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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think it's inappropriate to sell these in a shop aimed at pre-teens?

212 replies

TheActualMarilynManson · 10/10/2017 20:22

NC as I've told people I'm posting this but I'm a long time regular, 'cancel the cheque', yoni, korean lady, etc.

So, I'm in Claire's Accessories today and see these..... (hopefully the photo will upload correctly.)

For starters, anyone who knows what these items are intended to be used for will not buy one from Claire's Accessories.
Secondly, I don't know a person over 13 who buys anything from this shop, they are unlikely to understand, so why sell it?
Third, children will buy this stuff, have their photo taken, then in a few years will come to realise what their parents allowed them to wear in the name of 'being trendy'.

That's just the obvious points. I also have a massive issue with BDSM being made 'mainstream' because of the negativity which always comes with it in the media.

'50 Shades' did a HUGE amount of damage to the BDSM scene. Their relationship was not D/S, it was emotional abuse, with some sex thrown in.
True D/S relationships are built on trust, respect, years of commitment, and learning.

As someone heavily involved in the BDSM scene, I find it hugely offensive that a way of life, and a whole community of likeminded people, can be essentially mocked by what is deemed 'fashion'.

So, AIBU to think this is inappropriate 'jewellery' for a childrens accessory shop?

To think it's inappropriate to sell these in a shop aimed at pre-teens?
OP posts:
Thread gallery
14
HarrietSchulenberg · 10/10/2017 20:24

TBH, I would just see those as necklaces and wouldn't be bothered but I see where you're coming from.

CurlyhairedAssassin · 10/10/2017 20:26

Chokers seem to be in at the moment. Can’t see too much of a probkem

Tessliketrees · 10/10/2017 20:26

It's not a community or a way or life it's a fetish.

I honestly didn't realise they were supposed to be dog collars until you started ranting about BDSM. They are just goth chokers to me. Dog collars were part of the goth/punk scene well before 50 shades.

Also I buy stuff from Clares and I am 35.

fantasmasgoria1 · 10/10/2017 20:27

Lol Just chokers tbh! Lots of goth and alternative folks wear this type of choker! I am alternative myself and have a couple and I don’t indulge in bdsm!

Pengggwn · 10/10/2017 20:27

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Gimmeareason · 10/10/2017 20:28

Its just because the 90s style is back

RJnomore1 · 10/10/2017 20:28

Used to wear ACTUAL DOG COLLARS from the pet shop in the 90s. Cannot see a problem with these.

SerendipityFelix · 10/10/2017 20:29

I wouldn’t think they were anything to do with BDSM, just chokers. Just jewellery, not offensive or inappropriate.

DianaPrincessOfThemyscira · 10/10/2017 20:29

They're just chokers. They were in back in the 90s when I was in my early teens and they're in again. It's not a ball gag.

Are you similarly upset by high heels and fishnet tights? Or thong underwear?

2014newme · 10/10/2017 20:29

😂😂😂😂 at claire's accessories 'mocking' the bdsm scene by selling chokers.
Who else remembers wear them in the 90s?

RunningOutOfCharge · 10/10/2017 20:30

You are looking for issues where there are none......possibly as an excuse to ‘educate’ us all on your fetish!
Hmm

I only ever see middle aged women in our Claire’s

RunningOutOfCharge · 10/10/2017 20:30

Yay! I Loved the 90’s!!!

JumpingJellybeanz · 10/10/2017 20:30

Is Claire's really a childrens' shop or is that just a bit of hyperbole to get the outrage juices flowing?

2014newme · 10/10/2017 20:31

Spice Girls were into their chokers weren't they

ShirleyPhallus · 10/10/2017 20:31

If you think that's bad, haven't you seen their gimp masks masquerading as winter hats?

treeofhearts · 10/10/2017 20:32

They're just chokers. They were very in when I was a child.

RunningOutOfCharge · 10/10/2017 20:33

Lol this is funny

Op wanted outrage!!! She has ‘told’ people she is posting this ya’know

ImCatbug · 10/10/2017 20:33

I own the top choker in the photo. That exact one, bought from Claire’s. I’m 24 years old and buy a lot of things from there. So do a lot of friends I know.
I also have a couple of real, actual BDSM collars (made of thick leather with actual buckles at the back instead of flimsy chains). The difference between them is very, very obvious.
I like that I can buy cheap, cute accessories from places like Claire’s. I work opposite one of the shops and I never see pre-teens buying things like this, usually just the cutesy colourful chokers. I don’t really see an issue.

KungFuPandaWorksOut16 · 10/10/2017 20:34

So you think Claire's are secretly selling BDSM accessories under the guise of chokers?

Or maybe they are just actually chokers.
If I wanted BDSM accessories trust me Claire's wouldn't be on my list of shops too check.

Pretenditsaplan · 10/10/2017 20:36

I think your issue is with collaring. These are not collars in that sense just fun accessories that come in and out of fashion. True collering usually entails engagement level collars so not cheapo ones from claires

SomewhatIdiosyncratic · 10/10/2017 20:36

I wore chokers in my teens during the 90s. I haven't even read 50 Shades of Grey. Grin

I also wore a lot of cropped tops and flashed my abdomen off. I'm glad it got a good public airing before pregnancy and childbirth trashed it Grin

You're totes unreasonables!

EddChinasVagina · 10/10/2017 20:37
Hmm
Migraleve · 10/10/2017 20:37

For starters, anyone who knows what these items are intended to be used for will not buy one from Claire's Accessories

These items are intended to chokers Confused

Migraleve · 10/10/2017 20:37
  • to be
Petalbird · 10/10/2017 20:38

They are chockers at a guess though I can't see the back not collars so what's the issue?