What would you do? Woman makes drinks

[Memyselfandiiiiii]

I don't think I'm being unreasonable but this fills me with rage everyone and I don't know what to do about it.

In work meetings I'm often the only woman, but am equally well qualified as the male participants, albeit younger. So why is it that every single time the CEO says ' X will make the drinks, just tell her what you'd like '. Maybe I'm too easy to wind up but I feel absolutely raging every time. What would you do/say?

awifeyforlifey

voluntold

I like that.

This happens at my workplace - I'm senior to a lot of the men, but if I'm the only woman around when a client comes in my boss will ask me to make the drinks. It makes me RAGE inside. I've brought it up before but nothing changes.

Last week I had a day when I told everyone that I was pissed off at being the tea girl and not making any drinks for everyone.

'That's it! I'm not the tea girl - and if anyone ever has the cheer to ask me to make the tea in front of a client I WILL DO SOMETHING UNSPEAKABLE TO IT - hey Phil, I'm thirsty, where's my tea?' Bless 'em they kept me topped up all day.

I don't mind offering but for goodness sake, don't make it so bloody obvious!

Oh dear that is pretty clearcut mumofone234

baby did someone tell the judge to do the tea and coffee at every meeting?

That's the thing here, that stands out to me. When there are lots of high level people in a room, it doesn't normally fall to one of them to do it every single time, even if one can be identified as less senior than the others, unless they volunteer for some reason.

Generally, if the meeting is one in which drinks would be offered, in my organisation, that either means someone external has come in (expensive - I am public sector) or there is someone, or several someones, super senior in the meeting.

In both, it would be appropriate for the person whose absence will matter least to get the drinks, so time is best spent. Often this will mean the minute taker - usually the most junior person - will not be tea maker as their absence would be problematic for the meetings effectiveness.

I've never seen it be anything other than pragmatic. Maybe just lucky. But similarly, I don't bat an eyelid about being pragmatic if I'm the one whose absence will be least missed, even if I am the only woman in the room.

Similar happens in my organisation, but with moving dirty plates and cups to the trolley for the admin to take to the dishwasher. Men all walk out after the meeting leaving the women to clear the table. I started calling people back to help out and word seemed to go round.

Please don't refuse to make the drinks, or say it's someone else's turn. If i was a client visiting a supplier or service provider, and I saw their CEO asking a member of staff to make drinks, and that member of staff refused or said "it's someone else's turn", I would not be impressed at all. The client doesn't know that you always have to make the drinks; they'll just think you're stroppy and unprofessional. If it's an internal meeting then that's slightly different. Either way, if it bothers you that much just say something ahead of the meeting.

This will totally out me, but I once told someone that my vagina doesn't make tea...

Isn't time we call this what it is ? Keeping women in the kitchen being talked over and marginalised.

Is it so unreasonable for us to say "I'm sure boys can make tea too" with a smile?

If, of course, you all have same JD ...