To complain about behaviour of gynaecologist

[TenForward82]

I know I'm not BU, but I guess I just want to talk this out.

High-profile gynae at private hospital in 2014. Referred to him for chronic pain during sex. Consultation was all fine, nurse present at examination. Without saying anything he pushed his fingers into my vagina, watching my face. When I winced he smirked in a very self-satisfied way. I've never had a Dr look for a pain response ANYWHERE without telling me "let me know if it hurts". And the look on his face - it's like he enjoyed hurting me.

It's bothered me ever since. In a way I don't want him to know that he got to me, and I certainly don't want a pointless apology from him. But I worry that he may be doing worse to other patients.

I did a web search of his name and can't find any complaints - just a few "patient reviews" that sound so OTT as to be fake. I'd feel better I think if I knew others had an issue. If it's the only complaint, it would be a waste of time and he'd get the satisfaction of knowing he bothered me.

Vipers?

I have had no shortage of gynae issues sadly but without a doubt the most 'business is business' branch of medicine I have come across is gynaecology women in particular. I remember one reading through my notes saying "you must get pregnant every time you take your knickers off" ..... I have 3 dc

I'm absolutely sickened and repulsed by the amount of women minimising and even mocking the OP, when she is trying to ask for support. What the fuck do you get out of coming on here and telling the OP she can't tell the difference between a reassuring smile and a smirk? Or even asking what she expected! Jesus Christ.

The amount of abuse men commit against women is huge, yet it seems some women will still go to the ends of the earth to defend them and put down women who speak up.

I believe you OP, and I wouldn't see a male genacologist either, experience has shown me that I can't trust men when I'm vulnerable. Not saying all men are creeps, but many are.

I agree Angels

no doubt the op will get an explanation why

More than 30 years ago I went to my female GP because I believed I had something wrong. I was a virgin and I believed my va va was too small or unformed.I couldn't insert anything in there - not even a normal sized pencil (which I'd tried out of desperation).
I was given no warning, she just shoved a finger in, I jumped a bit and she said "there's nothing wrong with you."
I was actually suffering from vaginismus and if she'd warned me beforehand what she was going to do, I would have tensed up, she wouldn't have got a finger in and I'd have been convinced that I wasn't "like other girls".
However she did it when I was totally relaxed and not expecting anything.I actually laughed with relief when she spoke to me.
There is always the chance that OP's doctor was doing exactly the same as mine.

There was a clear difference with your experience though - after the initial shock mrsh your GP explained/talked to you offering reassurance. I very much doubt she smirked whilst causing you pain.

Misery, I wouldn't say she was reassuring. She was dismissive, as if it was no big thing but she certainly didn't smirk.

He had already said what he thought the diagnosis was, and it wasn't vaginismus. Also, and I think this bears repeating ... he smirked.

I believe you OP. 38 years ago when I wa expecting my first, I was given an internal by a Resident Gyni which left me feeling very uncomfortable - like he enjoyed it too much. I didnt say anything at the time, but talking to a friend who saw the same guy, she said the same thing.

I later mentioned it to a friendly midwife (when I wa in labout), and she sighed and said 'yes, we call him Fingersxxxxx'. So it was well-nown amongst the staff that he was rather too enthusiastic about his job!

I've probably phased the reassurance part wrongly mrsh as the GP didn't offer it in a comforting sense - your reassurance came in the form of the diagnosis and knowing that what you first thought wasn't the case.

Tenforward if you are absolutely sure this guy abused you, then you need to put in a formal complaint.
You were there, you know what happened.
For your peace of mind you need to take this further.

@TenForward82
you able to hint who this gynae was?
I too have had a bad experience. curious.
xx