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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to be pissed off with DD1

264 replies

SunshineLollipopsRainbows25 · 19/10/2017 20:33

I'm trying extra hard with dd1 as she has been the only child in the family for 6y I've got a dd2 now 5m! I've been really happy and chirpy with her and making loads of effort to keep her involved and make sure she feels like I'm giving her the same amount of attention as the baby. it's half term.. I said we are going somewhere nice tomorrow(the zoo).. we've just been doing her homework together, I said if she puts her home work away and gets into bed I'll tell her where we're going.. she picked up her bag, looked at me dead in the eyes and said "but I didn't get my homework out" with a smug as fuck look on her face thinking I should put it away for her as I got it out of the bag. I felt rage build up and said "are you being serious?" a panicked look came across her face and I said "don't you DARE be rude to me" and walked away she's put herself to bed. I haven't gone back into the room I'm so angry! should I go back in or just leave her to fester and think about her rudeness?

OP posts:
GreatStar · 19/10/2017 23:24

Nicknacky

open I don't accept rudeness from my children, far from it. But I don't make them feel the way the op's kid did. I discipline appropriately

You think you discipline appropriately. Someone else may disagree completely

Nicknacky · 19/10/2017 23:25

Or maybe instead of learning how to word your posts differently you could acknowledge your methods were wrong and learn from that?

Nicknacky · 19/10/2017 23:25

Err ok greatstar whatever.

I have a very polite 10 year old and I'm doing ok so far.

Original poster
SunshineLollipopsRainbows25 · 19/10/2017 23:28

I have a very polite 6 year old bar times she tries to test the waters I'm sure your 10 year old has never been rude

OP posts:
GreatStar · 19/10/2017 23:29

G'night all , glad all's well with the little girl and mum that's the only thing that matters c

Nicknacky · 19/10/2017 23:30

Struggling to think of a time actually. My three year old, god yes! Never struggled to control my rage though or had them have a panicked look on their faces.......

Imaginosity · 19/10/2017 23:30

No human is perfect. You don't need to jump on the slightest show of cheekiness especially when your DD is normally well behaved. You could have laughed along and cracked a joke back. Lighten up!!!

OpenThePickles · 19/10/2017 23:31

Or maybe instead of learning how to word your posts differently you could acknowledge your methods were wrong and learn from that?

Wrong in your opinion just. Plenty of people here who agree OP handled the situation well. As I said, you are not superior just because you may do things differently.

Nicknacky · 19/10/2017 23:32

Handled it well?! Lol who in all honesty thinks she handled it well?

Fucking hell.

Original poster
SunshineLollipopsRainbows25 · 19/10/2017 23:34

I haven't struggled to control my rage.. I told her not to be rude.. yes I ranted on here but she has no idea over ranted.. it's not affected her in the slightest. there has been no struggle.

OP posts:
littlemissglittersparkles · 19/10/2017 23:34

FUCKING HELL MN IS FULL
OF FUCKING PERFECT PARENTS ISNT IT!
except it's not and you're all just bigging yourselves up to strangers on an Internet forum

Original poster
SunshineLollipopsRainbows25 · 19/10/2017 23:35

don't forget to March in the annual PerfectParentParade this year nicknacky

OP posts:
NoCryLilSoftSoft · 19/10/2017 23:36

I'm sure your 10 year old has never been rude

Well, you were never rude so it is possible...

Nicknacky · 19/10/2017 23:36

I don't need to. My kids don't need to take their self to bed with panic in their eyes.

OpenThePickles · 19/10/2017 23:38

Did you miss the update where OP went in and spoke to her DD and sorted it all out?Did you miss all the posts telling lots of posters they are drama queens? This was a child being told not to be rude, nothing else. You can try your best to make it into something more all you like.

TalkinBoutWhat · 19/10/2017 23:38

lurkingnotlurking

Gives me the rage is nothing like going into a rage at all.

All my ranting and raving is done either on MN or to a friend. For their misdemeanors my DC get a stern telling off, perhaps some time out, or an IPad ban (which is apparently the greatest tragedy in the world right now and works a treat!).

Ceto · 19/10/2017 23:39

I love how people are saying how I got so angry and that I have anger issues... 😂 I didn't even shout at her I only raised my voice on the word dare. she's totally fine people.

You can't have it both ways, OP. Your original post said "I felt rage build up and said "are you being serious?" a panicked look came across her face and I said "don't you DARE be rude to me" and walked away she's put herself to bed. I haven't gone back into the room I'm so angry". That just isn't the light-hearted bit of discipline you're trying to portray it as now.

Nicknacky · 19/10/2017 23:39

That she missed from her op conveniently....

isitme88 · 19/10/2017 23:42

Op just pull the thread and move on from it now. Under 1s and the school run is hard enough. So I’ll put your rant down to irrationality and tiredness. We’ve all been there. I would stop engaging with comments now and jut be aware that your daughter is 7 weeks into a new school year and dealing with a new sibling. Benefit of the doubt I think is needed here. Show stability and consistency. And eat some chocolate too. It’s almost half term!

Original poster
SunshineLollipopsRainbows25 · 19/10/2017 23:43

it was all dramatisation in the OP it's seriously not that bad my dad would have chased me up the stairs and given me a slap not told me to not be rude

OP posts:
Nicknacky · 19/10/2017 23:43

You can't just pull a thread because you don't like the replies.

Nicknacky · 19/10/2017 23:44

Why dramatise it then? And just because you don't hit her doesn't make your approach right.

NoCryLilSoftSoft · 19/10/2017 23:45

How do you know what your dad would have done? you were never rude.

JassyRadlett · 19/10/2017 23:47

Pointless thread. OP didn’t get the back patting and praise for her excellent parenting that she was hoping for, so she’s walked it back (particular the weird ‘feeling the rage build’ over something so minor), she looks like a bit of a drama queen/attention seeker as a result and folk are just feeding it now.

OpenThePickles · 19/10/2017 23:48

Nicknacky

For the third time...In your opinion it doesn't make it right. YOU ARE NOT SUPERIOR because you parent differently. Ugh, this is so frustrating.