Apparently I'm the laughing stock of the school

[MavisFrench]

Last year I threw a Halloween party for DD (10 at the time). I did spooky snacks and drinks, had pumpkins to carve and games. It was fancy dress themed and DH and I dressed up too. I was a witch (naturally) and DH was a vampire. DH can be rather theatrical so he had a little smoke machine set up near the front door so that when people arrived he could answer it clouded in smoke and play out his vampire role. He stayed in character throughout the night and the kids seemed to have a good time.

This year I suggested doing the same thing. DD was mortified and said no chance as she was bullied for weeks after the first one!!! I asked why and she said it was DH's "vampire thing" which everyone (including parents!) laughed about and took the piss out of for weeks. So yesterday I asked one of the parents I'm friendly with what the problem was with the first party. She looked uncomfortable and said a few of the parents were laughing about us being "try hards" and one of the dads (chavvy type) said DH was obviously a "peado"!!!

I'm gutted because I put a lot of effort and money into that and had no idea the feedback was so bad, not to mention the piss taking and bullying.

AIBU to take it to the head a year later?

Don't bother with school assuming it's all calmed down

Why not offer to do a Halloween party at school instead and raise some money

Kids pay £3 in with disco and treats

Can I come to your next Halloween party? Sounds fab.

Circulate a rumour that you've won the lottery and this year the best costume wins a prize. See how many laugh then.

On a serious note it sounds like you did a nice thing and included some ungrateful people who didn't deserve it.

I wouldn't go to the head so as not to make things hard for your dd.

Bastards.

I think that is so horrible Boody hell where do your kids go to school?

Sounds great. I love a Halloween party. We are doing our 3rd one and our kids are 10. Just ordered a load bloody dismemberment body parts from Aliexpress. We don't dress up though.

I would call our the Dad who called you DY a paedo. Let him cringe foe a few moment and then blank him forever.

Horrible lot. You ate being ridiculious takibg it to head a year later. Just leave it.

Sounds like a great party! My kids Iwould have loved to go. Ignore the miserable bastards. Don't take it to the head, just never invite any of them to any of your parties again (especially not the lovely guy with the paedo comment ). Friends don't bully.

That sounds pretty unpleasant.

Probably too far past to take it to the school now. I'd be most disturbed that my 10 yo hadn't mentioned it at the time though.

Good grief no - don't raise it again now!! You did a lovely thing, people bitched about it because, well, people are nasty cunts, frankly.

Nasty bunch of twats.

Leave it though, seriously. Would be totally unfair on DD to bring it up again. I can totally understand why you want to because of the bullying but please, please don't

I think your party sounds ACE - every year I am disappointed by the lack of effort put into Halloween here in the UK. In Ireland it has always been massive, certainly going back to the 1980s when I was a little witch/ghost/mummy.

However don't go to the head, that would make you look nuts. Just hold your head high and mentally label the other parents as joyless puritans who would be all the better for surrendering to the spookiness.

At the age of, what 11 now? I imagine your daughter doesn't want to do it because it's a bit childish. Most secondary school kids would be a bit mortified if their parents did that I imagine.
Maybe that's what happened last year. Maybe some of the kids came not realising it was going to be a full on performance thing. Sorry. But no, you mustn't go to the school unless you have the full story from your daughter.

I wouldn't bring it up a year later tbh. I bet your DD didn't want you to take it to the school last year, which is why she probably stayed quiet about it. I never find out about things until ages after, especially if my DC think I may 'embarrass' them when saying something.

However, that sounds like a fab party and they all sound like a bunch of ungrateful people. As for your DH being called a paedo, that just makes the person who made the comment, sound odd

I'd say that 11 year olds generally wouldn't want that type of party anyway so wouldn't repeat this year.

Your party sounds brilliant. In our school, a family had a Halloween party and the dad did a formidable Count Dracula. I thought he was brilliant. I bet as many parents thought it wonderful, but they won't say so after a year!

The man that called your DH a peado, was this because he played with children and didn't go down the pub whilst the party was happening? Toxic masculine attitude!

You need to let it go, it will be nearly forgotten by the others now.
Agree those that were nasty were probably jealous/used to a different way of doing things.

But your thread does also bring up a distinction between being bullied and being teased. I think most children get teased about some thing or other at some point in their school life, it's just part and parcel of childhood. I don't say that lightly, it's not pleasant bejng teased, but it's different from actual bullying isn't it?

Well, probably YWBU to take it to the head.

It doesn't stop those other parents being twats though. I think people who label other parents as "try hards" say that because they can be arsed to put the effort in themselves and it deflects from their lack of effort.

Ignore. These people don't seem very bright, tbh. Good for you and your DH for making the effort.

(Ps the party sounds fab and all of my children would have loved it!!)

Twunts.
Village I used to live in one parent did a HUGE Halloween Party.
hundreds of High School kids went. It was properly amazing.
Yours sounds great fun.

DONT bring it up though. Leave it.

What does "DH can be a little theatrical" mean?

Perhaps he went OTT with acting like a vampire.

Op, ignore it. You really dont want to bother about the kind of people who said you're husband was a 'Paedo'. They are in fact green with envy about your party.

Perhaps keep the following in mind

www.coolfunnyquotes.com/author/anonymous/never-wrestle-pig/

qph.ec.quoracdn.net/main-qimg-5d88e6aff2404569762a577fec91e939-c

If I or my children had come to your party I would think you were super cool. Ignore those pathetic people that don't know how to have fun! X

Where I live we absolutely love the people that go to all the trouble to make it fun and extra special and my kids would have been thrilled including the older ones.

I think they're just jealous that you did it. They could have but didn't so their choice and the paedo comment is just ignorant. Put it down to experience and move on though.

So sorry op

That's disgusting, and I think a majority if the kids bullying was because of comments made between the parent, jealousy definately.

I've had this in the past, because you try hard for your kids and others see it as a threat to their own lacklustre parenting skills.

Fuck em