DH is in debt

[gameofthrones22]

Sorry for the slightly long ramble but here goes... any advice really appreciated.

I've been married to DH for nearly 2 years and 5 months in to our marriage I found out he had credit card debts amounting to nearly 15K. I was shocked, upset, betrayed but felt like it was something we could get through. Now I've come to the thinking that it's not something I can get through. I feel like its a huge amount and having never had money worries the amount terrifies me. All my spare money goes on house stuff that needs doing as DH literally doesn't haven't a penny to his name after his monthly repayments come out.

DH earns 21K so I've calculated by making minimum payments it will take approx 4 years maybe more to pay this off. I earn 29K and will try to do my best to help DH but I've become resentful at having to miss out on stuff or decline invites or not afford a new car or holiday etc as I am saving to help DH out.

Does anyone have any advice on what to do? I'm really really torn. Should this be something we should be able to get through together? Just makes me sad kids etc will be delayed as we will have no disposable income any time soon.

Cold facts are. He owes 14k. He’s paying 300 (or whatever) per month. You’ve got 1700 free after commitments. You could be paying 2k of the debt off each month, clearing the total amount in 7 months if on 0%interest cards. Personally I’d just condense the payments so that the debt is clear by August

Sorry misread. I recon if you put £800 away each month the debt will be cleared in just over a year

The other idea Is to remortgage adding the debt in.

Haffdonga
Her dh would have to pay tax on the income. The mortgage interest element is being phased in to be classed as income and he will get relief on this as the rules have changed. This quite possibly would not make a lot of sense these days.

Although it depends on your earnings. If like my son when he let his house you just pay 20% tax not 40% then you can still set the mortgage against the rent (and you in any event you can deduct your other costs of course - 9% agents fee etc etc). Both my son and daughter have lived at home and rented out their places to help with finances at times (not currently but before).

My husband is in 14k of debt. We've been married a year, together for 6 and although I'm not happy about his debt, he has always luckily been open about most of it. Its not something he is proud of and has stupidly buried his head for a long time (before I knew the full extent) However, he has put himself on a DMP. He pays a good amount a month and I have said if he is still committed to it by January and keeping up his plan, I will match his payments and double his re-payments. His credit effects my credit and in a few years time we will want to start looking at houses to buy. I found the more I got myself pissed off about the situation the more I resented him. In 24 months WE will be debt free, I say this because his debt is my debt. I married him and I love him so if I can do anything to help I will. He knows not to take my kindness for weakness though and knows he's an ass to begin with. The second he slacks with his repayments ill drop out all together and he can tackle his debt alone.

Good luck x

Sounds like the debt is joint costs. It’s just money at the end of the day.

Part of being married is tackling problems together.

zombie thread

I found out my husband to be had debts of £20k three months before we got married. If we hadn't paid out so much for the wedding already I would have walked away. Ten years on and we still have separate bank accounts and I make sure I protect myself financially. I feel your pain I really do, I've been there

I've read all of the posts and I still don't understand why £280 a month on debt repayments is causing you such financial hardship - especially as it's coming from his account, not yours.

He must get I'm guessing around £1500 a month after tax and pension, and spends £280 on debt repayments and then puts at least £600 into the joint account, meaning there's still another £600 odd less his car repayment?

I just think the figures are completely fudged on this one. I can't for the life of me work out how a couple who earn £50k annually between them can't comfortably afford £280 a month in debt repayments and still live a nice life? Am I being stupid here?

We have a similar income to you OP, just the two of us, mortgage a similar amount, 2 cars, if we really want to we can save £1000 per month by not eating out, cutting back on the food bill but can still afford a couple of bottles of wine a week a to eat reasonably well. As pp have said, 4 years is a short time in a hopefully long marriage, you need to think of yourselves as a team now, discuss everything and work together to resolve problems, there will be more hurdles in the future and working together now will build a strong foundation for life ahead.