Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

New ish boyfriend - masonic lodge - weird?

353 replies

Creambun2 · 08/09/2017 17:17

Have been seeing a guy for just over three months now, all going well, seems a "normal" person (important for me after some awful relationships). However, this guy is part of masonic lodge and is asking me to come to some "ladies" night - sounds like some do from the 1930s or something.

AIBU to think this is a bit weird? He is in his early 30s. The only knowledge of the masonic world I have is that they used to deliver my grandmother a Christmas hamper every year after my grandfather died.

Why would a young bloke want to mess around in aprons doing "rituals" with loads of probably older men?! Is he going to suggest sex with aprons and gloves next Grin

Anyone got any experience of this or been to one of these ladies nights ever?

OP posts:
mrszebrastripe · 08/09/2017 17:20

Me!!! Ex DP's dad was a mason and we attended a Ladies Night many years ago. It was nothing sinister at all, just a slightly naff dinner / dance with a raffle. All a bit 70s but not an apron or rolled up trouser leg in sight!

IrritatedUser1960 · 08/09/2017 17:21

Loads of young men are doing it now. Its just a form of networking.

Jeffstar79 · 08/09/2017 17:21

Maybe it's a family thing? I've known someone go basically because their dad did. Ladies nights are big charity fundraisers usually. I've not been to one but a friend goes regularly and always seems to enjoy it.

ILoveMillhousesDad · 08/09/2017 17:22

It's usually local businessmen who pass business each others way I think on a low level.

It's all a bit odd if you ask me, but I don't think it is sinister until the upper echelons, high up police, judges etc.

BackforGood · 08/09/2017 17:27

Me! I love a ladies night - food is fab, plenty of wine, and then some entertainment - might be a dance might not, but a lovely evening.

Storminateapot · 08/09/2017 17:30

I've been to one, it's just dinner & dancing in a posh frock, quite a nice night really in a grown ups kind of way. Masons is really just like Round Table or Rotary - a chance for blokes in their 30's/40's etc to network. Nothing weird or dodgy, not a hint of handshakes or odd ceremonials to it.

QueenofLouisiana · 08/09/2017 17:31

I've been to a few as my DStepD is a mason. Good food, drinks, slightly cheesy disco, presents on tables for the women (some good, some a bit naff but the thought was nice). A good excuse to get dressed up and have a night out.

There will be a few speeches, the head mason (Grandmaster or whatever) will wax lyrical about his partner/ daughters etc. It's mainly a charity fundraiser as the masons give a lot of cash to charities.

ourkidmolly · 08/09/2017 17:34

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Sodaface · 08/09/2017 17:34

Emm.... ok I think you need to be a bit more open minded!

QueenofLouisiana · 08/09/2017 17:35

Oh, traditionally, the idea of family and support is important to Masons, so it would fit in with your new boyfriend being a decent bloke. The Masonic community was very good to my grandmother in her final years, providing quality care at a very affordable price (essentially free).

scrabbler3 · 08/09/2017 17:36

It's just networking.

I used to go to the children's Christmas parties in the 1979s/1980s. Very fond memories.

Storminateapot · 08/09/2017 17:36

What nonsense - not completely white or heterosexual at all! Might have been back in the day, not now. What odd ideas some of you have. It really is just networking & charity fundraising.

imjessie · 08/09/2017 17:36

It's definitely the new networking , it's actually ok. Don't be freaked out by it .

PlaymobilPirate · 08/09/2017 17:37

My dad is a Mason - his lodge doesn't run anymore but I loved going to ladies night (do ladies still get a gift?? I had to wrap shite loads when dad was Master)

Temporaryanonymity · 08/09/2017 17:37

What ourkidmolly said. I would refuse on the basis that Masons are men only and make our institutions corrupt. No amount of charity work can change that.

Gottagetmoving · 08/09/2017 17:38

A very weird and corrupt organisation which is completely and exclusively white, heterosexual and male. Avoid

This
Not to be encouraged.

Racoonworld · 08/09/2017 17:38

I've been to a few, they are actually quite fun with lots of wine and dancing. Ladies night is the one night of the year the wives and girlfriends get to go to a masonic event, and it is to say thanks for letting the men go. It is a little bit sexist at times, but if you ignore those parts it is a good night. Wear a fancy dress, everyone at the ones I have been to wore a floor length black tie style dress.

KittysMyName · 08/09/2017 17:39

Ourkidmolly that's not right at all! I know black and gay Masons!

It's a very old fashioned, kind organisation that does a huge amount for charity.

pasturesgreen · 08/09/2017 17:40

Not weird at all, I'd say. I know a few Masons in their 40s (that I know of, there may be more), it's mainly a networking opportunities these days.

Dizzywizz · 08/09/2017 17:40

My friend is a female Mason. It's not just men.

BeachysFlipFlops · 08/09/2017 17:41

We had prayers and a hymn at the one we went to Hmm plus some odd 'rituals' mostly relating to women, presents etc.

I think Masons in business is one thing, they have proved a problem in some organisations like the police as there is a perceived conflict of interest...

IrenetheQuaint · 08/09/2017 17:41

'thanks for letting the men go'Hmm

Temporaryanonymity · 08/09/2017 17:41

Oh well that's ok then. So long as they are kind and give the women presents then we can ignore all the dodgy stuff....

brasty · 08/09/2017 17:42

I would stay well away from any bloke involved.

Minervamouse77 · 08/09/2017 17:43

My Dad is a mason and i went to my first ladies night when I was probably about 10 when he had the role of grand master and i've been to plenty since. It's a lovely fundraising event where you get to dress up and enjoy nice food, drink and have a dance. whilst I don't agree with the male privacy of it (being a bit of a feminist), they do wonderful things for charity and they look after their members and their families so i'd never knock it. Go and enjoy yourself.