WIBU me or DH?

[CurlyWurlyHairCoveredChocolate]

I won some money on a raffle, not a lot about £500.

I think we should use it to clear off two small debts we have; one's a credit card which has £200 left to pay on it and the other is an overdraft of about £180. I want to put the remaining towards DD (who's 2) Christmas presents, and get her something I know she really wants - it won't cost the whole £120 left but a good chunk of it. The rest will cover our Christmas Day food costs.

My DHs PS4 broke about 6 months ago - it's unrepairable so we sold it for spares and repairs. He's been going to my DMs to use my DBros or going to his friends to play theirs. He's been going a couple of times a week (I don't actually mind as I go swimming 3 times a week after work so this is his "leisure time"). He was very excited when I won the money, "I can finally replace the PS4" he says quite happily.

Personally, I know it's a pain but my DBro is out at work 4 nights a week and is happy for my DH to use his PS4 in that time, so I prefer the system we have, and I think the debts are a higher priority than his PS4. If he goes to his friends, they spend time together have a laugh and he says he enjoys going so again I don't mind.

I'm happy to be told IABU, but should we be boring and sensible or do I let my DH blow it all on an expensive console that neither me nor DD will benefit from?

No the debts take precedence and the rest of the plan is sensible as well. I've done some extra shifts at work - it's a good chunk of money and would buy me an iPad Pro (which I desperately want). but it'll also clear my cc debt so that's what I'm doing. Sigh. I get it sucks being an adult but sometimes that's just what you have to do.

He can get a used PS3 console from Game for about 70 quid. Why does he need a brand new PS4?

I'd struggle to see how anyone would think he was BU.

Gracious me. Of course you are right. Time for DH to take up a more mature hobby perhaps?

I vote for the boring but sensible debt clearance and Christmas shopping.

Stitch He has a PS3 and a PS2 but his friends/my DBro who he plays online with have PS4s so he can't play with them.

Nope, couldn't get past the idea of a grown man needing to go round to a friend's so often to play A BLOODY GAME.

LTB

Our games console was stolen.

If I had a £500 windfall it wouldn’t go on a replacement, as I’m a sensible adult with priorities.

Aw he can't play with his ickle fwends? How sad.

That’s quite selfish expecting to spend your winnings on something only he benefits from.
This

(Paying off debts should always come first, in my book.)

I won some money

He didn't win the money, you did - so you get to decide what to do with it.

Tbh any grown man who spends his time playing games on a console does not get to decide how real adults spend money. YANBU. Definitely.

Your mum must have the patience of a saint.

You are most definitely doing the right thing.
Could your DH sell his other play stations, and save up for a PS4 ?

Doesn't your Mum find it odd that your DP leaves his partner and child several evenings a week to play computer games in your brother's bedroom?

You won money. You plan to put your winnings into paying off family debt and family Xmas. He wants to spend it on a toy for himself?

I would have said you were right from your first post, but if the bank are chasing you to increase payments just get the debts paid off.

Tell the child to save up for his toys like any other child.

Why doesn’t he sell his other two consoles then? I would clear debts as a priority. I notice you didn’t mention anything for yourself. Also your daughter is 2 - would this expensive item really be worth it or could you divvy the money three ways so you all benefit?

He can save the £20 pm that you are paying for your overdraft & buy a 2nd hand one & call it his Xmas present.
Hate these game addicts with a vengeance, does he help with DC or is he constantly on the fucking console? (when it works)

Grown men gaming make me shudder.
However, he’s so out of order to think the money YOU won should be spent on a console.
Your plan is very sensible.

YANBU at all. Debts over toys, whomever they're for, every time!

YANBU!

Your husband is being ridiculous and selfish.

Honestly, even if he'd been the one to win the money (or your plans on spending the money were reversed), I'd still say the person who wanted to blow the lot on a toy that only person would get use of, was being ridiculous.

debts before toys im afraid!

How much do you plan to spend on his present at xmas? Could you put some of this money towards a new PS4, and organise collectively for family to give small contributions towards the rest of the cost as his xmas gift?

You should def pay off the CC bills regardless of what you do with the remainder.

He has a PS3 and a PS2

he what? And you're getting calls from bank because of overdraft - he should have sold the consoles when he upgraded.

YANBU. Does he really not recognise how selfish it is to expect your winnings to go to his games, when your plan doesn't even involve spending any money on you, just debts and your children? I would be so frustrated at feeling like the only adult in the house.