WIBU me or DH?

[CurlyWurlyHairCoveredChocolate]

I won some money on a raffle, not a lot about £500.

I think we should use it to clear off two small debts we have; one's a credit card which has £200 left to pay on it and the other is an overdraft of about £180. I want to put the remaining towards DD (who's 2) Christmas presents, and get her something I know she really wants - it won't cost the whole £120 left but a good chunk of it. The rest will cover our Christmas Day food costs.

My DHs PS4 broke about 6 months ago - it's unrepairable so we sold it for spares and repairs. He's been going to my DMs to use my DBros or going to his friends to play theirs. He's been going a couple of times a week (I don't actually mind as I go swimming 3 times a week after work so this is his "leisure time"). He was very excited when I won the money, "I can finally replace the PS4" he says quite happily.

Personally, I know it's a pain but my DBro is out at work 4 nights a week and is happy for my DH to use his PS4 in that time, so I prefer the system we have, and I think the debts are a higher priority than his PS4. If he goes to his friends, they spend time together have a laugh and he says he enjoys going so again I don't mind.

I'm happy to be told IABU, but should we be boring and sensible or do I let my DH blow it all on an expensive console that neither me nor DD will benefit from?

You can buy a PS4 for £150 with games secondhand on Gumtree at the moment.

In the last few months, what has he done to save up for a new console?

Pay off the debt and save for Xmas. He can swing.

I can't get over how often he 'needs' to go out to play.

How old is he?

Please follow your plan and tell him to grow up

How old is your husband?!

Poor diddums

PS4 = young man's golf!

Eeeee I love my Xbox but that wouldn’t be my first thought if there were debts to be paid.

He needs to sell the consoles he has and start saving for this ps4. Don’t you dare cave.

He's usually pretty good with DD but generally on a game at the same time, although he will pause it to change her nappy or get her something to eat.

scootin I had my heart set on buying her a decent toy kitchen with some accessories for about £90. I know she wants one as she will point them out to me when we go passed one in a shop. She's had a touch year herself - she has a few extra needs and had an appointment at least every other day in August and same again in November. I wasn't planning to buy it but I won the money, seeing DD happy is a big enough treat for me.

I could not be married to a man who plays computer games. They are for children.

He's 24 and yes my DM does find it odd he goes to play games in my DBros room 3 days a week but my DBro is also 24, pays rent, buys all his own food possibly even does his own washing and ironing and works 4 nights a week, bought the PS4 himself so my DM says what he does with his room/PS4 is his business.

I know things have changed since 'my day' but bills come first, they must. You're paying interest on your CC when you can clear them and have extra cash each month. I think DH needs to give his head a shake.

*tough year that should of been

I could not be married to a man who plays computer games. They are for children.

No they are not.

Adult men and women make up the biggest demographic in gaming.

No!! Spend it on what you want!!! Much better idea!

You won it!! I won £500 last year. My partner never expected anything from me but I treated him to an Xbox. But he’s so selfless that I didn’t mind one bit.

although he will pause it to change her nappy or get her something to eat.

That's good of him.

Clearing your debts benefits the whole family
Buying a PlayStation only benefits him

You are right, he is wrong

Agree with others, that he is being unreasonable expecting the money for a new PlayStation. But I think you are mad wanting to spend £90 on a toy kitchen for your daughter.

However, your winnings, your choice!

I could not be married to a man who plays computer games. They are for children

Heh I won’t even expose my kids to me playing the games I play never mind let him play them. Talking right out of the arse there someone is

You think him briefly pausing his game to change your child's nappy and feed her makes him a good father?

When I asked if your Mum finds it odd I didn't mean from the point of view of it being your brother's room but the fact that he leaves his partner and child most evenings to do it.

Well, for a start he could sell his PS2 and PS3 and use that money towards his new toy. As for your win, I think your plan is perfect. Hope DD loves her new kitchen!

Pay off the debts and do with the rest as you outlined.
Could your partner apply for a interest free credit card and buy his own games console, then just pay it off in chucks?

I could not be married to a man who'd rather spend money on a console than on clearing out debts.

Let him sell his PS3 and PS2, even get odd jobs or a part-time to pay for the new PS4 instead of spending time going to play on your brother's.

I am with a man who plays on a ps4 but his priority are the children, dogs, housework, me, work over anything ps4 related. Before I used to be married to someone who put the ps4 as priority. Never again.

Tbh op your dh sounds a little childish and selfish. Merely pausing a game to nappy change and feed a child is not enough.

"He's usually pretty good with DD but generally on a game at the same time, although he will pause it to change her nappy or get her something to eat." How gracious of him that he will stop playing long enough to feed and change your daughter! That doesn't sound like stellar parenting to me. YANBU and you need to view him through a filter of higher expectations. It sounds like the playstation comes first over you and your DD.

He does go to work as well! The credit card is actually his as I have poor credit thanks to an ex partner - we used it to buy a new washing machine. The overdraft is also DHs as when we got married and opened a joint account her "forgot" to move all the bills over to our joint account and just let the bills go out of his account while both sets of wages went into the joint account.

Curley honestly pay the debt off. You are right.