20:16

I’m annoyed at the smokers telling non-smokers that their smell doesn’t linger - because it does. I will agree that it depends on the individual though.

My DM and her partner spoke. They smoke in their house and car too. They do not smoke in my car or house.

However, the smell does linger. Last time they were round I could smell it on my sofa for 2 days.

And it smells awful! I’m an ex smoker and grew up in a smoking household, so I remember what it was like before hand thinking it really wasn’t that bad as I was used to it. But when you are away from it for long enough, it just smells rank.

WonderLime · 23/10/2017 20:18

Smoke*

prettybird · 23/10/2017 20:19

I wasn't aware that overweight or obese people left a lingering "fatness" in the car after they'd left it HmmConfused

Fortunately, I have no friends who smoke (a very few who used to years ago). FIL was the only person in my "close" circle who smoked - and he never did in our presence.

RubMyRhubarb · 23/10/2017 20:22

They do not smoke in my car or house.

Perfectly reasonable, then?

Last time they were round I could smell it on my sofa for 2 days

Bullshit. Unless they never wash their clothes? How long were they sat on your sofa for? You could smell this for TWO DAYS? When they weren't smoking IN your house? Nope. I don't believe it.

ProfessorCat · 23/10/2017 20:23

Of course it's a choice. And I wouldn't have a smoke smelling workman in my house, no.

PandorasXbox · 23/10/2017 20:24

Christ this is the vaguest thread alive.

Who is the mystery fag ash Lil and how often do you you give her a lift?

WonderLime · 23/10/2017 20:28

RubMyRhubarb you don’t have to believe me, but it is true. Smoke has this tendency to cling to fabric in a way that very few smells do. It does linger. And I’m clearly not the only person who has said that on this thread, but yeah, we are all lying. Hmm

As I did mention it depends on the individual. My DM and partner live in a smokey bubble so they do stink of it. I have a friend who doesn’t smoke inside and she doesn’t leave a lingering smell.

However I do not appreciate being told I’m lying because you would rather be ignorant of the smell of smokers.

RubMyRhubarb · 23/10/2017 20:28

Pandora Yes, I agree, but it's turned into something quite interesting. Some outlandish claims have been made (not by OP) and that's largely why it's still going :)

RubMyRhubarb · 23/10/2017 20:32

WonderLime

IF people are ACTUALLY SMOKING you might have a point, you are claiming that people who smoke (but aren't actually smoking in your property) leave a stench lingering for TWO DAYS - that's the bit I don't believe so yes I'm calling bullshit on your claim.

If you want to appeal to other posters, fine, I'll appeal to the posters who have agreed that such claims are bollocks. It's a long ish thread by now, but those posts are there should you wish to read them.

ethelfleda · 23/10/2017 20:33

Some of the posters here could easily replace sniffer dogs, detecting illicit substances from counties away

I once met a lady from Scotland who couldn't sell her house because 8 houses down in her street the owner before the previous owners friend came over and had a cigar on new years eve back in the 50s

Haha!

Lokisglowstickofdestiny · 23/10/2017 20:37

Smoke does linger. I think we are more sensitive now as it is not such a common smell. I work with someone who smokes, not heavily but when she comes back from a smoking break the smell is very noticeable even though she sits some way from me, it is vile. I really don't think smokers realise how much others notice the smell. I'd not have someone who had recently smoked in my car if I could help it - don't have so much choice with say tradesmen - had a boiler repairman around a few months ago. He smelt of smoke and despite working in our airing cupboard for no more than an hour it smelt of smoke for a good couple of days.

prettybird · 23/10/2017 20:37

You're welcome to call it bullshit. You're effectively calling all of us who have described such incidences liars at worst, or imagining it at best. I'd suggest that you are blinkered and unaware.

WonderLime · 23/10/2017 20:43

RubMyRhubarb

Yes, let’s keep being ignorant and claiming that my actual real life experience is bullshit.

From Wikipedia - nicotine and other components of the smoke tend to coat a space's surfaces including skin, hair and clothing and continue to emit toxins.

So yes, the smell transfers from a person to another surface, even when they are not actively smoking.